An Actor Who Has Lived For 10,000 Years [EN]: Chapter 258

258 #47 – As Instinct Leads (1)

“I’m so frustrated, how long do I have to wait?”

Song Yoona pouted, staring at her silent cell phone.

“I don’t even know when he’ll be back in Korea. And I can’t even reach him…”

Since returning to Korea, she checked for articles about Jin Heesung and any updates on his social media whenever she had a moment.

And she contacted her manager, Chief Choi, every day to get news from WG Entertainment, the only place where she could hear about Jin Heesung.

“I should check if there’s any new information.”

Song Yoona picked up her phone and called Chief Choi.

Chief Choi’s voice came through before the second ring.

– Hello?

“Oppa.”

– Yeah, Yoona.

“Are you on set?”

– No, not on set… but what’s up?

“No, it’s just…”

Song Yoona wanted to ask outright when Jin Heesung was coming back to Korea, what he was doing in the States, and if his manager had said anything.

But she couldn’t bring herself to even mention Jin Heesung’s name.

She beat around the bush, asking about company matters instead.

“Oh… what happened to that script we talked about?”

– Script?

“Yeah, the movie script you mentioned last time.”

Caught off guard by her random question, Chief Choi responded.

– Movie script… are you talking about Director Choi’s project?

She nodded vaguely.

“Yeah… yeah, is the script out?”

– No. That’ll take a very long time. That’s why I didn’t tell you about it. Were you waiting for it?

“I wasn’t particularly waiting for Director Choi’s project. I was just curious.”

– I didn’t know. I should have told you. Sorry.

“It’s okay, no need to apologize.”

She swallowed awkwardly, and Song Yoona perked up her ears at the sounds around Chief Choi.

“Oppa, are you at the office?”

– Yeah, I’m at the office. Why?

Hearing that he was at the office, Song Yoona’s eyes sparkled, and she stood up.

“Great. I’ll head over to the office then.”

– To the office?

“Yeah, I’ll look at the new scripts and check my schedule for the year.”

Chief Choi stammered, taken aback by her sudden interest in her schedule.

She only came to the office when there was a specific reason.

Chief Choi wondered if he hadn’t informed Song Yoona of her schedule and flipped through his planner with shaking eyes.

– I’ve already organized and sent you the schedule. Should I reorganize it and send it again?

“No. You’re at the office, right? I’ll just go there and check.”

– You’re coming to the office just for that?

“I’ll look at some scripts too.”

– Yoona, you’re coming to see scripts…?”

“Why, can’t I?”

– It’s not that you can’t… I’ve always brought them to your house. If there’s a script you want to see, I’ll organize it and bring it to you.”

Song Yoona frowned at his words.

She was hoping to hear something about Jin Heesung at the company.

And she had to go to the company herself for that.

“No. I’m going to the office, okay?”

Her tone suddenly turned cold.

– Oh… are you?

“You’re already at the office. You’d have to gather everything and come to me. Why bother? I’ll come to you.”

It sounded like she was being considerate, but her tone wasn’t.

Chief Choi tilted his head, unsure of Song Yoona’s intentions.

– …I appreciate it if you do.

“Okay. I’ll head to the office right away.”

– Okay.

Chief Choi hung up and scratched his head.

“What’s going on? Yoona offered to come to the office first…”

He wondered about Song Yoona but quickly started looking for scripts to prepare for her arrival.

A few hours later.

“Yoona, you’re here?”

Chief Choi waved as he saw Song Yoona arrive at the company.

“Oh, Oppa.”

“I could have picked you up.”

“It’s okay. There’s no point in me coming if you do that.”

Chief Choi nodded in agreement.

Song Yoona stretched her neck, looking around as if searching for something.

She was checking if Jin Heesung’s manager was in the office.

If he was, it meant Jin Heesung was in Korea or would be coming soon.

But Kim wasn’t in her sight.

Seeing her looking around, Chief Choi stretched his neck as well and asked.

“Yoona, are you looking for someone?”

At his question, Song Yoona quickly shook her head.

“No, who would I be looking for?”

“I guess not.”

Then, he handed her the scripts he had prepared in advance.

“Here. These are the new scripts, organized by genre…”

Song Yoona glanced at the pile of scripts and asked Chief Choi.

“Oppa, is everything okay at the company?”

Chief Choi looked puzzled at her question.

“Well… nothing’s really happening at the company. Why, did you hear any rumors?”

“No. I was just wondering if there were any issues with our company’s celebrities.”

Chief Choi narrowed his eyes and looked at Song Yoona, noticing her unusual behavior.

“You’re not usually interested in other celebrities.”

Feeling cornered, she retorted.

“It’s not that I’m interested. I’m just worried that I’ll get caught in the crossfire because of them!”

Chief Choi exclaimed at Song Yoona’s raised voice.

“Oh… I thought something was up.”

She shrugged and swallowed hard.

Chief Choi gestured to Song Yoona, aware of their surroundings.

At his gesture, Song Yoona’s eyes widened, and she moved closer to Chief Choi.

He lowered his voice and whispered.

“Han Yoonseon’s school bullying scandal broke out, and her contract will be terminated.”

Han Yoonseon was someone Song Yoona didn’t care about.

