Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 176

176.

“Yes, Jinhan-ssi.”

“Heu, eu, bo, you remembered my real name, eu-eo.”

I’m sorry, but it’s not something to be touched by. It’s just easier for me to remember than to forget. Anyway, Ryu Iden’s advanced social skills lesson: when you’re not sure how to answer, smile.

Then Diki-ssi was startled again, bowing his head deeply before lifting it.

“Eu, it’s an honor! And congratulations on ranking 6th on the music charts. If I had your number, I would have sent you a congratulatory text message as soon as I saw you reached 6th place, but I’m sorry it’s so late.”

‘Crazy person.’ So, he’s been checking the music charts all the time. That’s a little scary. Jinhan-ssi, who casually threw out a very scary thing, hesitated as if he had something more to say.

“Uh, that, I, I have something to tell you! Can I have a moment of your time!”

Please take out some of the excitement at the end of your sentence.

“Ah, you can. I have plenty of time.”

“Th, th, separately for a moment!”

Oh dear. What on earth is he going to say? As I was panicking at the unexpected words, Mok-hwa grabbed Jinhan-ssi’s shoulder at the right time.

“Just go with him, hyung [older brother or male friend]!”

A younger sibling pushing his brother into a dead end—I didn’t raise him that way, Mok-hwa. Mok-hwa looked at the desperation in my eyes and whispered in my ear.

“He always says he wants to talk to you. If I leave him alone, he’s going to steal my phone and find out your number.”

This person is also swept up in madness. Damn it, why do humans have a bit of craziness in them? I lamented inwardly and picked up my wallet that was lying around.

“Then, I’ll buy you something to drink at the cafeteria.”

“Ah, th, th, thank you!”

“Oh? Dong-hwa! Want to come with us!”

I shook my head at Chae Hamin’s words. From the atmosphere, it seemed like he had something secret to say. Ha, why is it that the damn idol scene is never peaceful?

On the way to the cafeteria, Diki-ssi glanced at me, but didn’t say anything first. And I, according to my natural disposition, just walked along, thinking about what the material of the flooring might be.

‘…I want to run away.’

What is it? It feels like I’m going to hear a confession of murder. If it’s really something like that, I’m confident I’ll dial 112 [emergency number in South Korea] without hesitation, unless it’s Mok-hwa or our members.

Arriving at the cafeteria, I bought a cookie with nuts and Jinhan-ssi’s choice of tomato juice—I had a deep question about why he liked this drink—and sat down.

“Here.”

“Ah, thank you!”

Jinhan-ssi took out the straw, popped it in, took a sip, slurped, and drank. And then silence.

I tore open the cookie package, ripped it, took it out, and took a bite, crunch. And then silence again.

Every time the clock in my head told me that a second had passed, an unknown sensation welled up inside me. Ah, I want to run away.

“Excuse me…….”

Oh my god, we said the same thing. Murphy, the law you created wasn’t meant to be used in situations like this.

I ignored the flustered Jinhan-ssi and continued speaking, hoping to block the cliché conversation that would follow, like ‘Ah, you first!’, ‘No, you first!’

“Why did you call me?”

“Ah, I have something to tell you, eu, you know?”

Even someone who just woke up from a coma and is seeing this situation for the first time would know that.

“Th, th, uh.”

After dragging it out for a long time, Jinhan-ssi finally spoke.

“I know your identity, sunbaenim [senior/older colleague]!”

…What are you talking about?

I immediately frowned. It was a physiological reaction to something I couldn’t understand. First, without saying anything, I built up logic within myself. Something I’m hiding, something this person could discover, something my close people don’t know well enough to know the word ‘identity,’ and at the same time, something that corresponds to a flaw that I have to hide.

Um, have I ever killed someone? Or am I some kind of secret agent?

“Sunbaenim is!”

Me?

“That you’re Sinclair!”

Why is that a fact that deserves the word ‘identity’? I’m too stupid to understand.

Jinhan-ssi squeezed the tomato juice tightly. Strange red liquid dripped from the end of the straw. But Jinhan-ssi was so overwhelmed with intense joy that he didn’t even notice it, and his body trembled.

“From the first time I heard the song! I knew it!”

“Ah, yes.”

Even though I answered indifferently, Jinhan-ssi continued to explain without paying any attention.

“The beginning arrangement was strangely similar to the last beginning. It’s not self-plagiarism, but what should I say, that atmosphere! So I thought, ‘Huh?’ and when I listened and looked at it with that in mind…….”

A long, long explanation. At first, I was just listening quietly.

“So, I kept comparing this part with other songs, and comparing it again, and the synth arrangement here, and the drum beat structure…….”

More and more.

“Besides, I changed the atmosphere slightly around 3 minutes and 17 seconds, and the applause that came out at this time! A sample that doesn’t exist anywhere! I guess you recorded it yourself…….”

Scary. It’s scary. Isn’t this a little, shouldn’t this be a little scary? I barely maintained a stoic expression, but inwardly, I was unusually agitated. Even though music is a commodity, it’s my work. It’s considered an element that makes me up. But when I witnessed a human being in front of me analyzing that element so meticulously, I realized that there was something sticky underlying it.

……That looks very similar to the feeling Seok-joon gets when he talks about Wizney.

“So I came to a conclusion. S, sunbaenim, for us!”

Jinhan-ssi still held the tomato juice tightly in his hand and asked proudly.

