Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 91

91.

After a crash course on the lore of Fruits World from Seok-jun, the second meeting with Nesquick followed. We decided the song’s theme would be ‘Love and Betrayal, and the Sorrow of the Mastermind.’

This was because the three of us—me, Seok-jun, and Nesquick—who were planning to participate in the songwriting, each chose a point we wanted to focus on within the context of Fruits World, which is ostensibly for children and enjoyable for the whole family.

For reference, Seok-jun chose love, Nesquick chose the sorrow of the mastermind, and I chose betrayal. Betrayal in a children’s cartoon—perfect for early education. In fact, according to Seok-jun, children who watch Fruits World briefly experience the harsh realities of society when a fruit that was close to the main character betrays them at the last moment.

And now, we and Nesquick are sitting around a round table in a meeting.

“Wow… with love, betrayal, and sorrow, there’s no reason for Wizney [parody of Disney] not to…”

Lee Hyun-jae brought up the most fundamental point. Smart guy.

“Oh, it’s all about romance! It’s about capturing the dreams and hopes of you all and me!”

Nesquick, wearing an extraordinary dress as always, replied. Well, classifying her as just as eccentric as Seok-jun would be appropriate.

“The sorrow of the mastermind filled with dreams and hopes…”

Lee Hyun-jae muttered, always saying the right thing even with a knife to his throat. The right attitude for an intellectual.

“By the way, Nesquick, how did you get into music?”

Chae Ha-min’s question. It seems he opened his mouth at an awkward time, compelled to say whatever was written in the script.

“…Oh, suddenly?”

Personally, I’m curious. What kind of process does one go through to be able to wear whatever clothes they want, ignoring all the gazes of others?

All we know is that Nesquick is a collection of fragmentary information: a woman in her mid-20s, a Wizney enthusiast, and a rapper.

“Wow, I expected it when they said I’d be on TV, but now that I’m about to say it, I’m embarrassed. I started music to screw over my dad.”

…Wasn’t there a camera just now?

“My dad treated his daughter like crap, so I thought, ‘Ah, screw it, I’m just gonna live however I want.'”

I quickly scan the ceiling. There is a camera.

And, although it’s a prejudiced thought, it doesn’t seem like something you’d say while wearing a dress.

“Ah… talking about the old days makes me want a cigarette.”

…What is this, really? Today, I realize once again that the Republic of Korea is much more open than I thought.

“My dad basically thought of his daughter as someone to set up for arranged marriages, which was a bit of a pain in the ass.”

Nesquick smiles as she says that.

“At first, I just wanted to do it casually, so I named myself after the Nesquick [chocolate milk powder brand] next to me, but somehow it became too serious? You never know what life will bring.”

I look at Ryu Iden. The expression on his face is impressive, as if he’s encountered something distant, beyond the abyss. The disharmony of clothing, expression, and language constitutes the confusion in Ryu Iden’s head.

Lyotard, known as a propagator of postmodernism, said that humans feel ‘sublime’ when they see an object they cannot reconstruct in their heads.

…She’s an incredibly sublime human.

“Anyway, the head of a corporation only thinks of his daughter as a tool to merge families, so, screw it, I just ran away from home and am doing music. To be honest, I want to kick my dad in the ass and XXX him.”

* * *

HBS [broadcasting station] music show waiting room. It’s a bit small, but it’s fortunate that we can use it by ourselves.

“Dong-hwa hyung, wanna go to the convenience store with me?”

Ryu Iden is probably going to get the red ginseng juice here. I look around once, confirm that all the members are getting their makeup done, and get up from my seat.

“…Nesquick was amazing.”

Ryu Iden mutters as we walk to the vending machine together. Not just amazing, but sublime.

“Wearing a dress, looking for a cigarette, and swearing… that was really amazing.”

Ryu Iden’s eyes are consumed with anxiety. The eyes of a leader worried about whether they can go on air.

Unfortunately, Nesquick’s past was too colorful to broadcast.

“The daughter of a large company president, Wizney dress, cigarettes, swearing…”

Constant muttering.

“Ha-min is also the son of a corporation.”

“…That’s not surprising, but why is Nesquick surprising? Is it because Ha-min has an air of nobility?”

I don’t know where that rabbit has elements that can be defined as ‘nobility,’ but if the leader says so, then so be it.

We arrived at the convenience store. Ryu Iden buys a red ginseng juice, and I buy three small cookies. Hmm, fortunately, there are exactly three left. Very lucky.

“Oh, what’s with you buying snacks for once?”

“…Mok-hwa was curious about the cookies here.”

I don’t know what she heard from senior singers, but she’s curious about the strawberry jam cookies here. Anyway, it’s cute to think about her enjoying them.

“Oh, a filial son?”

“…The order of the words seems to have changed a lot, but.”

On the way back.

“Oh, Dong-hwa! What are you doing here!”

Someone ran up and tried to give me a piggyback ride. And I, who can fight with paper due to physical weakness,

“Oh, oh, oh?!”

naturally collapsed.

Rustle.

“…Hey, uh, um, hey, mi, sorry, Dong-hwa!”

