Descent Of The Demon Master [EN]: Chapter 146

Grasping (2)

I’m recording this. So I don’t forget.

Looking back, Hak-cheol didn’t show signs of madness at first either. In the beginning, he was just suffering from excessive anxiety. But as each day passed, Kim Hak-cheol went mad.

Won’t I be the same?

If I can’t escape his grasp, I will go mad too.

Day by day…….

The reason I record this is to prevent myself from going mad, to see if today’s feelings and today’s mood are different from tomorrow’s feelings and tomorrow’s mood.

Even if I am slowly going mad, I believe that if I look back at today’s record, I will be able to regain my sanity.

Tonight, that bastard will come for me again.

I was sure of it yesterday.

That bastard has no intention of killing me. At least not yet.

If he had wanted to kill me, he could have done it anytime. With that devilish bastard’s abilities, it wouldn’t be difficult for him to kill me and not even leave a corpse behind.

The reason he doesn’t kill me is simple.

To enjoy it.

I was sure of it when I looked into his eyes yesterday.

As he said, he’s not acting out of some petty sense of justice. Whether I repent or not is of no concern to him. He doesn’t want to make me repent; he just wants to torment me because I’m an eyesore.

He told me.

We are the same kind.

Maybe he’s right. No, he’s right.

He told me that he had only restrained my body, but I had restrained people’s minds.

That I slowly drive them to the point where they can’t resist, even though they could, and that I enjoy the process.

When his low voice drove me, I couldn’t help but feel it.

This must have been what Joo Young-gi, and those who had looked at me like I was a devil, felt.

And then that bastard crushed my body.

Having to endure the breaking of every bone in my body without even being able to scream was literally hell.

It’s like seeing hell while still alive.

Tonight, that bastard will come again.

I have to find a solution before then.

If what he said is true, I only have a week.

If I don’t find an answer within that time, I will end up like Kim Hak-cheol.

I will never let that happen.

That’s why I record this.

After a day passes, I will look at this record again. I will look at it again and again, and I will never lose my sanity.

If I can endure a week or find a solution within a week, then I will be the victor.

Day two.

I want to talk to someone.

A week.

How long a week is.

Just waiting, a week that passes in the blink of an eye feels so long and unbearable.

I pray that time will pass quickly, but I’m so afraid of the night that will inevitably come that I pray time will stop.

I’m still sane.

I’m not crazy.

But in other people’s eyes, I must look crazy.

I had a seizure when I saw the sun setting.

That bastard Sang-yeop started staring at me with strange eyes. The company commander also came to me and asked what was wrong.

What’s wrong?

Would they understand if I told them?

Would they even be able to comprehend what’s happening?

Hak-cheol fought against this loneliness.

I am clearly fighting against a demon who comes to me, but others just think of me as a madman. That gaze is so unbearable.

I can’t endure this. I need to come up with a plan, and to do that, I need to know my enemy.

But today, Kang Jin-ho looked at me as if he didn’t know anything. The squad members of the 3rd squad, who felt that I was going to do something to him, blocked me.

Crazy bastards.

Do they even know that they are protecting a demon?

It’s night.

I can’t sleep.

I’m scared.

Day three.

I called my father.

I have to escape this place.

Deep down, I thought I could endure it. I was confident that my mental strength was extraordinary, no matter how cruelly he tortured me.

And now?

I understand why there are defectors during wartime. If that devilish bastard were to torture someone, there would be no independence activists or pro-democracy activists in Korea [referring to historical figures who resisted oppression].

No, they would be better off.

Because they have something to fight for and a secret to reveal. They have the hope that they can be freed from pain if they just talk about it.

But not me. He didn’t want anything from me. He just watches me slowly break down with interest.

That’s what drives me crazy.

The company commander, seeing my condition, quickly decided to have me admitted this time.

Four days later, four days.

My heart is already shrinking just trying to endure one day, and you’re saying four days?

Four days?

I’ll be dead by then, you bastards.

I yelled at my father to get me out of here right away. That old man asked for a reason, but if I told him the truth, he would call me crazy. He would tell me to get a grip.

He always has.

He never easily solves trivial matters, but he has never once provided real help when I really needed it. What can I expect from such a person?

I don’t expect understanding.

What I want is to escape this place.

Right here!

No matter how skilled Kang Jin-ho is, he won’t be able to chase me outside of this place.

I am…….

I’m still sane, I am.

Day four.

I threw up while washing my face.

I grabbed my head to stop the dizziness, and clumps of hair fell out.

I’m dying.

Dying.

I’m so afraid of the night coming.

That demon is crushing me.

Just making eye contact feels like my soul is being torn apart.

I wish the torture time would come sooner. At least then I wouldn’t have to tremble in fear.

I realized that the fear of the mind can be greater than the pain of the body.

