Magic Is Learned For Nothing [EN]: Chapter 47

You’re the Only One Who Doesn’t Know 2

“Stop it now. We’ll pay for the drinks you’ve had.”

Consomme spoke. As a middle-aged man, he was the village chief.

“Ah, these bastards, they still haven’t come to their senses. Why can’t people understand what I’m saying?”

Steel strode up to Consomme and kicked him in the stomach.

Consomme, struck in the abdomen, coughed violently and knelt down.

The men’s eyes darkened even further.

Consomme raised his hand to stop the men.

“Don’t interfere. You’ll die if you do.”

Consomme barely managed to get up and said,

“Everyone, step back. I’ll handle this.”

“But, still.”

“I said I’d take care of it.”

“Hey, it’s too late now.”

Steel stepped forward. His face was already full of annoyance.

“You should have left when I was being nice.”

Steel kicked Consomme hard in the stomach—

Consomme and the villagers squeezed their eyes shut.

However, Consomme didn’t feel any impact. When he cautiously opened his eyes, Steel was collapsed in shock.

“What are these guys?”

A familiar voice rang in the ears of Consomme and the villagers.

“Lord!”

* * *

Steel had a precious experience for the first time in his life. So, you can have such a humiliating experience.

*I* was the one who attacked, but *I’m* the one lying down.

I clearly kicked the old man, but that pig bastard blocked it. My foot landed right in his solar plexus [area in the abdomen where nerves converge].

But…….

He didn’t even flinch.

After a moment, the foot caught in his belly fat bounced back and hit my face. It hurt like hell. My foot hurts this much. Enraged, I threw a punch with all my might, but this time it was blocked by the pig’s shoulder. The blocked fist came right back to my face.

My face was a mess in an instant.

The villagers, who had been scared, covered their mouths and snickered as they looked at me.

I was so embarrassed.

“You son of a bitch!”

Steel lost his temper and lunged at the short pig.

The result is this.

Everything Steel had built up crumbled with one slap from that pig.

As Steel fell, he saw the broken door outside.

Buffalo was lying in an even more humiliating position. His face was buried in the ground, and his butt was pointing towards the sky. A wooden stick was stuck in his butt. Buffalo probably doesn’t even remember how he got hit.

He’s already unconscious.

When exactly did it happen? Could it be, that pig did it?

Steel was quite taken aback. He didn’t notice anything while Buffalo was being attacked. Me, who is said to be the most perceptive of the mercenaries…….

‘Damn it……. What the hell *is* that pig?’

Steel lost consciousness like that.

* * *

“Lord.”

Hita wiped the blood from his face, approached Legion, and knelt down.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

Legion waved his hand dismissively.

“Well, there’s no need to be so formal.”

“No, how can I stand with my gracious lord?”

“Oh, come on. Is there anyone here who doesn’t know it’s me? Just get up.”

At Legion’s words, Hita awkwardly straightened up and stood up. The face that had been hit by the large mercenary lying on the floor throbbed, but it wasn’t unbearable.

“I didn’t recognize you, Lord.”

“Huh? Why?”

Legion looked at Hita with an innocent expression as if he didn’t know anything.

“Well…….”

“Why? Speak.”

“You’ve gained…….”

“Gained what? Ah, do I look like I’ve gained some weight?”

Legion turned around in front of the villagers with a wobbly posture, spinning around.

*Why* is he doing that?

He’s a respected lord, but……. Can’t something be done about that appearance that kills the tension?

The villagers barely held back their laughter.

It’s a bit…… funny, but he’s still the lord, and he saved us from that situation a little while ago…… so let’s not laugh and get out of here as quickly as possible.

As they were uniting in that thought, Hita opened his mouth as if he had made a firm resolution.

“You seem to have gained quite a bit of weight.”

Hita said honestly.

A bit? A lot? Is it a bit or a lot? When Legion didn’t seem to understand, Hita nodded.

“You’ve gained a lot.”

“That…… much?”

Hita couldn’t bring himself to say, ‘You’re really fat.’

At Hita’s words, Legion grabbed his belly fat. He didn’t look that fat in the mirror. *That’s* strange.

-One of the effects of the ‘Dieting is Bad for Your Health’ passive skill.

What effect?

Legion tilted his head at Mark’s words. What is this guy going to say again?

-An effect that makes you satisfied with your appearance when you look in the mirror.

What?

Legion was dumbfounded. What the hell is this? So, even if people look at me and call me ‘pig-like,’ ‘disgusting,’ ‘extremely repulsive,’ I’m the only one who doesn’t know?

-That’s right. You think you look really handsome when you look in the mirror.

Wow!

I definitely looked handsome in the mirror this morning…… No, wasn’t that really the case? According to Mark, could it be…… that my vision has become strange?

-I don’t know. Um……. Do you see that woman?

Mark pointed to Rose, the tavern’s daughter. A slender waist and voluptuous figure, combined with a cute face. She is by far the most popular woman among the village’s young men.

But…….

“Ew! Why is she so ugly? Is it even possible for a person to be so withered?”

Legion shook his head. Did I see it wrong?

No way! She’s ugly even when I look again. Has Rose always looked so hideous? He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

It’s the same no matter how many times I look.

She smiled brightly at Legion.

Legion almost punched her in the face without realizing it.

-Wow! Your taste has become unique.

