Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 371

Seeing Lee Hyunjae and Mokwha talking so harmoniously filled me with an unbearable warmth.

In Ji Donghwa’s mind, it was like a scene of Mokwha, Simba, and Bongju playing together. [Simba and Bongju are likely pet names or nicknames, possibly for animals or people close to Ji Donghwa.]

“Wow, so you’re graduating soon?”

“Yeah.”

“What about graduation photos? What are you going to do?”

“They say I can wear a school uniform and take them with my friends when they’re seniors.”

I didn’t want to intrude on this beautiful scene, but I had no choice but to intervene.

“Hyunjae, have you eaten?”

If I had to choose the most important of life’s necessities, I would choose food without hesitation. They are all important, but food is directly related to survival.

Moreover, if clothing and shelter are provided at a reasonable level, humans even develop a desire for gourmet food.

“No.”

Therefore, let’s make a meal.

Mokwha and Lee Hyunjae seemed drawn to my voice and looked over.

Carnegie [Likely referring to Dale Carnegie, author of ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’] didn’t say such things, but regardless of East or West, it’s easier to win someone over if you appeal to their taste buds. There’s a reason why meals functioned as a stage for political negotiations in medieval Europe.

“Are you allergic to anything?”

I didn’t even know this. What were we doing in those past timelines?

“No.”

“What do you like?”

I didn’t know this either. What should I do? How could I have watched you for so long through a monitor and not even know what food you like?

“Nothing.”

It’s your fault, you damn Lee Hyunjae. Why don’t you have preferences other than books?

[I like braised spicy chicken.]

That’s probably because you made it for me, my lovely Donghwa.

How dare I introduce your memories when I’m trying to capture his taste buds for the first time?

Mokwha flinched.

“If you bother him when he’s like that, it gets annoying.”

“Oh, really? What state is he in?”

“Honestly, I don’t really know, but after he’s spacing out like that, he always does something eccentric.”

Such conversations barely registered.

I have to prepare a sumptuous feast. Wouldn’t he reveal one of these as his favorite?

If I create a chart analyzing his reactions and analyze his facial expressions in detail when he tastes it, I’ll be able to predict what food to prepare next without any awkward conversations.

Fortunately, I have ingredients I bought because Mokwha is starting her senior year of high school soon.

“We’re going to be stuffed today.”

We can’t leave any. It’s filled with my affection, so we can’t leave a single grain.

I have to serve a meal that would be perfect as a last supper.

[Adult jealousy seems to have an ugly side.]

……Hmm.

* * *

Growing up in a less than desirable home environment, I read books without any dreams.

If someone asked if I was happy, I would confidently say yes.

Unhappy families each have their own reasons, and there are also individual ways to find happiness within them.

Lee Hyunjae was immersed in books because he wanted to escape from his parents’ sharp gazes while still connecting with the world.

He couldn’t look his parents in the eye. His head was always bowed, or if that was impossible due to appearances, he would at least look at the area around their necks.

His childhood memories of his parents’ faces are not clear. After growing up, he hated seeing them so much that he turned his eyes away himself, and it was the same.

The mere thought that his parents would have clearly looked at him made Lee Hyunjae uncomfortable, so he delved further into books. He found comfort in a world only he could see, where they couldn’t see him.

However, sometimes he missed the connection of seeing and being seen. He wanted to feel the tension that reciprocity brought.

He missed the tension that came from sharing secrets and openly showing each other.

Why would the brother moving busily in front of him reveal such secrets to someone he had only known for a short time? It might not be wrong, but it’s not something to proudly show off to just anyone.

Pots, pans, ovens—all the tools were creating something. The series of processes was as natural as flowing water, so solid that it seemed like the plan was laid out in seconds.

It felt like watching performance art, beautiful cooking.

“…You’re used to it.”

Lee Hyunjae suddenly muttered. He was sure it was a rude mutter, so he immediately covered his mouth.

The sentence ‘Your parents are not here’ can be interpreted both positively and negatively, but I am becoming more and more convinced that it is the latter.

