Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 318

Just because it was predictable doesn’t mean it wasn’t mortifying.

That PD [Production Director, the person in charge of the show] probably predicted this situation well enough.

A person with picky tastes might find it hard to fall for something, but once they do, they become incredibly absorbed.

He started as someone who enjoyed delving into my personal information, but after taking charge of our self-produced content, he’s been trying to understand all the members, which is quite astonishing.

“Ha, life.”

I leaned back on the sofa.

The game was temporarily paused thanks to Lee Hyunjae, who couldn’t stand my disgraceful behavior and turned all sorts of colors.

Um, what is life? The pure white ceiling looks like paper and slowly sinks.

Isn’t it a bit harsh to live with the belief that we can look back on these accumulating days with a smile?

“Wow, what’s all this?”

Yoon Sungho sat next to me, smiling.

Um, a smile that makes me feel like I’ll turn into trash right away. A person with a twisted nature like me might be purified and disappear.

“So, you don’t have to act cute right now?”

“…Nope.”

“I was suddenly invited, and I wondered why, but the PD-nim was trying to embarrass you.”

The current penalty points can no longer be checked.

Seeing that it was covered up earlier than expected, he must have adjusted it to match Yoon Sungho’s arrival time, that bastard. He can’t stand seeing us subtly adjusting based on the penalty points of others, huh?

I remember the last penalty points, but the score difference between Ryu Ideun and me isn’t that big, so I might lose if I’m not careful.

Yoon Sungho seemed to notice the thick malice emanating from me and held my hands tightly with both of his.

“Hang in there, Donghwa. I have to leave quickly before the game restarts.”

A clear smile. An expression that says he’s ready to leave any number of times if I’m making things difficult for him. He lowered his voice extremely, as if conscious of the camera.

It’s for our own content, so it’s unlikely, but he was considerate so that there wouldn’t be any talk later about me chasing him out.

That’s why these types are difficult to deal with.

He’s different from Chae Hamin in nature. If a friend falls into a pit, Chae Hamin is the type to jump in and laugh alongside them, while he’s the type to make a fuss trying to pull them out with a rope or ladder.

“Stay longer.”

If I don’t treat a guest who came to visit properly, it’s just embarrassing. Acting cute is, doable.

Yoon Sungho seemed surprised and let out a short “Oh.” Then.

“It was surprisingly okay to see you acting cute towards me.”

A moderate joke.

“But I don’t want to push you too hard.”

Again, consideration.

However, if there are kind people like Yoon Sungho, there are also people full of malice.

“That won’t do, Sungho.”

“Hyung [older brother or male friend], what’s wrong?”

“We have to reminisce about our survival days, where are you going?”

Ryu Ideun smiled as he held out a cake (which Yoon Sungho bought as a housewarming gift) that he himself doesn’t even eat well.

So, you wanted to be number one too.

I gently held the doll that I’ve become accustomed to holding in my arms. If I put too much strength into it, Seokjoon will be sad, damn it.

“Our Jun was Sungho’s official sidekick during the survival show, it’s a memory.”

“I’m embarrassed.”

Listening to the real Seokjoon’s words, I put a little more strength into my hand.

“Um, this is good for the broadcast.”

Yoon Sungho put his right hand to his mouth and pondered deeply. Then, as if he came to a conclusion, he obediently took the plate.

“Ah, my conscience hurts.”

He tapped his chest with his fist while taking a bite.

There’s no need for your conscience to hurt. If you took the time to come, it’s rational to get the maximum benefit.

“It’s okay.”

“You’re too nice, Donghwa. You need to have some selfish sides like me.”

You’re always trying to find your shortcomings, Sungho. If you’re like that, where in this world would there be altruistic people?

* * *

—Wow, I was so surprised back then. Jun was crying his eyes out, and I didn’t know why. So, I sat next to him and waited for about thirty minutes?

The PD is nervous right now.

—But, oh my god, he stopped crying, so I asked him why, and he said he was preparing a song, and it was too sad.

—I’m embarrassed.

Ji Donghwa, who’s covering his face slightly as if he’s embarrassed? That’s not the Ji Donghwa I know.

Unless his soul has been switched, how can he be like that? I knew he had some talent for acting, but how!

He bit his nails.

A habit he only does when he’s extremely anxious and ominous, something that rarely happens in life.

“No, is it that serious?”

The senior who knows that is trying to say something to him, but he can’t even hear it.

“You don’t understand my heart, sunbae [senior/mentor].”

“…Are you going through puberty?”

It’s not like he’s a kid yelling at his parents and slamming the door, the senior muttered and habitually pressed the penalty button. It was obvious even to him, who was just biting his nails, that he hardly pressed the Ji Donghwa button.

“More thoroughly.”

“Huh?”

“I should have prepared more thoroughly. I couldn’t have done it with just two or three games.”

I can’t get away with just proving that he’s Seokjoon a few times. Considering Seokjoon’s character traits, I knew there would be some mistakes, but there are almost none.

He ruffled his hair wildly. He felt like he was going to throw up.

A future that should never have come is approaching.

“I really find you difficult, Dongwon. I want to beat you up.”

A celebrity who perfectly embodies the image he planned. An talent that you might only meet a few times in your PD life.

The mental training class heard the question, ‘Is this okay?’ countless times from the planning stage, but Ji Donghwa took it all in and even made it a hit in his own way.

A celebrity he wants to have on his show for the rest of his life, and someone he wants to come back and do shows with even if he does other shows.

The PD looked at his watch. The game’s end time was approaching.

“…Sunbae.”

