After I Died, My Husband Went Mad [EN]: Chapter 55

After receiving Denisa’s express mail and leaving Earlsick, Sebelia made a request at the inn, anticipating that Denisa would later try to find her. She left a note:

“[If someone describes my appearance and shows a ring that matches this one, please give them the letter I left.]”

Time passed relentlessly. If she were in Supredy now, she could send a letter to the inn to check if Denisa had visited, but that was impossible for now.

‘I don’t feel comfortable asking Claude.’

Even if Dihart had lost his memory, Claude was definitely a member of Inverness. Entrusting something that could reveal her identity to someone who posed a risk didn’t sit well with her.

“What should I do……”

As Sebelia inadvertently sighed, a familiar voice echoed from behind.

“Are you unwell?”

It was Dihart. He was approaching, worry evident in his golden eyes. The usually sharp eyes were gently lowered, a sight she was still getting used to.

“No. I’m just feeling suffocated being inside all the time.”

“I see.”

“Yes.”

Sebelia fidgeted with the edge of a magazine, avoiding his gaze. Dihart placed a basket of cookies on the table and looked out the window.

‘It doesn’t seem like she’s just feeling suffocated. Is it still too much to expect an honest answer?’

Dihart felt inexplicably gloomy and fiddled with the edge of the cookie basket he had brought, mirroring her fidgeting. He didn’t know what to do in these situations. People had always catered to him, not the other way around.

No matter how much he imitated Ilay’s actions, he couldn’t completely copy his inner self. In short, Dihart felt like just an empty shell.

“Haa.”

“Hoo…….”

The two sighed simultaneously and then stared at each other in surprise. As soon as their eyes met, they immediately looked away. It was like watching a scene from a comedy. Claude, who was passing by, saw the scene. Tsk tsk. He clicked his tongue and called Dihart.

“Come and learn how to wash blankets.”

“……”

“You can’t call yourself a man if you don’t know how to wash blankets.”

Claude didn’t back down despite Dihart’s intense gaze. Dihart sighed silently, pushed the basket closer to Sebelia, and stood up.

“What’s going on?”

As they came out to the backyard, the chilly autumn sunlight poured down on their faces. Claude filled a large wooden tub with water and opened his mouth.

“I was talking to Bella earlier, and the story of Supredy came up briefly.”

“So?”

Dihart asked, bringing over the folded blanket. Claude made bubbles and hmm-ed before continuing.

“Did you bring knights with you to Supredy?”

“Ah.”

“Even people in the neighboring villages have been saying that the atmosphere in Supredy has been ominous lately. Knights in unmarked uniforms are wandering around.”

Thud. The blanket he was holding fell onto the grass. Claude was horrified and scolded him. But Dihart wasn’t in a state to hear his nagging.

“…Damn it, I forgot to contact them.”

Dihart then realized that he had been completely lost in thoughts of Sebelia. He wasn’t talking about after he found out she was real, but from the moment he was freed from confinement and faced Sebelia, Dihart was already out of his mind.

“How long has it been since you arrived here?”

“Almost two weeks.”

“Damn it, what a mistake.”

Dihart groaned. He hadn’t thought of the knights he had left behind for so long. It wasn’t hard to understand.

During that time, chaos had been raging in Dihart’s head every day. He had no energy or time to think about anything other than Sebelia.

“How could I forget that I left them behind? So much time has passed, and I didn’t feel anything strange at all.”

“…When people are absorbed in one thing, they sometimes let go of everything else. Whether they intended to or not.”

Claude dusted off the soiled blanket and said self-deprecatingly. He had also had such times, when he was desperately searching for Rosalyn, thinking she might still be alive.

“But you’re lucky. Most people waste their lives and only realize that they were caught up in vain delusions after losing everything they had.”

“…Is that so.”

Dihart sighed, pressed his fingers to his forehead, and looked at him.

“I have to contact Ilay right away. I don’t know what that guy is up to down there.”

He was about to ask the baron for a residence because he didn’t like the bedding. It had been two weeks since he left such a guy behind. Dihart felt a chill down his spine.

“It would be very troublesome if he’s causing trouble, claiming to be looking for me as Inverness.”