“Our brother is always responsible for my meals, so I can’t help but be used to it.”

Ji Mokwha, even though it’s our first meeting, blurts out secrets without a care.

…No, if there’s no intention to hide it, is it not a secret?

I watched his hand movements without interruption while talking with Mokwha. He’s an amazing person, starting with offering to help with my homelessness so casually, and I can’t help but be curious.

This is not good. The more you want to know someone, the more you have expectations and disappointments.

“First, an appetizer.”

Thump, thump, small bowls of porridge were placed in front of Mokwha and Lee Hyunjae.

It’s pumpkin porridge. This was a food that could be made at home. I thought that was the end, but something else followed.

“Chiljeonpan. Wrap it up and eat it.”

Please explain in more detail.

On one side of a long plate was a white dough that looked like naan bread I had seen in Indian cuisine, and next to it were vegetables of various colors. As the name appetizer suggests, it had a refreshing taste that whetted the appetite.

How do you wrap it and eat it?

“…Why are these ingredients at home, by any chance?”

Despite the question, Mokwha shrugged once. He had an attitude that he had no idea.

A human being that even his younger sibling doesn’t understand!

“I don’t know, it’s not the first or second time my brother has been weird.”

And again, thump, this time dongchimi [a type of radish kimchi], a winter radish kimchi, was placed on the table.

“I’m sorry, this is store-bought.”

No, wasn’t the gujeolpan [a platter of nine different delicacies] or whatever not store-bought? Why can he make such things? Even if you parted ways with your parents early, most people are just glad if they know how to cook rice, right?

Ji Donghwa didn’t pay attention to us and narrowed his eyes as if gauging the rate at which the food was decreasing. Since it’s an appetizer, it means there’s a main course, so he must be calculating when to bring it out.

I came all the way here because I wanted to know more about Ji Donghwa, but I have no idea what kind of person he is.

Mokwha asked how to eat it as if he was used to it, and Donghwa hyung answered while moving his hands as if he was also used to it.

I guess I’m the only outsider in this house.

Like watching a novel, just being seen.

Thump.

“This is the cola you said you liked. I was going to give it to you later, but.”

He held a cup in front of my eyes as if to cut off my 잡생각 [jap-saenggak, roughly translates to ‘ 잡 thoughts’ or ‘random thoughts’]. His eyes seemed to say, ‘Where are you running away to?’

When I met his eyes, it felt like my inner thoughts were being read through and through. I felt like I was being scolded for rationalizing that I was an outsider.

……Is this some kind of brainwashing?

Lee Hyunjae slowly reached out and grabbed the cup.

I took a sip, and it was strange. It was cool and tingling.

I never mentioned my favorite drink in that short meeting. He must have observed which one I reached for more often out of several options.

He was watching. Scary human.

“The main course is starting.”

“Oh, dessert after this?”

“Bansang [a traditional Korean meal setting].”

“I don’t know anything about Korean course meals, what is that, hyung?”

“It’s a meal. Rice and side dishes come out.”

He muttered like that and naturally divided the braised short ribs and placed them in individual bowls.

“Oh.”

And naturally, a small portion of japchae [glass noodles stir-fried with vegetables and meat] was placed on the table.

I know, there’s nothing as delicious as freshly made japchae for a Korean main course.

“This is a soup made with winter seasonal seafood.”

Wait a minute. The food keeps coming. The portions are small, but the variety is ridiculous. Most of it will be gone after one bite, but I don’t think I can eat this much.

“No, you’ll eat it all.”

“…Yes?”

Despite the question, Donghwa hyung turned around. Something was still boiling in the kitchen.

Looking closely, there was a dolsot [a stone pot] on the stove. It must be rice for the bansang. I have to eat that too. Wow, there’s also stew boiling next to it.

Lee Hyunjae then realized that he had chosen the wrong person to whine to.

* * *

……What, why is it all going in?