Legion ruffled his hair wildly.

This is a big problem. This isn’t just about my appearance, but also about my perception of other people. If this goes on…… if I fall in love with a female ogre, will I become enemies with Sepia?

No way-!

But I have a feeling that might happen. Aren’t reason and emotion completely different feelings? It’s a big problem if my heart starts pounding even if I know it in my head.

“What’s wrong?”

Hita looked at Legion, who was tearing at his hair, with a worried expression.

“Huh? It’s nothing. But what are those guys?”

Legion pointed to Steel and Buffalo, who were lying on the ground. I’m sure I’ve seen them somewhere, but I can’t quite remember.

“They seem to be mercenaries.”

“Mercenaries? We had mercenaries in our village?”

“I’m not sure either, but…… I think they might be the mercenaries that Julian the Vice Lord brought in.”

“My little uncle?”

“Yes, if not Julian the Vice Lord, then it would be Paring.”

“I see.”

Legion nodded. He stroked his thick five-layered chin with his fingers.

Given his little uncle’s personality, I don’t think he would have borrowed someone else’s hand to deal with me. So far, Paring has been behind all the shady plans. Didn’t he set up the assassin assassination plan? There’s a possibility that he did it again this time.

Could it be…….

Is that bastard Paring trying to assassinate me again?

Legion looked at Steel and Buffalo, who were lying on the ground. I came here to lose weight, but now I’m getting pissed off.

“Hey, you son of a bitch. Get up.”

He crushed Steel’s stomach with his butt. Steel’s body folded in half, and he let out a bizarre scream of ‘Kueeeek.’

Steel, who suddenly woke up, looked at Legion.

The pig was sitting on his stomach, and he couldn’t move at all. It was unbelievable that there was such a heavy human being. It felt like a giant rock was crushing and bursting his insides.

Fear arose in Steel’s eyes.

* * *

Paring, Haimo, Hailer, and Mizsett frowned as they saw Legion suddenly visit the mansion. Steel and Buffalo, who were tightly bound, were sprawled out on the floor.

Their arms and legs were tightly bound, and their mouths were gagged.

“What is it this time?”

Paring asked in a cold tone.

“Oh? You’re quite something. I was going to cut off your head if you spoke informally again today. More importantly, do you know these guys?”

Legion kicked Steel and Buffalo, who were lying on the floor, alternately. Steel and Buffalo groaned in pain as they were kicked in the stomach. They looked at their leader, Haimo, with pleading eyes.

‘That pig is the lord. He’s unbelievably strong. The information about him is wrong. We need to correct the information,’ they said with their eyes, but Haimo didn’t understand.

“…….”

Paring didn’t answer Legion’s question.

“What are you thinking so hard about? Aren’t these the guys you called?”

“Ah…….”

As Paring was about to shake his head, Legion spoke first.

“Then it’s okay to just kill them, right? These bastards tried to assassinate me.”

Paring frantically racked his brain about how to answer.

That pig lord is cunning and petty, unlike his appearance. If I say I don’t know them, they might both die. But if I say I know them, it will look like I ordered the assassination.

“Why? Is your head not working well?”

Legion chuckled.

He carefully examined the mercenaries.

Mercenary leader Haimo, I’m not interested in bald heads. Archer Hailer is a dark elf. The dark elf, who is famous for being beautiful…… was she always this ugly?

Magician Mizsett.

A female magician who boasts overwhelming decadent beauty.

She’s also disgustingly ugly. I have an urge to punch her in the face without realizing it.

Legion kept forgetting about the strange skill he had.

Well, it just makes my head hurt if I keep thinking about it. I’m already annoyed because my intelligence is low, so I need to reduce the amount of things I have to think about.

Besides, what do I care about women with such ugly faces?

Crackle, crackle.

Legion shook his head from side to side.

I was annoyed because I gained weight. I ruined my eyes by looking at ugly things. I’m already in a bad mood.

Yeah, let’s end this today, Paring.

“If you don’t answer in 3 seconds, I’ll just take these guys. They’ll spill the beans when they’re tortured. See you later.”

Legion stared at Paring silently.

“So, you don’t know these guys? One…… two…….”

“Wait, Lord.”

Paring spoke first before he could count to three.

“Speak.”

“But it seems you came alone today.”

“So?”

“This is…….”

As Paring flicked his fingers, Hailer moved slightly.

“Aren’t you being too arrogant?”

“Arrogant?”

“Like last time, and the time before that…….”

Paring gestured with his chin.

Hailer, who had already gone behind him, locked the door with a click.

Legion didn’t bother to look back.

“If you knew, you should have been careful, right? This is practically begging to be killed.”

“Oh, this bastard is finally talking. Hey, did you all hear that? This bastard is admitting that he tried to kill me.”

People laughed.

Yeah, you’re dead, today. That was the look on everyone’s faces.

“Hey, baldy! Did you hear me, or not?”

Legion called Haimo. Haimo’s expression twisted.

“Me?”

Haimo pointed at himself with his finger. No one who had ever called him baldy had ever survived.

“Yeah, you! Baldy, you.”

Legion said again definitively.

“This crazy bastard.”

Haimo walked menacingly towards Legion—

Splat—

He was slapped hard and fell down. Haimo flew 10 meters and crashed into the wall of the mansion.

“Let’s see who’s arrogant, you bastard!”