Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 315

Vacation.

After the concert, I received a week-long vacation. Originally, it was only a day or two at most, but I guess they were worried about fatigue.

Unfortunately, Mok-hwa is in the middle of promotions, so I don’t have a chance to go to the house I used to live in. I’m just sitting in the living room of the dorm, doing cross-stitch. Bong-ju is playing the piano; he even designed the pattern himself.

I should give it to him as a gift when I hear he’s won an award at the competition later.

“…I get anxious when I don’t work.”

Ryu Iden, who was lying lengthwise on the sofa that he had made me sit upright on, nodded his head. Why don’t you just lie down horizontally?

“Hyung-nim [term of endearment for an older male], you’ll hurt your neck.”

Seok-jun gently supported the back of Ryu Iden’s head. Ryu Iden smiled contentedly, as if he were more comfortable.

Humans can support their own necks, but why are you trying to deny being human?

“What to do, Dong-hwa hyung? I think I caught your workaholic disease.”

I answered, threading a new color of thread through the needle.

“You were always a workaholic.”

Maybe you’re worse than me, Iden. You’re still working now, actually.

“Should I turn on the W app [social media platform]?”

See? He’s squeezing his brain to try and work more somehow.

“As a group?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m fine with it.”

I nodded, organizing the thread.

Even though I turned it on once after the concert, it’s always best to access the W app and other applications frequently.

“Great!”

Chae Hamin bounced over cheerfully and placed his ambitious creation, a fried egg, in front of me with a thud.

During the week-long vacation, Chae Hamin is practicing frying eggs without burning them, with the right amount of seasoning, and half-cooked. It’s what Lee Hyunjae likes.

I took a bite. And since I can’t bring myself to throw food away, I stuffed the third fried egg into my mouth.

“I’ll eat it, Dong-hwa. You have a small stomach, too.”

It’s not that my stomach is small, it’s just that I don’t see the point in eating more than I need, Hamin.

And more than anything.

“This isn’t it, Hamin.”

It’s almost well-done and too salty. Let’s just appreciate that you managed to make one that wasn’t burnt on the third try.

“Ugh, I thought this one was a success…….”

Chae Hamin’s face was filled with frustration.

Like a master craftsman and his apprentice. If that were really the case, I would have thrown it on the floor. People at the company have compared me to a stubborn old man since a long time ago, but seeing this, I guess I can’t really be a master craftsman.

“Dong-hwa, I have a good idea.”

Ryu Iden, who had been quietly watching us, smiled slyly.

What is this crazy bastard up to?

“You have to explain the brick cushion, Dong-hwa.”

“…That’s right.”

Objectively speaking, it’s a very unusual incident.

“But is an explanation really necessary―?”

Seok-jun, who was still supporting Ryu Iden’s head, lowered it, probably because his arm was hurting.

Even though Ryu Iden didn’t have hands, he was as calm as if there were invisible hands supporting him with his neck strength.

“I have a doll I hug to sleep, too.”

It’s different.

There’s a significant difference. As much as the difference between an undergraduate and a graduate student.

Of course, I’m the undergraduate, and Seok-jun is the graduate student. If there were a school that specialized in teaching madness, I would still be a freshman.

“That’s it, then.”

The sound of clapping echoed.

Ryu Iden nodded at Seok-jun as if he understood and jumped up.

He was lying lengthwise on the sofa and then folded his body in half like a shrimp to get up; what kind of core muscles does he have…….

“An attachment cushion. Let’s explain it with that. Dong-hwa’s attachment cushion that he sleeps with every day.”

It’s different. The purpose is different.

What makes an attachment cushion an attachment cushion is its function. Just like how an hourglass and a digital clock are both clocks, you damn things.

“But Dong-hwa, you actually put that next to your head when you sleep, so it’s not wrong, is it?”

“Let’s take a picture, too.”

“Of what.”

“A picture of you hugging the brick tightly while you sleep.”

“…Reason.”

If I’m not convinced, I’ll find a way to screw them over.

“Eye candy for the fans.”

I clenched the needle once.

Ryu Iden flinched reflexively and then relaxed, saying, ‘What, it’s just a needle.’

In the silence, Lee Hyunjae, who was stretching as he came out of his room, chimed in.

