Dr. Shin Seonhan: The Doctor Who Sees The Future [EN]: Chapter 210

#210 Hawk Eyes, a Woman’s Hands, a Lion’s Heart (13)

“Professor Baek, are you perhaps talking about a live surgery?”

The hospital director asked, as if not believing his ears.

Live Surgery.

This refers to online/offline public surgeries that are occasionally performed at academic conferences. It’s an event to widely share medical know-how by broadcasting surgical scenes in real-time and allowing participating doctors to discuss surgical methods.

“Not for an academic conference, but simply for this surgery?”

“While we’re at it, why don’t we proceed with an academic event to discuss surgical methods for TGA [Transposition of the Great Arteries], VSD [Ventricular Septal Defect], and PS [Pulmonary Stenosis] diseases? Send out an email and tell people to come if they want.”

“There’s only one day, so many people won’t be able to come…….”

“Those who want to come will come.”

“Wouldn’t that be, how should I put it, too much pressure?”

“I like that kind of thing.”

“…….”

“These days, do they call it being an attention seeker?”

The hospital director broke out in a cold sweat at the words, unsure if they were a joke or serious.

A runaway train, so to speak.

Once it starts, it can’t be stopped.

It was a moment to reaffirm that Baek Yi-shin was that kind of person.

“Why are you so surprised? Don’t you remember we did it a few times in the past? You attended too.”

“That’s true, but still.”

The hospital director sighed and wiped his glasses.

Of course, there was sufficient justification.

The first surgery of its kind in the country.

It would have enough medical value to share externally.

However, the hospital director wanted to dissuade him if possible.

From the standpoint of being responsible for the hospital’s operations, Baek Yi-shin’s declaration was a headache.

‘Is this why the previous hospital director found him so difficult to deal with……?’

It had been a headache since he took the surgery away from Professor Ahn Young-wook in the conference room.

There is clearly a chain of command in the organization, and there are situations where you have to be mindful of others.

But Baek Yi-shin was the type of person who didn’t care about such things.

Only straight ahead.

The existence of Baek Yi-shin was a very sharp and useful knife, but also an existence that he didn’t know where to put.

So, for the time being, he had asked him to do easy surgeries and external activities.

In the end, it might have been only a matter of time before this happened.

‘If the surgery goes wrong after setting up such a stage…….’

It will never end as an individual problem.

The credibility of the entire Yeon-guk University Hospital will be questioned.

It was also clear that Professor Baek’s reputation would be fatally damaged.

“What about the guardian’s consent?”

“I already got it.”

“…….”

The last hope that the guardian might refuse disappeared.

“I’m telling you this because I’m going to show it to thoracic surgeons who can’t see this surgery directly for educational purposes. They’re probably dying to get into the operating room.”

The last words were ambiguous.

Was it a misunderstanding?

It was because Professor Baek’s words sounded like he wanted to show the surgical process to ‘someone specific’.

Moreover, when he said that, a slight warmth seemed to appear on Baek Yi-shin’s dry face.

He had known Baek Yi-shin for a long time, but it was the first time he had seen him make such an expression.

It was as if he was looking at a place far away, not here.

“……Well, anyway, now that things have come to this, I won’t stop you. Please do your best.”

The hospital director finally said, as if half giving up.

The operating room, a theater.

The stage was set.

The actors were fully prepared ahead of showtime.

* * *

D-1.

The day before the surgery.

The moment when all preparations should be proceeding smoothly, a problem arose.

“Song Yu-ju has broken down.”

“Yes?”

I opened my eyes wide at Ma Dong-seop’s words as we were making rounds together.

“Broken down?”

“She was late for the conference meeting this morning.”

“Ah…….”

I recalled the memory.

Indeed, everyone was surprised this morning.

Song Yu-ju being late?

It was the first time.

Of course, other residents would have taken it for granted, but it was special because it was Song Yu-ju.

“We haven’t known each other for long, but I think it’s the first time I’ve seen Song Yu-ju-sensei [term of respect] late too.”

The Song Yu-ju I had seen so far always moved according to a set schedule.

Perhaps even a programmed NPC [Non-Player Character] in a game would not be so regular.

“That’s not all.”