“Sunbaenim is Sinclair, right?”

An expression that he had hit the nail on the head. It was an expression that could only be seen on someone who was confident that he had defeated his opponent in a debate.

Oh dear, I’m starting to feel a little resentful. It’s so good to see that expression collapse. It’s because I have a bad personality by nature.

So, I smiled.

“…Um, who is Sinclair? All I know is the name of a character in a novel.”

In this case, you shouldn’t say ‘no’. Because it means that you know the context of what the other person is saying. Besides, I didn’t lie. I never confirmed that it wasn’t.

And, although I haven’t seen Jinhan-ssi many times, in terms of purity, he’s slightly less pure than Chae Hamin, so.

“Ah… Ah ah, is that not it?”

He believes it so easily. The collapsing expression… um, it’s quite fun to tease. It’s a very satisfying reaction.

Anyway, it would be a lie to say no here, and I’m a person who feels guilty when I lie, so I can’t do that. Um, even though this friend looks innocent, he follows me quite a bit as a senior.

“I realized that Jinhan-ssi thinks more than he can tell anyone.”

I finished speaking, put the rest of the cookie in my mouth, and said goodbye. I hope he realizes it. Then it would be three times as fun to tease.

* * *

‘Ah, does that mean no……?’

I didn’t say no, but Jinhan’s brain felt like it was melting softly.

“What, what did you say?”

I’ve never thought that I’ve missed the context of a conversation in my life, but today, for the first time, I feel like I’ve met someone whose words I can’t understand at all.

‘More than you can tell anyone……. What does that mean? Is it some kind of code? Dong-hwa sunbaenim is from Korea University, so does he have his own code system?’

Countless hypotheses pouring in beyond the limits that the mind can accept. Jinhan pretends to be a slightly lacking person on the outside, but he is raising a snake inside. In the first place, in order to be a good leader of a group, you have to be strong on the inside even if you look weak on the outside.

‘He didn’t say no.’

My lawyer mother says that there can always be hidden intentions in sentences. Especially highly cleverly crafted puns are no different from the truth!

‘He didn’t say no, and he gave an answer that was obviously out of context…….’

The circumstances are gradually being organized in his brain. The context of the conversation is recalled in seconds, and Ji Dong-hwa’s reaction is recalled in seconds. If Ji Dong-hwa had looked into it, he would have said, ‘That’s creepy.’

In other words, Jinhan is just acting more stupid in front of Ji Dong-hwa, but his essence is a human being similar to a crocodile hiding in a swamp. So, a human being whose swamp is so deep that Ji Dong-hwa, who has a pretty good sense of people, is wrong.

That’s why he ponders deeply and repeatedly, and with that, his brain gets hotter and hotter.

And the conclusion he reached.

“…Ah, are you testing me?”

‘A brilliant talent like Dong-hwa sunbae might have given some kind of test in the conversation?’ The thought suddenly crossed my mind. Maybe this whole conversation is a kind of quiz.

Answers that raise questions often contain the meaning of resolving those questions. In most cases, people with higher learning deliberately say things that are likely to be questioned, and through that, they hope that the other person will grow. What if the conversation itself is designed to reach a certain conclusion, like a Zen dialogue in the East?

“…Ah, but I don’t know the answer.”

A sunbae who is difficult to get close to. No matter how you look at it, he’s a sunbae who is worthy of respect as a person, let alone being helpful in the entertainment industry. What are the conditions for getting close to him, a Zen dialogue? The difficulty is too high.

‘My sugar level is dropping……. That’s the problem when I use my head…….’

However, in the face of the scary wall of diet management, Jinhan writhed in pain, but soon realized that it was time to go back. And he put on a subtle smile again. The environmental sanitation worker who was cleaning next to him gave him a look as if he was going to see a crazy person, but he just smiled brightly and threw words of gratitude, saying that he was working hard.

And the next day, Jinhan gained confidence in his reasoning.

The emotion that was seen on Dong-hwa sunbae’s face when he received the first place trophy on the music show and gave his congratulations. Jinhan smiled and analyzed what that emotion was close to.

So, that’s.

* * *

Disappointment. Disappointing. It would have been more fun if he had noticed.

It would have been more fun if he had realized that what I said was a line from the novel Demian.

Well, looking at his innocent expression, I don’t think he would have thought about trying to figure out the intention.

“You shouldn’t tease innocent juniors, Dong-hwa.”

Chae Hamin muttered as he subtly dragged me away from Jinhan-ssi.

“You’ve become quick-witted, Hamin.”

It’s a shame that I can’t tease Chae Hamin as much as before because he’s become subtly sharp-witted, limited to the members. My hobby after knitting was teasing the members.

Excluding Seok-joon, who doesn’t realize he’s being teased, and Lee Hyun-jae, who has no room to be teased, it was fun to tease the other two, but the impact of teasing Chae Hamin has decreased slightly.

“Well, I can’t help but notice when you make a face like, ‘Ah, it’s a shame! I thought I could tease you more!'”

That’s a little scary, Hamin. Was what you learned tarot or mind reading?

“That’s right. That friend looks nice.”

Ryu Iden even joined in and nagged.

“Ah, Hoppindu will be nominated for first place next week. It’s in the top 10 on the music charts.”

……Um, wait, then who do I want to win, Hyun-jae?

Damn it, it’s not a philosophy class, but I’m facing a dilemma, damn life.