In This Life, I Will Die As An Actress, Not As A Villainess [EN]: Chapter 89

As soon as he said that, the eyes of the sound director, rumored to be from Canada, widened as if they’d pop out.

“Director…? We can’t record in this weather! We have to record all the lines separately. And this is such a crucial scene!”

However, Director David was unyielding.

“I’m sorry, but please understand.”

The director strode away.

The sound director looked utterly defeated.

The director of photography sighed and instructed the crew to move the equipment.

There were only two scenes scheduled for filming today.

‘Bella running out of the house after a heated argument with Emily on a stormy night’ and ‘The scene where the three have a conflict over the move after returning to find Bella, who ran away from home’.

I headed to the set, determined to be extra careful today to avoid any more NGs [no-good takes or mistakes].

Normally, I’d get my makeup done in the makeup trailer and then go to the set, but it was clear I’d get soaked moving between them. So, I decided to use the upper floor of the set instead.

As I entered the set and started getting my makeup done, I felt a knot of nervousness tighten in my stomach because of the weather.

The sky continued to rumble ominously.

After a hurried makeup session, I went down to the first floor and stood with Aiden in front of the dinner table that the crew had prepared in advance.

Chloe, who had just arrived, came over too.

I smiled and waved at Chloe, who greeted me brightly.

Then, I deliberately avoided looking at Chloe’s face again until I sat down in the chair.

I needed to build up my emotions internally.

I calmed myself and sat down at the table.

“Ready, action!”

I deliberately placed the fork I was holding down on the table with a clink.

Then, looking at Bella, who was listlessly picking at her food, I asked, “Why are you telling people you were adopted?”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“…….”

At her response, I bit my lip slightly, as if overwhelmed by emotion.

Personally, this scene was deeply connected to Emily’s trauma, the character I was playing.

In Emily’s mind, her childhood experiences with racism were deeply ingrained.

“People look down on you!”

“That’s what you think, Mom.”

Emily was worried that her own daughter would face the same prejudice, but unfortunately, Bella felt her mother was being overbearing.

“Bella, I’m worried. I’ve seen things…”

“What?”

I hesitated for a moment, searching for the right words.

“Do your friends tease you for being Asian, for being adopted?”

“…No.”

“I saw it. On the way home, your classmates were teasing you.”

“Please!”

Bella couldn’t take it anymore and raised her voice.

I matched her volume.

“I’m the one who’s saying, please! If something like that happens, you have to tell me. Why don’t you tell me? Why are you hiding it?”

“It’s because Mom is like this! Why do you always see my friends in a bad light?”

“Are they your friends? Are they really your friends?”

“I want to get along with them. It was just our joke.”

“How is that a joke!”

Finally, I lost my composure and shouted.

“Mom doesn’t know jokes.”

Bella retorted, refusing to back down.

“What?”

I frowned, as if my thought process had momentarily stalled after hearing those words.

“You’re always so serious. You only get angry. It’s exhausting.”

Those words were the last straw. I slammed my fist on the table.

“Bella!!”

Sean shouted from the side.

“Emily!!”

Bella, unable to contain herself, jumped up and ran out.

As Bella flung open the front door and disappeared outside, Sean hurried after her.

A torrent of rain poured in through the open doorway.

I stared blankly at the door Bella had vanished through, then snapped out of my daze and stood up.

The chair crashed to the floor as I scrambled to my feet.

I grabbed an umbrella and ran out, chasing after Bella.

The rain was coming down so hard that it stung my eyes.

I could make out faint silhouettes moving in the distance.

I hurried toward them.

While running, one of my water-soaked shoes slipped off.

Emily and Sean were standing on the side of the road, where cars were whizzing by.

I quickly opened the umbrella over Bella’s head.

Then Bella said, “I want to go back to the orphanage.”

The rain intensified, as if it would tear through the umbrella.

A moment of heavy silence hung in the air, then suddenly Chloe burst into tears.

Aiden and I were taken aback and sat down, looking at Chloe.

“Cut!”

The director’s surprised voice broke the silence.

Chloe couldn’t control her emotions and sat down, sobbing.

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to cry, but I can’t stop…”

Looking at Chloe, I bit my lip tightly.

I couldn’t readily comfort or hug her.

If I did, all of this momentum and raw emotion would be shattered.

For all three of us.

I was so upset.

No, Han Sena. [Referring to herself, reminding herself to stay in character]

I struggled to compose myself and turned away from the crying Chloe.

* * *

About thirty minutes later.

I was sitting alone in the corner of the set, listening to the relentless rain.

My eyes were closed, trying to maintain the emotional intensity.

Then a staff member came in and said, “We’re going to start filming again.”

I got up and headed back to my mark.

The rain showed no signs of letting up.

In the distance, I could see Chloe, who had calmed down slightly.

I approached her.

“Do you need some more time?”

The assistant director came over and asked.

Chloe, Aiden, and I all shook our heads.

We were all trying to recapture our emotions while resting.

“Okay. Ready, action!”

I held the umbrella over Chloe’s head.