Lee Hyunjae realized his stomach size anew. Even when he touched his stomach, he had eaten more than usual, but there was no unpleasant feeling at all.

A precarious limit, just a pleasant fullness. The ability to exquisitely control the amount of food—what kind of hyung is he! Are there only such people at Korea University!

“Dessert.”

Ji Donghwa finally took out a small mango ice cream—this is also handmade, he says. He has long given up on being ordinary—and wiped the sweat that had formed on his forehead with a handkerchief.

Fortunately, he’s human. Physiological phenomena manifest.

Just when I had finished all the food and was feeling a little bored, warm food came out, so I suspected he might be some kind of machine.

‘A junior he met by chance was trying to sleep on the streets, so he made a windbreak out of boxes and tape, sincerely cheered him on, and then prepared this sumptuous feast……?’

What kind of story is that? Where did the plot go wrong? It’s so different from the general reactions you expect from humans that it’s bewildering.

Lee Hyunjae took a bite of the ice cream.

It feels a little rough, but it has a subtle sweetness. You could tell that it was made with care.

Ah, let’s give up. I’ve reached enlightenment.

Now I was ready to react with, ‘Wow! You can do that too!’ no matter what that hyung did.

But, wait a minute.

“……It’s quite funny to ask this now, but hyung, aren’t you eating?”

“I had a big lunch.”

“You didn’t eat much meat last time either, so that’s why.”

“Unfortunately, the quality of the meat was low.”

Then, he took out something like a bite-sized stick made by cutting cucumbers—I don’t know when he took it out—and dipped it in ssamjang [a thick, spicy paste] to eat.

The guilt is no joke. I’m eating dessert in front of the person who prepared the sumptuous feast, but he’s eating cucumbers.

It’s as apologetic as when you go to a restaurant and the staff is eating.

“The ssamjang I made.”

Then, he proudly held up the ssamjang 종지 [jongji, a small dish] to show it off. The expression on his face overlapped with the expression he had when he made the windbreak out of boxes, and I laughed.

He seemed to be appealing something and trying to show that ‘I’m a reliable senior,’ but he was completely off the mark.

This person would appear on a program like ‘I am a natural person’ if he went to a place like Gangwon-do [a province in South Korea known for its natural beauty]. No, he’s the kind of person who would tell them to turn it off if he heard the sound of filming. This person will become a real natural person.

The laughter kept leaking out. It was real laughter that burst out because it was so funny, unlike when other seniors spoke.

“You don’t have to feel too sorry. I’m going to eat it for breakfast tomorrow.”

Leftover 처리 [cheori, disposal]. Damn it, I’m making a senior who saved me from trying to sleep on the streets eat leftovers as a reward and laughing cheerfully in front of him!

Lee Hyunjae realized how far he had fallen.

Goodness, I’m just ordinary trash.

“So, what happened today?”

Thump, Lee Hyunjae felt like he was at a negotiation table.

Mokwha had disappeared somewhere. Donghwa hyung probably chased him away as part of his consideration.

If you’ve come this far, answer me. That’s what Donghwa hyung’s eyes said.

“My father hit me.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Thump, Lee Hyunjae heard the sound of the negotiation table folding. Ji Donghwa leisurely got up from his seat and brought back a cup of cocoa.

“Where are you going to sleep? There’s an empty room, but there’s only a blanket, and if you want a bed, you can lie down in my room. I can sleep on the blanket.”

Really the end? This is it?

I don’t know why, but a sense of disappointment welled up, and Lee Hyunjae was already moving his mouth without realizing it.

“…Can’t you listen more?”

“If you want.”

Then he immediately sat down.

‘……Ah.’

I think I know a little bit. In this person’s eyes, I look like someone he has to protect.

So he approaches sensitive topics as little as possible and tries to be as considerate as possible so that I don’t feel uncomfortable.

For some reason, Lee Hyunjae felt overwhelmed by that obvious fact and sat still.

He deliberately called me to sit down and suppressed emotions that he didn’t know how to define for a long time, calming his breathing.