I turn my head to check the face. A gentle-looking face, Yoon Sung-ho.

“This, like, um, I do it often to Ho-yeon, so I didn’t think you’d collapse like a sandcastle, like, uh—”

Not a single sentence is properly constructed. More than interpreting that, I was curious about what caused the ‘rustling’ sound when I fell.

I stare blankly at the cookies in my hand. All, broken. All three. Mok-hwa.

Yoon Sung-ho, who followed my gaze, is shocked for the second time.

“…Did you buy strawberry jam cookies?”

“…My younger sibling wanted to eat them.”

“Whoa.”

Yoon Sung-ho, who exclaimed those two letters loudly, quickly runs to the convenience store, then collapses. Of course, there won’t be any left. Ryu Iden bursts into insane laughter at that moment. You bastard.

…Damn, if this can be called fate, I’m going to curse it.

Yoon Sung-ho returns with heavy steps, fidgeting in front of me as I get up.

“…I’m really sorry. What should I do? Do you come here next week too?”

“…Um, probably.”

Damn, I should cancel the words that I’ll give it to her for a while today.

I take a deep breath. Only then do I calm down. It’s been a while since I’ve been flustered by such a trivial matter.

Only after calming down did I realize that Yoon Sung-ho wasn’t alone.

“Ho-yeon.”

I called his name as a sign of greeting. Ryu Iden is still laughing beside me.

Ho-yeon, who was seriously scanning me, looks pitiful.

“Dong-hwa, you’re too weak.”

…I want to ask if he’s ever thought that he’s terribly strong, tiger.

“I guess I was thinking too much based on Ho-yeon’s standards. I usually do it often, so…”

You set the wrong standard, you damn tofu. What’s the difference between that and the logic that there’s no reason to live if you look at humans from the perspective of the universe?

“Anyway… sorry… I’ll definitely buy it next week.”

After a brief commotion, we sat at a table near the convenience store.

“Are you going to do follow-up activities this time?”

“Ah… that’s.”

While Yoon Sung-ho is thinking about how much he can tell outsiders, Ho-yeon opens his mouth as if nothing is wrong.

“Lee Ji-hyun did drugs, mmm.”

Yoon Sung-ho’s quick hand covers his mouth. We already know that fact, so it doesn’t matter.

Anyway, what’s the connection between Lee Ji-hyun and the other members doing drugs and the follow-up activities being carried out?

With a slapping sound, Yoon Sung-ho awkwardly pats Ho-yeon’s back.

“Our Ho-yeon! Is good at everything! But sometimes his mouth is too! Excessively free!”

After a commotion subsided to some extent, Yoon Sung-ho quietly started talking in a low voice.

“Ha… you remember me saying that our group atmosphere was a bit strange last time, right?”

I nod lightly.

“That’s… it’s been resolved somehow, but Lee Ji-hyun, she made a bit of a big mistake, so it was resolved. Besides, everyone except me and Ho-yeon are involved.”

I nod.

“So, externally, Lee Ji-hyun is the leader, but internally, within the company, I’m the leader, which is a strange situation? The kids are all avoiding Lee Ji-hyun, so it’s a bit… like bullying.”

Oh dear, wearing a hat [being in a difficult position]. He’s in the situation that humans should avoid the most. Looking at him making a pitiful expression while saying that, I think I know why being kind is similar to being stupid. It’s a part to understand that he’s in a situation where he should judge and act rationally, not sympathize.

“So, the company is having a follow-up schedule a bit hastily because the kids are depressed, so they can make up for their mistakes and get a boost in performance before the end of the year. I was so busy that I couldn’t even talk about it.”

Yoon Sung-ho says that with a faint smile. There’s a heavy sense of responsibility smeared on that smile. …Thinking about it, it makes sense.

“Besides, this time… there’s even a minor among the kids who caused the trouble. Ha… I really want to swear at them all, but I’m holding back. Why aren’t there any kids who are in their right minds?”

“That’s why I’m doing it, Sung-ho.”

“You should reduce it a bit, Ho-yeon-ah…. Anyway, ta-da, that’s what happened!”

Yoon Sung-ho smiles and spreads his arms wide, showing off a bright smile like the sun. After that, Ho-yeon comes up and spreads his arms wide with him, only repeating the word ta-da with a blank expression. …Is the only guy who can be called sane among the humans I met today only existing in the mirror?

“Anyway, I have to try to the end! Even if they’re idiots, can’t they be recycled?”

Unfortunately, human nature does not change easily. So, rather than recycling garbage, it may be best to hide the garbage as much as possible and tie it up in a bag.

However,

“…It’ll be possible.”

How can I look at a human being who is doing his best, a human being who has hope, and tell him to give up in front of his eyes?

Therefore, I must be by Yoon Sung-ho’s side by constantly cheering on Yoon Sung-ho’s challenge, and as a heavy-mouthed ear that listens when he has a hard time.

Instead of taking Lee Ji-hyun’s corruption as a weakness and suppressing her, maybe, this is how I take responsibility.

“Yeah! That’s right! Thank you for cheering me on,”

Yoon Sung-ho smiles so brightly.