Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 163

163.

I had briefly wondered, what could be so different about Japanese broadcasts?

And, quite naturally, I resolved that question by asking Junseong, who came to visit the studio.

“I’m scheduled to appear on a Japanese broadcast, is there anything different about it?”

Junseong chuckled at my question and patted my back sympathetically.

“It might be tough on you with your personality, what to do, our composer? Japanese idol broadcasts are a bit… like that. There are times when it can be difficult,” he muttered.

Yeon also came along for the visit, and after pondering something with his eyes closed, he burst out laughing, ‘Pfft—’.

At the time, I thought they were making a fuss. I didn’t know that it was actually a very restrained expression.

In the resumed broadcast, I felt like I was fighting alone. In a moment where everyone unanimously wished for my defeat, I felt a sense of solitude.

“Hamin, I’m disappointed.”

I muttered and sat down in the chair. I didn’t think you would be like this, Hamin.

“Heok, sorry. But it’s so fun to see you embarrassed…….”

If you say things like that, who in the world can I trust?

Mr. Musashi was also laughing as if he was going crazy with how much he was enjoying the situation.

“Ah, the game rules are simple. It’s a character quiz! Sometimes it might not be a character.”

What are you talking about? If it’s a character quiz but not a character, that’s like putting an English question on a Korean language test.

“Oh… this seems really disadvantageous for Donghwa.”

Lee Hyunjae nodded as if he had realized it alone. Ha, Hyunjae, my memory isn’t that bad. There’s no way I’d forget the names of historical figures.

* * *

It was a miscalculation. Damn it.

The person in the photo that the staff member held up was someone I was meeting for the first time. Having little interest in sports, movies, and dramas, I kept giving the wrong answers.

On the other hand, the other members were competing to shout out the answers they knew as soon as they saw the pictures.

‘Did I really live without watching TV? Damn it.’

“Ah… Donghwa, that person is a very famous actor…….”

How would I know the name of an American actor?

“That’s a very famous animated movie character, don’t you know it?”

“Wow, I wanted Donghwa to lose, but this is a bit…….”

It felt like an assassin was aiming for my life. Could it be that everyone on set was plotting to kill me?

“Rather, rather a picture of a scientist!”

I insisted with a feeling of final desperation.

“Or, philosophers are good too.”

“Oh, Donghwa’s last struggle! Good! It feels like a final echo, right?”

Mr. Musashi nodded.

“Let’s do some of the difficult characters that were originally prepared, PD [Production Director]!”

Finally, finally a counterattack! Perhaps because I didn’t have many losses in games with the members, I became a little calmer. Beyond competitiveness, a desire for survival was kicking in.

Whirr.

A paper went up. A black and white photo, a Westerner. And a pipe and a fedora. A photo that screamed what era the person was from. All the other members narrowed their eyes and tried to figure out who it was.

Ah, finally, a familiar face. A scientist known for contributing to the creation of the atomic bomb. I closed my eyes, reveling in victory, and opened my mouth.

“Answer. Julius Robert Oppenheimer.”

Mr. Musashi was startled and nodded.

“Wow, crazy. He doesn’t know actress Ha Yeon-soo but knows Oppenheimer’s full name right away…….”

The members also applauded. This, this is victory. Now, if I get a few more of these right.

“Yes, Donghwa gets the last question of today’s game! And records last place!”

……There won’t even be a chance, damn it.

“Yes, today’s loser, please accept the penalty willingly!”

Frustration. Betrayal. Regret and depression. Before I knew it, I was alone on the set, and on the other side, the members were watching me with smiles.

I nodded solemnly.

“Today’s penalty is, a set of 15 aegyo [acting cute] poses.”

What is that again?

“You have to do all fifteen types of aegyo we’ve prepared in front of the camera alone. There will be time to capture it, so everyone please look forward to it.”

……I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them.

A staff member proudly nodded and held up a panel so that it was clearly visible.

‘(Imitating a cat) Meow, give me food.’

I squeezed my eyes shut again. I lifted my head to the ceiling.

Ding!

[Ah…, I’m going to disconnect for a while! I don’t think I can watch with my eyes open!]

A message of humiliation from Gisea that I could see even with my eyes closed.

…What do people live for? Isn’t self-esteem the most essential thing for people to live?

‘Wouldn’t it be okay to hit each of the members’ heads with a brick today?’

The sound of a cell phone video recording rang out from somewhere.

When I opened my eyes, Ryu Ideun was filming me.

‘If I hit that cell phone with a brick, wouldn’t it all disappear?’

I thought so and raised both hands in fists. The most basic thing about imitating a cat is grooming, I concluded.

‘If I kill everyone, it’ll be okay.’

And I should die with them, damn it.

* * *

Sales, sales are a very important concept in a capitalist society. The key to promoting overseas is to maximize the number of consumers with purchasing power. It’s also a process to resell even a dead album once again.

“Anyway, the reaction isn’t bad.”

Lee Hyunjae must have been taking a break from studying and looked at his tablet. Even while waiting for the plane to Hong Kong after finishing the Japanese schedule, he’s checking the reactions.

“Really?”

Ryu Ideun and Chae Hamin also seemed interested and sat down next to him to listen. He’s not the National Statistical Office for nothing, Lee Hyunjae.