Then Chloe transformed, her expression shifting as she became Bella again, and she said, “I want to go back to the orphanage.”

I looked at Chloe, listening to her words, without saying a word.

“I hate everything. Mom, Dad, this old house, this cramped neighborhood. I was more comfortable when I was in the orphanage!”

Each word Bella hurled at me struck my heart with more force than when I had read it in the script.

So vulnerable.

So, this is what it feels like to have a daughter.

Without a word, I handed Bella the umbrella and turned away.

I walked slowly along the side of the road in the rain.

My eyes were empty.

The cold, wet asphalt touched the bare foot that had lost its shoe.

A scene where I simply walk, without any lines or actions.

However, this scene was the moment where Emily’s emotions reached their peak.

After walking for a while, the other shoe came off.

But I didn’t have time to think about it.

I closed my eyes, raised my head, and walked slowly in the rain.

Numerous raindrops gathered on my face and streamed down.

“Cut, okay!”

I heard the director’s okay sign from afar through the megaphone.

As soon as I heard that, I stopped walking.

I could hear the staff running toward me.

Then the tears that I had been holding back finally burst forth.

Tears that I could never show in front of Bella.

Emily was a mother who never cried in front of her child, whether from worry or hurt.

It was so hard to protect Emily’s heart.

My body was even trembling from the cold.

As I sank to the ground, a staff member rushed over and held an umbrella over me, wrapping a blanket around my shoulders.

* * *

Back inside the set.

Barely managing to regain control of my emotions, filming continued.

It was the toughest filming I’d done recently.

Emotionally and physically draining.

The house where the three of us returned was a mess. Water was pooling in the living room where the ceiling was leaking.

Rainwater streamed down the stairs from the roof, which hadn’t been properly sealed.

The bottom of all the furniture was soaked.

Without realizing it, I stepped onto the living room floor with my swollen feet.

Bella and Sean stood in front of the front door, not coming in, as if they were in shock.

I went to the kitchen and grabbed a rag.

Then I squatted down and started scrubbing the floor.

The rag quickly became saturated.

I chanted softly.

“We have to leave…”

Sean looked at me with a bewildered expression.

“We have to leave here! Right now!”

I threw the rag down and shouted.

“We have to leave, we have to leave here. We can leave.”

I muttered like a crazy person and jumped up.

Then I grabbed Bella’s wrist and headed toward the car in the backyard.

The camera crew followed right behind us.

I pulled Bella toward the car, but the door wouldn’t open.

I hadn’t brought the car key.

As I struggled with the doorknob, Sean came from behind and stopped me.

I shook off his hand and finally screamed.

“We have to leave!!!”

“Cut……. Okay.”

As soon as I heard the director’s cue, I collapsed again.

This time, I was hugging Chloe.

I held her tightly, trying to release the lingering emotions.

“I’m sorry, Chloe. You know this is acting, right?”

Chloe burrowed into my arms and nodded.

She sniffled, as if she was about to cry again.

Both of us were shivering from the cold.

Sean came over and hugged both of us.

All three of us were soaking wet.

Although our bodies were as cold as ice, a sense of warmth was rising in our hearts.

My mind began to stabilize, little by little.

* * *

Meanwhile, in front of the monitor.

The sound director was complaining to Director Raymond.

“Because of you, Director, we have to re-record all these good lines! How are we going to recapture these emotions?!”

Director Raymond apologized sincerely, his expression serious.

“I know, it’s all my fault. I’m so sorry. But…”

Raymond looked at the three people on the monitor.

He stroked his prickly beard, lost in thought.

He had the illusion that an invisible, transparent thread connected the three of them.

The three were in conflict as they struggled to become a family, but their appearance together already looked like any other family.

Even the director hadn’t anticipated this.

‘How can they have such chemistry after only 3 days of filming?’

I didn’t show it because of the filming schedule, with important scenes arranged in front of me, but I was quite edgy.

In addition, I was subtly distracted by the articles that created a rivalry with Warners [Warner Brothers, a major film studio].

At that moment, when I was racking my brains over problems outside of the work…

From the first day of filming, actress Han Sena made that worry disappear.

Han Sena is now leading this filming twice, no, several times more proactively than I expected when I cast her.

I could feel Aiden and Chloe being completely led by Han Sena’s emotions and breathing.

I could hear the staff praising her from outside the monitoring room.

“We survived thanks to Sena! The equipment was really about to break because of the rain.”

“Your acting is really amazing, Sena. I’ve been to so many filming locations, but this is the first time I’ve seen an actress do this.”

“Wasn’t she a rookie actress? At this rate, we don’t have to be intimidated by Warners! We’re filming such a great work too.”

The sound of thunder echoed.

The staff didn’t seem to care, creating a friendly atmosphere.

Actress Han Sena was at the center of it.

Raymond smiled as he listened to their praise.

‘Yeah, that’s what I was trying to film. That’s all.’

It was the moment I realized that I didn’t need to be distracted by other problems.

“I really owe Sena a big debt.”