“They’ll love it.”

“…A false image.”

“Selling is also an important virtue of an idol.”

Hyunjae, you don’t do things like creating a character.

In the first place, have any of these guys ever forcibly injected a certain image into the fans? Then they’re all disqualified as idols.

Lee Hyunjae smiled broadly.

“And sometimes, falsehood is closer to the truth, isn’t it?”

You’re a Korean literature major. As a philosophy major…….

“…That’s debatable.”

Lee Hyunjae sat down next to me slyly.

“And I know, you’re already done being persuaded by Iden hyung.”

A grin. An innocent smile.

“We’ll take pictures with you, too.”

Yes, this is what my tutoring student has become.

A human who is happy to death to see his tutor’s shame with his own eyes.

“…What’s the reason for the brick shape?”

I resigned myself. Actually, as Lee Hyunjae said, I was already persuaded.

“That’s up to you. I’m not good at fitting things like that together.”

“…Okay.”

On a precious holiday, we went into our respective beds and changed into our pajamas to show off staged shots on the W app.

* * *

[Brick cushion official lololololol]

Someone asked on the W app, and Iden said that it’s Dong-hwa’s attachment cushion that he made himself and is using lololol. He even carries it around during schedules.

This is a picture Iden secretly took when the members were sleeping.

(A picture of the members sleeping. They’re not actually sleeping, but their peaceful faces can only be seen as sleeping. Ji Dong-hwa is lying sideways on the bed, holding a brick tightly in one hand. Seok-jun has a doll, and the other two are empty-handed.)

Comments

―What is Dong-hwa even lolololololol? The more I see him, the weirder he gets.

└For real, when I first became a Blossom fan, I was watching self-produced content and laughing because of the leader, but then I got hooked on the Ji Dong-hwa and Seok-jun combination doing strange things in the corner.

└No matter how I look at it, Jun seems pure, and Dong-hwa seems to know everything and is crazy lolololololol.

―Fact revealed on the W app) Among the flower boys, the people who hug attachment cushions to sleep are Dong-hwa and Jun.

―But why is it brick-shaped lololololololol

└Ji Dong-hwa: Because the shape is stable. (Actually said)

└I was wondering when I first saw it, but after hearing the explanation, I’m even more confused…….

―He says he’s the most normal after doing this

└I really can’t believe this lololololol. Every time I see Dong-hwa being interviewed with that look in his eyes that doesn’t have an ounce of lie in it, saying, ‘I’m the most normal,’ I feel like I’m going crazy.

―How about a man who is polite, careful in everything, and has a better memory than anyone else, but carries a brick in his bag?

└Marry him.

Maybe if someone else saw me now, their eyes would be dying.

As if all life force had been exhausted, or as if I had lost the will to live, I would be looking at the screen with empty eyes.

I couldn’t quite understand this situation.

A meeting scheduled as soon as the holiday ended. He said it was a self-produced content planning meeting that goes up once a week. Why are they reviving the shame I worked so hard to suppress?

Besides, wasn’t the first content supposed to be decided by Lee Hyunjae’s wish ticket? What’s the connection between this post and a late-night debate?

“In this post, what should we focus on?”

I thought to myself. What, you damn PD [Producer].

“…Marry him?”

That’s not it. And I’m sorry to say, I’m a non-marriage advocate.

“Isn’t it Dong-hwa’s cuteness that he seriously thought about it and said the reason he feels attached to the brick is because of its stable shape?”

Shut up, you dog. There’s a limit to how much nonsense I can tolerate.

“Dong-hwa lying down and realizing it’s better than he thought, so he’s been holding a brick to sleep ever since that day!”

That’s not written anywhere there, Hamin. And it’s a secret that only you and I know, damn it.

Lee Hyunjae next to me almost spat out the water he was drinking.

Everyone’s attention is on me; get lost, I want to be alone.

“Dong-hwa’s cuteness is quite interesting, but that’s not the answer. It’s right here!”

PD Jung Kyung-woo was watching the meeting with a look of disgust.

I never thought I’d meet the welcome PD-nim [term of respect for a producer] and the PD bastard who makes me lose my temper in the same place.

Only the phrase ‘I’m the most normal’ remained, and the rest faded out and disappeared.

The phrase is getting bigger and bigger.