“Yes. After finishing the Japanese schedule, the album is selling…….”

Curiosity, those three letters filled my head. What are we that people from other countries pour affection on us? It’s an area worth exploring seriously.

“It feels a bit strange.”

Chae Hamin mumbled, putting his arm around my shoulder. Don’t use me as an armrest.

“How did we get here?”

He’s saying something stupid again.

“…You worked hard.”

“Huh?”

“How else would you get here? You came because you worked hard.”

These guys grumble that I’m crazy about work, but it’s an undeniable fact that they’re just as crazy. Chae Hamin, who goes to the dance teacher every day to come up with ideas, Lee Hyunjae, whose brain is pickled in statistics, Ryu Ideun, who meticulously checks every little thing about the members and every rumor around them, Seokjun, who’s crazy about Wizney, they’re all the same.

……Wait, Jun, you.

Anyway, the gradually rising position, at the bottom of it, there must be the efforts that each of us has built up.

I could see Chae Hamin’s eyes slowly shaking at my firm words. It’s really hard to accept being moved by something so obvious. I always think, would you be moved by the fact that the Earth rotates?

“Donghwa-yaa.”

Chae Hamin unfolded his arm that was on my shoulder and strongly grabbed my neck. Seriously, is he trying to kill me? I felt like I was going to have trouble breathing with my throat being squeezed so tightly.

“Le-let go, neck, crazy rabbit.”

In the face of a threat to my life, my thoughts came out of my throat as they were. The beasts who had been looking at me with equally moved eyes finally came to their senses and started to stop Chae Hamin.

“Hey, Hamin, Donghwa will die if you do that. Then we all have to die together.”

“That’s right, hyung [older brother/male friend]. Donghwa hyung cursed us to die together at the same time.”

That never happened. It’s a memory that I burned in my mental library, so it definitely never happened.

“Donghwa! We have to be more successful!”

Even in the midst of that, Chae Hamin didn’t stop choking me, and he put even more strength into bringing me closer to the brink of death.

‘…I miss, Mokwha.’

They always say you think of your family before you die, I didn’t know I’d find out like this.

Ryu Ideun finally pulled Chae Hamin away and I slumped down on the bench. That crazy rabbit. Trying to send someone to the afterlife like this. I knew it when I agreed to Ryu Ideun’s assassination plan before.

Cough, cough, I coughed a few times and raised my head again.

But even so, Chae Hamin was still in a wave of emotion, holding my hand tightly and shaking it up and down like crazy.

“I! Really! Donghwa, I really don’t know how to thank you! Take my dad’s company later!”

I was shocked and turned my gaze to Ryu Ideun. With a look full of the question, ‘Do you know why he’s like this?’

“Wow, Hamin is half crazy…….”

Ryu Ideun let out a hollow laugh.

“I’m not crazy. Really, I’m really grateful.”

I was filled with questions again. What is he so grateful for that he’s acting like this?

“…I just worked hard like you.”

“That’s what I’m grateful for!”

“Then I’m grateful to you too.”

“That’s right!”

Chae Hamin nodded his head in place as if he was so happy.

“Then there’s no need to give me the company. Equivalent exchange, it’s already done.”

Pause. Chae Hamin seemed to stop thinking at my words and slowly mouthed the words as if he was chewing them over.

“Is that, so?”

“That’s right. Because I’m as grateful as you are.”

“…No. I’m sure I’m more grateful.”

“Trust me, Hamin. It’s an equivalent exchange, already.”

Isn’t that the basics of capitalism?

* * *

I started knitting on the plane. This… is surprisingly fun. I felt like I had lost to Ryu Ideun.

And countless thoughts came to mind. I looked at each one carefully.

First, Yeon’s matter. Yeon still hasn’t given me any specific explanation on how to help him. Just a while ago, he sent me a text asking if I knew anything about Park Woojin, so I’ll have to help him properly according to the principles of capitalism.

Second, Ms. Hwayang, who was my mother’s friend. I don’t know how she’ll help, but I thought it would be great if she could help me and Mokwha as well.

Third, I don’t really know why Chae Hamin is like that.

Fourth, fifth, countless thoughts filled my mind, but as I continued to knit, I wasn’t buried in them.

I briefly looked at the hot pink scarf that was already about two spans [a traditional Korean unit of measurement, roughly the distance between the tip of the thumb and the tip of the little finger when the hand is stretched out] long, knitted by moving my hands.

Yes, it must be going forward by being woven one stitch at a time like this. The efforts of each moment gather and gather to produce the result of a scarf.

I turned my gaze to Chae Hamin, who was leaning his head on my shoulder and sleeping next to me. And I saw Lee Hyunjae, who was holding onto my sleeve and sleeping on the other side.

Hmm, it feels strange. Just as the members depend on me, I must be depending on them too. That curse-filled promise that came out of that damn drinking habit proves it.

‘Ah, shame.’

I slammed my head against the chair once. I wish my memory wasn’t so good at times like this.

Beyond the window, I could see the sky with clouds floating in it. A different feeling from when I ran away to Germany before. I don’t know what it will feel like in about 3 weeks, when the overseas promotions are all over.

‘…Hmm, I’m quite happy.’

This is a reasonably satisfactory daily life.