He wanted to think that Ilay wasn’t that stupid, but he couldn’t be sure. Dihart belatedly blamed Ryan and ran his hand over his face. Claude nodded as if he understood without being told.

“Prepare a letter or a sign or something to let them know you’re safe. I’ll deliver it when I go down in a few days.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re saying all sorts of things. Instead, step on the blankets.”

“So it’s not unpaid labor, I see.”

Dihart smiled bitterly and stepped into the wooden tub that was now full of water. The soft blanket was trampled under the cold, slippery water. And Sebelia was watching the scene from the window.

‘Yes, I’m lucky.’

Dihart admitted that he was really lucky, pulling up the bottom of his pants. Just a few days ago, he felt himself going mentally insane.

‘I realized then that there are hundreds of ways to go crazy.’

It was a different kind of mental pain than when he experienced Sebelia’s death and fell into despair, abandoning himself. He strangled himself in his imagination every time.

Himself wavering every time, thinking she might be the real Sebelia, and the ruthless self denying and denouncing him. Yes, I’m crazy, so all my thoughts are crazy, he felt self-loathing, and yet he couldn’t let go of the expectation that maybe, just maybe.

Two selves fought a bloody battle over Sebelia’s life and death.

Even in the moments when the wasteful arguments messed up his head, he couldn’t take his eyes off Sebelia. He made up reasons to stay by her side, whether she was fake or real.

That’s how captivated Dihart was by Sebelia. So much so that he couldn’t remember what he had left behind.

“At this rate, I have nothing to say even if I’m called crazy.”

Dihart frowned, pushing his feet deep into the slippery blanket.

Sebelia watched him from afar and got up. With no one watching her, Sebelia’s figure disappeared into the forest.

* * *

Sebelia carefully stepped into the forest in front of the mansion. Unlike the Forest of Nightmares, where you immediately fall into confusion if you step in the wrong place, the area from here to the lake was a safe zone.

She walked a little further from where she had been collecting black nail polish [a type of mushroom]. She walked for a few minutes, leaving marks between the dense trees.

“I found it properly.”

A small clearing surrounded by trees appeared. The clearing, covered with small weeds like clover, was soft enough to sit and rest comfortably. Sebelia placed the cookie basket she had brought just in case nearby and sat down.

“Hoo…….”

After catching her breath for a moment, Sebelia lightly raised her right hand. A faint breeze swept through the dense trees, and silence settled in the thicket.

Sebelia closed her eyes and focused on all her senses. One, two, three. Was it because she was using her power after so long? It wasn’t as easy as before.

‘I was able to create it in a short time at the inn…. Was it because the situation was urgent at that time that the power was exerted momentarily?’

Sebelia frowned and continued to concentrate. She was creating an illusion after a long time.

Soon, blue light burst out from between her bent fingers, as if she were holding an invisible ball.

Whack-!

A light weight was felt on her palm along with the sound of birds chirping.

‘Did I succeed?’

Sebelia carefully opened her tightly closed eyes. Black eyes, as shiny as buttons, were staring at her intently. Sebelia burst into laughter at the eyes that seemed to be asking why she had called him so late.

“Hello, it’s been a while.”

The blue bird chirped and flicked its tail before landing lightly on the grass. Sebelia breathed a sigh of relief at the bird’s appearance, which seemed unchanged.

There was a good reason why she had hidden in such a place to summon the illusion.

‘I need to find out what happened to Denisa.’

She also knew that the disease she had been suffering from was not Lichis but Thorn Tree Disease, and the treatment was progressing smoothly. She had almost run out of money, but she could use the knowledge she had learned from Wartz to get a job if she left this place later.

But that future would be meaningless without Denisa. She was the one who had sacrificed her life for her since she was young. To Sebelia, she was like a mother.

“It’s been almost two weeks, so she might have arrived in Earlsick by now.”

She had already guessed that Denisa’s journey would not have been smooth. Dihart had sent a note saying he had found her, so she probably shook him off and left the center. And she would have wandered for a while.

“Because of me…. Haa.”

Sebelia sighed, rubbing her cheek against the feathers of the blue bird that had already climbed onto her shoulder. And then she started practicing again.

‘Even a little faster……!’

She had to create an illusion to take her place while she secretly went to Supredy.