“Yeah?”

“Right now, who’s in first place?”

“Donghwa-ssi [Mr. Donghwa].”

The world collapsed.

“Dongwon-ah.”

“…Yes.”

“Donghwa-ssi’s wish is for you to go on vacation for just one episode, right?”

“…Yes.”

“Is it something you have to do to that extent?”

The senior doesn’t know. How sad Ji Donghwa’s wish, which he devised in that short amount of time, is for him.

Why did he come back to the ranks of the seniors?

The reason he could endure the life of constantly being aware of Ms. Jang and listening to Mr. Jung’s nagging every day.

“For me, it’s something I have to do.”

Just a small reason to see the members, especially Ji Donghwa, suffering.

* * *

There are two types of people addicted to labor.

People who feel intense anxiety about the future and don’t feel comfortable resting, and people who fall in love with the fruits of their labor itself.

I’m somewhere in between, but the PD is clear.

Clearly the latter.

According to the staff, the PD finds joy in coming to work on weekends.

He comes up with hundreds of ridiculous ideas and then tells the team members to delete the absurd ones when they return.

He’s crazy.

“Hyung-nim [term of endearment for an older brother or close male friend]—, dream of me.”

“Okay, our Jun! Hyung’s leaving!”

I smiled brightly, acting up until the very end.

What is the reason for this suffering? To screw over the PD.

It was during the planning meeting for this self-produced content.

In the room to answer what I would do if I got the PD’s one-time pass right now, I pondered.

What is the most certain way to get revenge when I get the PD’s one-time pass? What is the thing that would damage his mental state the most?

1. Summon the PD into the screen and make him work like a dog. → Impossible. The very idea of the PD appearing on the self-produced content is strange.

2. Make him watch us live in luxury. → Not bad, but due to the nature of language, there will always be an excuse to escape, no matter how many restrictions are placed.

3. Therefore, the conclusion.

Rest for someone who loves labor.

I know how much pain it causes because I’ve experienced it myself, and I can completely eliminate any excuses to escape, assuming the restrictions are carefully set.

I check that Yoon Sungho is leaving, and my eyes are fixed on the clock.

“It’s over.”

The corners of my lips, which had been raised to see him off, slowly lowered.

I put the doll down on the sofa and sat up straight. I had been sitting in a haphazard position all day like a bum, and my body was about to twist.

“…It’s too scary, Donghwa hyung.”

Ryu Ideun was fed up with me, who had given up acting in such a short time.

Why isn’t your tone coming back, Ideun? Is that a declaration that you’ll gladly welcome the brick as soon as the camera turns off?

The member switch that started last night and continued until tonight, for two days in total.

Every moment, I’m paying attention to everything, what actions I’m taking, what expressions I’m making, so my nerves are quite sharp.

If anyone touches me first, I’m going to bite them like Lee Hyunjae today.

I connected the charger to my phone and admired Simba-ssi’s figure in the gallery.

Simba-ssi, give me strength. Especially in my fangs.

* * *

“Ah…….”

A sigh echoed in the PD’s office.

“Ah, ah, ah!”

The PD got up from his seat and grabbed his face.

He was arrogant. He thought he was good at teasing Donghwa-ssi, so he thought this would be enough.

Manipulating two games, easing the difficulty of the other members’ games, assigning Seokjoon to Ji Donghwa, and assigning Lee Hyunjae to Ryu Ideun to promote Ryu Ideun’s victory.

All the manipulative acts that the senior had intended to let slide were all collapsing like this.

“…Damn, he’s so vicious.”

“You’re the most vicious, you crazy bastard. Don’t you ever mention manipulation in front of me!”

The senior next to him was chattering noisily.

The PD, who had been burying his face and staying still, laughed a few times in vain.

Rest. Quit something so fun and rest for a week.

“We need to get an interview, should I do it?”

“…I’ll do it.”

No, I don’t think I can.

PD Jung thought to himself.

The junior’s eyes were gleaming like a madman. It looked like he would bite if touched right now.

“That won’t do! How can a senior use their strength for something like this? A junior should do it. And I.”

PD Jung realized once again.

This bastard, it’s really a situation where you shouldn’t touch him.

“I want to have a conversation with our Donghwa-ssi.”

Don’t smile. It’s scary, damn it. Why the hell do I have to come back to work after a long time and shoot another horror movie?

PD Jung could only grumble inwardly.

* * *

# Blossoms Self-Produced Content ‘Bluet’ Unedited Version

Ji Donghwa walks in front of the camera. It’s an interview conducted before hearing the victory results, but he’s triumphant. He smiled even more brightly, as if answering someone behind the camera.

A smile with a different texture than when he was Seokjoon. It was a little closer to danger than innocence.

—Nice to meet you, Donghwa-ssi.

—Me too, PD-nim [PD-nim is a respectful title for the Production Director]. I think I’ll be even happier when I see you next time.

A subtle remark.

The meaning itself is a greeting that says he’s looking forward to the next meeting, but now it was closer to a sneer that said, ‘Goodbye.’

—I like Donghwa-ssi so much, but Donghwa-ssi hates me so much.

A scissors mark came up in front of the camera. The PD had taken care of the editing point himself.

—As much as you cherish me, I cherish myself, so I wished for a break.

—Ah, what should I do, really. I might end up lying in a hospital room and watching today’s filming every day?

—I’ll definitely visit you, and I’ll buy you olives too.

A food that’s good for the body, but a fruit that traditionally symbolizes peace. It’s an implication that his life without you is peaceful.

The PD was silent for a long time beyond the camera.