Disappointed, she contorted her face and leaned back from Chief Choi.

“Ugh, what is that.”

“Isn’t that what you wanted to know?”

“Well… yeah, but.”

“And there’s one more thing, retirement news!”

Chief Choi snapped his fingers, and Song Yoona tilted her head.

“Who’s retiring?”

He nodded vigorously and approached Song Yoona.

“They just announced it. Jin Heesung is retiring…”

Before Chief Choi could finish, Song Yoona pushed him away and jumped up.

“What, Jin Heesung?”

He put his index finger to her lips, silencing her.

“Yoona, shh.”

Song Yoona’s face flushed red.

She took a deep breath, sat back down, and asked in a calmer voice.

“What do you mean Jin Heesung is retiring? Explain it to me in detail.”

***

Clink-

The glasses clinked, and the full glasses of alcohol sloshed.

“It’s been a while since I’ve had a drink with you alone, Senior.”

Choi Seobin chuckled and replied to me.

“We drank in LA last time.”

“I mean in Korea.”

At my words, he emptied his glass and replied.

“That’s true. It’s been a while since I had soju [Korean distilled rice liquor]. Haha.”

I followed suit and downed my soju.

Choi Seobin put his glass on the table and started, as if to comfort me.

“You didn’t win the award at the awards ceremony that time, you must be upset, right?”

His words reminded me of the Academy Awards, which I had forgotten.

But I didn’t have much attachment to the award I didn’t receive, so I smiled and shook my head.

“No. It just wasn’t my award.”

My life was too spectacular to be consumed by the disappointment of not receiving that award.

There was no room to pour emotions into it.

Choi Seobin had no idea about my feelings.

He began to offer me comfort and advice in earnest.

“Yeah, that’s right. An actor doesn’t act for awards anyway.”

I just nodded in agreement with his words.

“Yes, that’s right.”

“It’s the same in Korea. Even if a drama does well at the beginning of the year, the drama filmed at the end of the year gets more awards.”

He refilled my empty glass and continued.

“So, what I’m saying is, there’s no need to be sad while clinging to awards.”

“Yes, I don’t care much about it anymore.”

“That’s a relief.”

Choi Seobin smiled and raised his glass.

Clink-

Once again, our glasses clinked with a clear sound.

And the bottles of alcohol piled up one by one.

Our conversation was getting deeper and deeper.

“So, being an actor is just like any other job, like an office worker, doctor, or CEO.”

“That’s right. It’s just one of many jobs.”

“Rather, we have a more precarious job. Actors can only act if they are needed, and they only make money if they act.”

I nodded at Choi Seobin’s words.

When I arrived at the drinking session and started talking to him.

To be honest, I found the comfort he gave me ridiculous.

Choi Seobin was a young man who had only lived for 40 years.

And I had lived for an incomparably long time, a full 10,000 years.

Choi Seobin was generous with his stories and advice about his life to me, who he saw as young, so it was unlikely to reach my ears.

Nevertheless, as I listened to Choi Seobin’s story, the door to my tightly closed heart began to open little by little.

Choi Seobin’s sincere stories to me as an actor.

It seemed to have something in common with the life of Jin Heesung and the 10,000 years of life that would unfold again.

“I’m afraid of the future, and I’m anxious.”

He was expressing his concerns about a long run as an actor.

But I was worried about the future beyond being an actor.

“Yes. As an actor, I can never know what will happen to me in the entertainment industry. As I climbed up here, I couldn’t predict any of my projects.”

The topic was different, but.

If we talked without bringing up that ‘topic,’ our conversation blended in strangely well.

Without breaking the flow of the conversation, I murmured as if complaining.

“I don’t know how to solve and endure this long time in the future.”

Choi Seobin gave an answer without hesitation.

“If it’s that kind of problem, it’s easy.”

“Yes?”

“Do whatever you want.”

At his words, I took a short breath and replied.

“I’ve tried that. I’ve always been dreaming of what I want to do…”

Choi Seobin cut me off and said firmly.

“That’s not it.”

He raised one corner of his mouth and looked at me.

“Heesung, I’m just going to speak comfortably because I’ve had a drink.”

“Yes, of course.”

Choi Seobin made eye contact with me, stretched out his index finger, and shouted.

“Do whatever the f*ck you want.”

I widened my eyes at his harsh words.

“Why do you think you have to do something? Just live doing what you want to do.”

“But…”

“Forget about those dreams and goals, and just live as you please.”

“If you want to sleep, sleep. If you want to eat, eat. If you want to play, play. If you want to attract attention, go to Gangnam [affluent area in Seoul] and walk around without a manager.”

He held a clinking glass in his hand and raised one eyebrow.

“Of course, you have to take responsibility for it, but put that aside. Instead of the ‘dreams’ you want, do what you want to do as your instincts lead you.”

Choi Seobin emptied his glass, and I stared blankly at Choi Seobin.

“Heesung, you… you have to do that to have a long run.”

As his advice, which was like a warning, ended, something suddenly seemed to boil up from deep within my chest.

It wasn’t just passion and desire burning.

It felt like the frame I had lived in, thinking it was right, was breaking.

I immediately emptied the glass in front of me, as if to cool my chest.