Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 165

165.

Chaemin, flushed from his non-alcoholic beer, jumped up from his seat and started singing some random song.

“My only friend! A serenade dedicated to our Dong-hwa!”

Please, stop it. I’m getting sad just listening. Is he really drunk? Can a human even get drunk on non-alcoholic beer? Is it because he’s a rabbit? Damn it, save me. Get me out of this hell.

I stood up and chugged soju [Korean distilled rice liquor] straight from the bottle. It would be fine if I got drunk, but, ah, I can’t get drunk.

“Dong-hwa! I really love you! Friendship forever! I have no friends! When I’m with you, I have friends! I’m the happiest in the world!”

Stop it! I shouted inwardly. A silent scream. I’m like a flag tied to a flagpole, unable to leave this room. Yet, my hands quickly pressed the record button. I’ll make sure he experiences death by embarrassment tomorrow morning.

Chaemin’s song was turning into a wail. I’ve never heard a rabbit cry before, but here it is.

“Everyone else only sees my background! You’re the only one who sees my face!”

We’re not friends because of faces, you crazy bastard.

“You don’t try to use me, you don’t leave me lonely, you don’t show it even if you hate it, you always think of me, and I don’t hate that!”

Don’t rhyme. It’s even more embarrassing.

Chaemin sang with his eyes closed, then abruptly opened them wide and bowed ninety degrees in front of me.

“We’ll die together on the same day, I won’t allow anyone to die early.”

Oh, my god. I struggled to regain my composure. Ryu Iden used to be the best at numbing my reason, followed by Chaemin, but I might have to put Chaemin in first place.

Then, a melody suddenly caught my ear. …What, this is fresh. I instantly picked up the chords. The drunkard’s humming contained madness, but beyond that madness, I could vaguely see some raw gem.

Chaemin swayed, riding the rhythm. Rising madness.

“You and I! Die on the same day! You and I! Friends forever!”

The chorus is a bit crazy. Who wrote the lyrics? Go get them rewritten by Hyunjae.

I completely regained my composure and managed to put on a smile. Yeah, tear it all up. Let’s trust the power of a soundproof hotel room.

Holding my phone in one hand, it was hard to clap properly, so I tapped my thighs instead. Witnessing true madness. I discarded my past assessment of Seokjun as crazy. Chaemin is breaking several records today. It’s an honor on par with an Olympic medalist.

And finally, when the song ended, Chaemin’s expression suddenly became awkward.

“…Uh, but why am I so sober?”

Chaemin immediately grabbed a can of beer and chugged it down. Ah— how fun.

I pulled my smile up as high as it could go.

“That’s non-alcoholic, Chaemin.”

Chaemin froze.

Slowly, his hands trembled as he carefully examined the beer can. His eyes stopped at the alcohol content listed at the bottom. He read it.

I suppressed my bursting laughter and drank soju.

“…Wow, damn it.”

Chaemin muttered. He made fun of me so much for acting cute in Japan, but tomorrow morning, I’m posting a video of your embarrassing behavior in the group chat.

Ding, the sound signaling the end of the recording rang out, and Chaemin met my eyes with a face even redder than usual. I gave him the widest smile of all the smiles he had probably ever seen.

“D-Dong-hwa. Hit me in the head with a brick.”

As expected, he’s too kind, that rabbit. If I were him, I would have thought about hitting the person in front of me. I guess he can’t bring himself to hit a friend. But, what to do? Me neither.

“How can I hit my beloved friend? If you die, I have to die with you on the same day.”

Chaemin, upon hearing my words, seemed to recall the lyrics of the unknown song he had been singing earlier, and buried his face in his trembling hands, letting out an unidentifiable groan.

“Th-that’s, ugh, embarra, rassing.”

He snatched the soju bottle I was drinking from and chugged it down.

“Chaemin, you’ll die if you do that.”

I was surprised and snatched the bottle back, but Chaemin, who had already taken two gulps, glared at me resentfully.

“I’m, I’m, so serious, asking you to be my friend forever, how could you do this to me!”

After shouting that, Chaemin collapsed sideways.

* * *

After hearing my story, the team leader covered his mouth with his hand, trying his best not to laugh.

“You can laugh. I’m planning to reveal everything on the W app later anyway.”

“Cough, pr, prcough, no, but, so, what does this song have to do with that story?”

“The song Haemin sang back then stimulated my inspiration a bit, so I made this song.”

The team leader collapsed again, clutching his mouth.

“No, so, a song made on the spot by a non-alcoholic drunkard is planned to be an idol title track?”

It sounds very unhealthy when you put it that way, but it’s definitely a song of dreams and love, sung ‘drunk on friendship’ in a ‘non-alcoholic’ state, so it could actually be included in the Wizney OST [Original Soundtrack] without any issues.

“No, heehee, that’s, no, cough.”

The team leader laughed heartily and then took a long breath, as if he had calmed down.

I felt strangely excited and even showed him the video I had saved on my phone.

The line I’m currently working on is similar to the song Chaemin sang, yet different, and the team leader collapsed once again.

Even I was dumbfounded listening to it. How could Chaemin, who has no knowledge of composition, naturally come up with such a line? Is he actually a rabbit genius at composing?

Chaemin’s line, to put it simply, is a song that feels like a lonely autumn night, strolling through the streets, humming while drunk. How he managed to extract this atmosphere with no alcohol is amazing.

“So, what’s the title of this song for now? You put a working title on it, right?”

“Ah, that’s right. You’re curious, aren’t you.”

I looked away from the laptop and smiled. I came up with it, but it’s a very nice working title.