“Why?”

“She said she left her loupe (surgical magnifying glasses) at home, so she rushed home to get it.”

I scratched my cheek.

Isn’t that a minor mistake?

But Ma Dong-seop said without taking away his worried expression.

“Could it be that her mental state has collapsed?”

I thought I misheard.

Mental state collapsed?

It was an expression that didn’t suit Song Yu-ju-sensei at all, whom I knew.

“Song Yu-ju-sensei?”

“I’ve been friends with her for a long time, so I can tell just by looking at her face. She made mistakes all day today that she never used to make, and then she left as if possessed by something.”

Listening to the story of Ma Dong-seop, who is her close friend, I realized that it was definitely not a normal thing.

‘Indeed, there is no one who never wavers in any situation.’

Who is Song Yu-ju?

She is the person who always maintained the same poker face even when the professor got angry or the patient caused trouble.

Perhaps even if she fell in the middle of a battlefield, she would not change her expression and would find a way to survive.

In a word, a steel mentality.

But for such a person to be shaken…….

“Could it be that she is too nervous about the big surgery tomorrow?”

“I think so.”

Ma Dong-seop scratched the bridge of his nose.

“Actually, I haven’t said it until now, but Yu-ju is as much of a follower of Professor Baek as you are, Seon-han. The reason she applied to the Department of Thoracic Surgery in the first place was because she followed Professor Baek.”

I opened my eyes wide.

It’s the first time I’ve heard of it.

I didn’t think there would be another person like me, but it was Song Yu-ju-sensei.

“When Yu-ju entered her first year, Professor Baek had gone to the United States. So, it’s Yu-ju’s first time doing surgery with Professor Baek.”

A surgery where they are working together for the first time…….

As a fellow Baek Yi-shin follower, I could understand her heart at once.

“Moreover, because it’s such an important surgery, she seems worried that she might cause trouble for Professor Baek. It’s the first time I’ve seen her like this.”

As I listened, I became worried.

In tomorrow’s surgery, Song Yu-ju’s role is the second assistant, but it’s a pretty important role.

Since it is a surgery that requires perfection, even a minor mistake can be fatal.

“Where is Song Yu-ju-sensei?”

“I don’t know either.”

“Hmm…….”

I think I know why.

Because I’ve seen it in my dreams a few times.

There was a place that Song Yu-ju-sensei always went to when she was mentally struggling.

‘I think she usually doesn’t smoke, but I’ve seen her smoking sometimes.’

The place is the smoking area behind the hospital.

I skipped dinner and headed there.

‘I knew it was here.’

The back of the hospital where the sunset was setting.

I was soon able to find Song Yu-ju-sensei.

She was wearing a thick padding, but it was a familiar back view.

Hair tied up tightly, slender neck and hands.

A thin pack of cigarettes that seemed to have been newly bought and opened was placed on the bench.

Next to it were four short cigarette butts.

In other words, she smoked a chain of cigarettes while sitting there.

“Song Yu-ju-sensei.”

“Oh, why?”

Song Yu-ju-sensei looked up at me with surprised eyes.

Her voice was different from usual.

It didn’t seem to be just because the weather was cold.

It was clear to anyone that her body was stiff with tension.

I sat next to her and handed her a can of coffee I had bought from the convenience store.

“I bought something warm because it’s cold.”

“How did you know I was here?”

“I just had a feeling.”

Click-

The scent of coffee rises as I open the can.

The weather is so cold that my hands are numb.

We looked at the sunset for a while and drank coffee without saying a word.

Red sunlight was scattered among the bare winter trees, and the lights were bright in every window of the ward.

Even at this moment, hundreds of patients and medical staff would be finishing their respective days.

“That new surgical method tomorrow…… will it go well?”

“Of course. Don’t underestimate Brazilian medical skills.”

“You said Da Silva was Brazilian, right?”

“Yeah, the Arterial Switch Operation, which is widely performed worldwide for TGA. That’s also a surgical method devised by a Brazilian doctor.”

Song Yu-ju put out her cigarette and continued.

“It’s a surgery that’s not done now, but have you heard of the Batista procedure that came out in an old famous comic book?”

Batista surgery?

I’ve heard of it.