“I really thought a lot while looking at that statement. Who is the weirdest here!”

You. Without the slightest error, you.

“So I looked up the members’ past interviews. Everyone thought different members were the weirdest, right?”

The word ‘weird’ was enlarged on the screen, and inside the ‘ㅇ’ in the 받침 [batchim – Korean consonant in the final position of a syllable], it was written who we each pointed out.

“And the first content is, as Hyunjae-ssi wished, a world where he becomes the eldest hyung!”

Lee Hyunjae exclaimed cheerfully, ‘Oh.’

It seems like he’s excited because the long-standing tradition of the idol world called ‘maknae on top’ [the youngest member is in charge] is about to be realized.

Next page. The sentence ‘Role Exchange’ was written elegantly.

PPT [PowerPoint presentation], who made it? Why is it so readable and engaging?

“Then the conclusion is one. Let’s become different people!”

You seem excited, PD bastard.

“Hyunjae-ssi said Jun-ssi is the weirdest, but if he lives in the world as Iden-ssi, he’ll realize something else! About who is weirder! Because Iden-ssi chose Dong-hwa-ssi as the weirdest!”

Lee Hyunjae nodded in agreement with a smile, but the speed gradually slowed down, and he fell into bewilderment.

A head tilting in confusion.

‘Living like Iden hyung……, that’s…….’ Even if he didn’t say it out loud, all of Lee Hyunjae’s thoughts were revealed in his expression.

“For two days, Hyunjae-ssi will be performing Iden-ssi’s daily schedule, work, and all the tasks he has to do.”

The PD bastard smiled evilly.

When you make a wish, you must specify the conditions as precisely as possible. Otherwise, they might grant your wish in a twisted way.

In other words, that human wished to become rich, but he killed everyone except the wisher and the poorest person in the world and laughed, saying, ‘You’ve become relatively rich!’ Like a devilish human.

That bastard, he even tailored this PPT to fit. The purpose is to induce my shame.

He probably planned this content from the moment he heard Lee Hyunjae’s wish.

“Here, there’s a table specifying who will be whose role.”

The PD bastard cheerfully pressed the pointer button.

Iden → Hyunjae

Dong-hwa → Seok-jun

Hamin → Dong-hwa

Seok-jun → Hamin

Hyunjae → Iden

Oh my god, how can there be such a table? They’re all so incompatible.

“The most laid-back person becomes the most energetic person, and the cutest, ah, no.”

The PD bastard looked at Seok-jun and Chae Hamin once each, and when he said ‘cute,’ he looked at me. Get your eyes off me.

“If the most mature person becomes the most childlike person, they’ll be able to understand each other more deeply, right?”

“Wow, I’m older than Dong-hwa.”

“From now on, we’re going to have a meeting to become perfect versions of each other. We’ll be honest about our daily routines, check our usual values, and conduct personality tests. Please internalize everything! Otherwise, there will be a penalty!”

The PD bastard laughed with an expression that best suited the onomatopoeia ‘kya-ra-ra’ [a high-pitched, mischievous laugh].

In contrast, the members were desperately looking at PD Jung with the sentence ‘Can’t you stop that guy?’ filled in their eyes.

A head turning slightly; I know. That person probably tried to stop him as much as possible but failed.

“…What do we get for performing the best?”

“Of course, a one-time use ticket for the PD bastard. Unfortunately, you have to tell us your wishes in advance right now without time to discuss with the other members.”

The PD bastard and I smiled slyly at the same time.

The PD bastard is saying, ‘I refuse any tricks where you manipulate things to screw me over, no matter who wins.’

“For reference, the penalty is exactly as I imagined it. PD Jung tried to stop me, but I pushed it through.”

This time, it means, ‘Don’t even dream of giving Dong-hwa-ssi the victory.’

He’s really meticulous and thorough.

Even if he didn’t do it so meticulously, the members are serious about broadcasting, so they would do their best when competing.

“How is it? Does it pique your interest?”

A challenging gaze followed.

I have to make the dream I’ve had so many times come true now.

* * *

First day of filming, 1 PM, I woke up in bed.

Seok-jun usually wakes up around this time on holidays. Of course, I woke up at 6 AM, but I endured it with my eyes closed for about 7 hours.