“*Tosa Myopheng* (兎死猫烹).”

“Isn’t that mean to abandon when it becomes useless?”

“That’s *Tosa Gupheng* (兎死狗烹) [a Chinese idiom meaning ‘to kill the dog after the rabbit is caught,’ or to abandon someone once they’ve served their purpose]. I changed the *gu* (狗) [dog] character to the cat *myo* (猫) [cat] character. So, *Tosa Myopheng*.”

“So what does it mean?”

“It means that when the rabbit dies, the cat must also die.”

So, it can’t be used as an actual song, but it’s perfect for explaining to Chaemin and tormenting him.

“Cough.”

The title was taken from the lyrics ‘You and I! Die on the same day!’ that Chaemin sang.

“Anihheeheek.”

He was more of a laughing type than I expected. At first, I thought he would be a very serious style, but after working together, he’s just a nice guy.

“Ah, I haven’t laughed this much in a while. I knew you guys had to be here.”

“Don’t you have TOT [Top of Top, a senior group] seniors too?”

“Maybe it’s because they’re up for renewal soon. The atmosphere isn’t always friendly. And the amount of time you spend at the company is incomparable to them, right?”

“…I think I’m special no matter how I think about it.”

“That’s true. I should ask Haejin to get you some new equipment.”

It’s still usable, it’s a waste.

“Don’t think that way. It’s all an investment. And you know very well that’s how capitalism works, right?”

Well, if everyone in the world used things until they were completely useless, capitalism wouldn’t have developed this far.

And then came the working time again.

Only the clicking sound and the music ringing in the headset were heard for a long time, and finally, it was time to finish. The team leader stretched out once and handed me a cup of coffee, asking when he had bought it.

“So, what’s your schedule for today?”

“Ah, I have to go with the members to watch the new Wizney Land movie.”

“Ah, you’re gathering with the families of the people involved before the premiere to watch it for a while?”

“Yes. So I think it’s okay to go a little shabby without having to take pictures.”

“Hey, some celebrities will come, you have to dress up.”

They say the most delicious food is the one that shows off the original taste of the ingredients without any seasoning. I think it’s okay as long as it’s not too rude.

When I finished working and returned to the dorm, everyone was already waiting for me, dressed to the nines. After the incident in Hong Kong, Chaemin would glare at me a little when he saw me, but today he was so excited that he forgot about it and ran over as soon as I came in, jumping up and down.

“Dong-hwa! Let’s go quickly. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a movie!”

“Well, you should watch a lot before you die. One of us has to follow when the other dies.”

“…Heuh.”

Chaemin went behind Seokjun and buried his face. Seokjun was the only one who didn’t laugh at the video, so Seokjun was selected as the rabbit hole that Chaemin was looking for. (For reference, Seokjun praised the video, saying the rhythm was amazing. Madness recognizes madness.)

“Change your clothes. I’ve prepared a semi-formal outfit.”

…What formal outfit?

“We’re not going to see reporters.”

Anyone who hears it would think we’re going to a banquet, not a movie.

“Hey, a really big actor is coming. It’s an advanced version of the social skills lecture.”

Ah, social skills. That damn ability.

“Ah, hyung-nim [older brother/male friend]. That person is coming. The person hyung-nim couldn’t guess in Japan.”

Who cares?

I sighed as I changed into the casual semi-formal outfit that Ryu Iden had prepared.

“I wish that person had seen our Japanese broadcast.”

“Then, wouldn’t Dong-hwa hyung try to die?”

“Oh, then it’s not okay. If Dong-hwa dies, I’m confirmed too…”

I chuckled at Chaemin’s absurd nonsense. Ah, that damn rabbit is stimulating my laughter too often these days, my cheeks are sore.

* * *

“Oh, hello, Blossoms.”

As soon as we got out of the car in the parking lot near the movie theater, Nesquick, who was inevitably wearing a dress, waved her hand as she got off the bus at the right timing. The fact that she can use public transportation wearing those clothes is amazing courage in itself. I respect her.

“Ah, F*ck. My father is coming today, I’m screwed.”

Nesquick muttered with a sigh.

“Your father…?”

“Yeah, guess who the chairman of the company that distributes this movie domestically is~”

Oh dear, I didn’t want to know about the blood ties of Korean society like this.

“I have a feeling he’s coming to see me. Damn it, if it weren’t for Soo-hyun, I would have run away too, but of all people.”

Ms. Soo-hyun is one of the actresses I got wrong on the Japanese show, and she’s talented enough to win the Best Actress award. Ryu Iden said that she is one of the few seniors that Jane has selected as respectable.

As we were having a small conversation, someone approached from behind as we entered the movie theater.

“So I grabbed Chun-gwang by the neck and hit his uvula…”

“…Can’t you do something about that vulgar tone, Chun-hee.”

A solemn voice. It sounds so dignified that it’s hard to point out the content. Nesquick scratched her forehead a few times, slightly annoyed by her real name being called after a long time, and turned around.

“Ugh, biological father, long time no see.”

Wow, it’s amazing to express the easy word ‘father’ like that.

“It’s hard to see my daughter’s face.”

“Huh? Was I a daughter? Not a rope tying entrepreneurs together?”

Wow, scathing.

I quickly grasped the chilling atmosphere and immediately stepped back. I can learn in advance what will happen if I get on the bad side of such a chairman without listening to Ryu Iden’s social skills lecture.

As I escaped as if running away, the other members were bowing to one person.

That person.

The person who was kindly accepting the greetings felt my gaze and momentarily met my eyes.

“Oh? A junior who didn’t know my face.”

Um, nice to meet you.