It was a regular surgical method that often appeared in medical novels or comics with thoracic surgery as the subject.

I rummaged through my memories and said.

“Are you talking about the LV reduction (left ventricular muscle removal) surgery performed in DCMP (dilated cardiomyopathy)?”

“Yes, it’s a surgery that’s not done these days because heart transplants are easy. That surgery was also devised by a Brazilian doctor.”

“Batista was the name of a Brazilian doctor.”

“That’s right.”

When you say Brazil, you usually don’t easily think of it as the forefront of medicine.

But that’s not the case at all.

Even at this moment, many doctors from all over the world are making various attempts.

They are constantly thinking about what is the best surgery for the patient and are constantly improving.

“Of course, I believe Professor Baek will do well. I hope I don’t cause any trouble…….”

Song Yu-ju’s gaze was shaking as she trailed off.

“Yu-ju-sensei will do well.”

“On what basis?”

“Gut feeling.”

“That gut feeling again?”

“You know I have a good gut feeling.”

I joked.

Could it be that the tension has eased somewhat?

Song Yu-ju chuckled and glanced at my face.

“I’ve been wondering about this for a while. Do you even see the future?”

Cough, cough.

I almost spit out the coffee I was drinking.

“What are you talking about?”

“You were like that when you saw the patient who needed ECMO [Extracorporeal Membrane Oxygenation], and when you found the torsion patient. Your words were mostly right.”

Come to think of it, I had forgotten for a moment.

Song Yu-ju-sensei had a pretty sharp intuition, right?

Of course, she probably didn’t seriously suspect me and ask me in this situation.

Anyway, when you’re anxious, it’s human nature to want to know the future even a little bit.

“How is it? What’s your gut feeling about this surgery?”

“…….”

I paused for a moment.

The future I saw.

Among those many paths, there was no bright path.

Perhaps it was fate that Lee Seul-gi could not be saved no matter what.

But I lied to ease Song Yu-ju’s burden.

“I believe the best outcome will return to the patient.”

“Okay. I wasn’t asking seriously, why are you thinking and answering for so long?”

Song Yu-ju shook off her butt and got up from her seat.

“Thanks for the coffee.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Don’t tell Ma Dong-seop that I smoked.”

Song Yu-ju put the coffee can, cigarettes, and lighter in the trash can and disappeared with a slightly lighter step.

‘Now it’s really out of my hands.’

Is this method really right?

I don’t know.

Maybe it will fail miserably.

But I believe. No, I have no choice but to believe.

Because the doctors I have believed in and followed so far will do their best.

* * *

That night.

I had a dream.

It was a landscape I had never seen before.

A pure white space as if all the colors in the world had been completely removed.

A strange voice was heard from somewhere.

It was the first time I heard it, but it felt like it wasn’t the first time.

Suddenly, something appears in front of my eyes.

In the bleached landscape, I was crying as a child.

I, as an adult, couldn’t even think of patting her shoulder and could only watch a few steps away.

It’s a natural story.

I soon realized the identity of the voice.

This is the voice in my own heart.

“I’m not working to heal my trauma.”

I shook my head calmly and answered.

Of course, I had decided to become a doctor after experiencing my mother’s death.

But memories are just memories.

That’s not the fundamental motivation that drives my heart.

It’s not money or fame.

Even the admiration for Professor Baek was now close to being secondary.

“Because I’m a doctor, I do the work of a doctor. There’s no other reason.”

“Yes, that’s all.”

“I don’t care.”

I tried my best within my means to save the patient.

Because I’m a doctor, I did the work of a doctor.

The moment I thought so.

I woke up.

The familiar scenery of the dormitory was visible.

I calmly concluded to myself, and said once again.

“Yeah, I don’t care.”

I picked up my gown.

Today is the day of Lee Seul-gi’s surgery, but there are many other patients I need to take care of.

I will accumulate experience and grow into a surgeon.

Of course, I may encounter walls every time…….

I will move forward.

I will find the answer.

Desperately, somehow.

Because countless doctors have walked that path so far.

* * *

D-0.

The day of Lee Seul-gi’s surgery.

In the afternoon, the basement auditorium of the hospital began to become bustling.