Was Young-gi like that too?

Is that why he committed suicide? He would be at peace.

At least if I die, I won’t have to meet that demon again tonight.

I can’t forget the sight of him laughing maniacally after sticking needles under my fingernails.

Today too.

I meet that demon again today.

Today too…..

While I was writing in my notebook, I unknowingly attacked and bit Sang-yeop, who had put his hand on my shoulder.

I don’t even know why I did that.

Maybe it’s because of that devilish bastard who likes to whisper behind my back. The moment a hand touched my shoulder from behind, I felt the fear of death.

Okay.

Let’s admit it, I have to admit it.

I’m going crazy.

Day by day, I’m going crazy and dying.

I’ll probably go even crazier tonight.

No.

I’m not crazy. I can’t be crazy.

I’d rather kill that bastard than end up like Kim Hak-cheol. I can just kill him.

I’ll die if I don’t kill him, I’ll die if I don’t kill him…….

But is dying a bad thing?

If I die, I’ll be at peace, so why is dying bad?

No.

Get a grip, Noh Soo-bong.

If I die like this, it will just be a dog’s death [a meaningless death].

Instead of running away, I should bite back. I have to stab that devilish bastard in the heart.

Day five.

Scratch, scratch.

Can a human hear the sound of their own bones scraping?

The sound I heard last night hasn’t left my ears all day.

A scratching sound.

As if a bug had crawled into my ear.

Scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch, scratch.

The sound doesn’t stop.

The sound…….

I tried to stab Kang Jin-ho with a knife I stole from the kitchen.

I tried to kill him. I couldn’t kill him in the end because of the guys who stopped me.

Is that really true?

Did I really not kill him?

When I approached Kang Jin-ho from behind with a knife, the thought that came to my mind was fear.

What if I kill Kang Jin-ho and that demon comes back?

I’m not afraid of killing Kang Jin-ho for no reason.

What I’m afraid of is that if that demon wasn’t Kang Jin-ho, there would be no way to stop him from coming again. I’m so afraid of confirming that fact.

Scratch, scratch.

The sound of bones scraping in my ears.

I know.

I’m already crazy.

There’s no need to understand it. I can tell just by the sound in my ears and by looking in the mirror.

There’s a monster in the mirror.

That’s not me. That’s not me.

A hideously distorted face, half of my hair fallen out, and hollow eye sockets.

It’s not the face of a human. Only after smashing the mirror could I get rid of the terrible hatred a little.

I have to run away.

I have to escape from that demon.

Five days have passed now. If I can endure for two more days, I can find freedom.

But I’m running away.

I’m escaping.

Because I know.

If he is the same kind as me, he will never value promises. Rather, he will make a promise and then break it, laughing and enjoying my despair.

The only way for me to survive is to get out of here and hide where he can’t find me.

Otherwise, he will never let me go.

He is….

He is more devilish and more cruel than anyone else.

I have to get out of here.

I have to escape.

I want to live.

The sun is setting.

I had a seizure when I saw the sun setting. The contents of my stomach were spewing out uncontrollably, and my tears and snot wouldn’t stop.

I’m scared. I’m scared.

I’m so scared that I have to meet that demon again.

I think I know why Kim Hak-cheol hanged himself.

It wasn’t because of the pain.

It was because he was so scared.

It was because he was so afraid of the night coming and having to meet that bastard again, of having to become that demon’s plaything, that he couldn’t bear it.

He was so scared, so…….

Day six.

I’m going on leave.

My father pulled some strings, and I was finally able to go on leave.

I’m getting out of this place. Out of this place.

I’m getting out of that demon’s grasp.

I am…….

I’m not coming back.

I’m going to go somewhere he can’t find me and hide forever. Somewhere no one is.

No one, no one…….

Some place where no one is.

I’ll hide at the end of the world so he can never find me again.

I’ll do anything to do that.

Kang Jin-ho slowly closed the notebook.

A black sedan leaving the parade ground came into his view. Kang Jin-ho stared at the sedan with emotionless eyes before slowly lifting the notebook.

Whoosh.

The notebook in his hand slowly burst into flames.

Joo Young-gi’s notebook, Noh Soo-bong’s notebook… there’s no need to leave them in the world.

But his meaning would be different.

Joo Young-gi’s notebook was destroyed because he couldn’t accept them being judged within the soft boundaries of the law. But the reason for destroying Noh Soo-bong’s notebook is completely different.

Noh Soo-bong’s notebook will be useless now.

An object that has lost its purpose has no value.

If the notebook exists to prevent Noh Soo-bong from losing his mind by reading it, then after tonight, it will no longer have that value. Because he will no longer be able to read anything.

Kang Jin-ho brushed off the ashes on his fingertips and smiled quietly.