Not All Heroes From Earth Are Bad [EN]: Chapter 34

Doras, the battalion commander!

He was a relatively new battalion commander, having held the position for less than three years.

“Peaceful. It’s so peaceful.”

Doras was lucky.

He was assigned to the 3rd Corps headquarters as soon as he became a battalion commander.

This Black Fortress was one of the safest places within the Demon King’s army.

The corps commander resided here, and over ten thousand soldiers were stationed here.

Humans didn’t dare to think of coming here, and even if they did invade, the corps commander would take care of it in an instant.

So, there was no threat of war.

Since becoming a battalion commander, Doras’s days had been very peaceful.

Thanks to that, he had gained a lot of weight, but Doras liked that too.

This thick layer of fat was proof of peace.

“Peace, peace~”

A man who loved peace, despite being part of the Demon King’s army!

Doras was eating an unknown fruit and smiling peacefully.

Knock knock!

Someone knocked urgently on the door.

Doras frowned at the shattering of his peace.

“Battalion Commander Doras! It’s a disaster!”

The soldier who burst through the door was a familiar one.

He was the soldier who handled various chores for him.

“What’s the big deal?”

Doras said with an uncomfortable expression.

Daring to disturb his leisurely peace.

If it was something trivial, he was planning to kill him and replace the soldier.

“A large number of battalion members have deserted!”

“What!?”

Doras jumped up.

“Are you saying they deserted!?”

There was no other reason for a large number of soldiers to leave other than desertion.

‘Why!? Why!?’

He didn’t think he had treated the soldiers that badly.

He just occasionally gathered them to toss him in the air.

Or made a huge palanquin and enjoyed walks while lying on it.

He had ordered them to do other small things, but he hadn’t made any particularly unreasonable demands.

But desertion!

His position could be in danger.

However, the soldier’s next words were completely unexpected.

“It’s not desertion!”

“Huh? Not desertion?”

If it wasn’t desertion, what reason would there be for a large number of soldiers to leave?

“They said they were selected as cooks.”
“Ah, is that what it was?”

Doras breathed a sigh of relief. He slumped back into his chair.

“Such a fuss over such a trivial matter.”

Cook selection was a common occurrence.

It was usually done with the permission of the battalion commander.

“I heard a human is in charge of the kitchen this time?”

The head cook this time was a human.

“Well, a stupid human might not know the procedure and do things without permission. I, in my generosity, will let it slide. Tell them to be careful next time.”

The corps commander was watching the human with great interest.

There was no reason to provoke him and disrupt the peace.

“That’s not it! Battalion Commander!”

“What is it now?”

“Half of the battalion members have already been selected as cooks!”

“Huh?”

Half of the battalion members.

How could they be taking so many cooks so recklessly?

“Half of the battalion members!? How many did they take!?”
“Over two hundred have already been identified!”
“Have I ever seen such a crazy human…!”

Doras’s peace was being shattered.

***

At the same time, Choi Hyun-seok was still recruiting cooks.

“I, I’ll be a cook!”

One of the Demon King’s soldiers, who resembled a hedgehog, said with tears in his eyes.

“You. Then go and bring a friend.”

“F-Friend…?”

“Yeah. Anyone you eat, sleep, and ‘poop’ [defecate] with. If you bring just one, I’ll make them a cook too.”

“I understand!”

The soldier moved diligently, even though he was limping.

‘I can’t be the only one suffering…!’

Joy shared is doubled, and sorrow shared is halved.

The soldier forgot his pain and ran, thinking of giving a good opportunity to a colleague he didn’t particularly like.

“Good, good. It’s going very smoothly.”

After 영업 [a Korean slang term for aggressively pursuing or soliciting something, often in sales or recruitment] for over two hours like this, a considerable number of soldiers had gathered.

“Hero! You have a lot of subordinates now!”

Rachel said, very excited.

“Wow, how many are there!? Look here! It’s like an animal kingdom!”

Dogs, pigs, cows, horses, lions, and so on!

Soldiers with various faces were limping behind Choi Hyun-seok.

“Isn’t this all possible because of my excellent character?”

“Hmm…”

Rachel thought for a moment.

The soldiers were following him not because of his excellent character, but because of his excellent low kick.

But who cares.

As long as the result was good.

Things were going well for the first time in a long time, so she didn’t want to ruin it.

“That’s right! Hero, you’re the best!”

“Kuhahaha!”

“Kyahahaha!”

Rachel and Choi Hyun-seok laughed heartily.

The soldiers following behind glared at them with resentment.

“Demonic bastards…”

“That’s a human…”

Their insides were boiling, but all they could do was grumble quietly.

The law was far away, and the low kick was near.

“By the way, Hero. How many are you going to gather? It looks like there are already over two hundred?”
“Well. I think it would be good to pick about three hundred?”

“That many?”

“They’re going to die in droves every time we go hunting anyway, so I’m trying to pick a lot in advance. It’s annoying to go around often.”

“I see.”

Hemis didn’t say how many soldiers to pick.

So, he was planning to pick as many as possible while he could.

“By the way, why isn’t that guy coming?”

The last hedgehog he sent hadn’t returned.

“Don’t tell me he ran away?”
“How dare he…! If he ran away, I’ll catch him and pull out all his needles!”
“That’s a good idea!”

The hero and the exclusive fairy were perfectly in sync when it came to doing bad things.

“Ah! There he comes.”

Speak of the devil.

The hedgehog who had left a little while ago was seen returning.

Choi Hyun-seok narrowed his eyes.

The soldier coming with the hedgehog was somehow strange.

“What? I told him to bring a colleague, but why is he dragging a pig?”

Behind the hedgehog, a pig with thick layers of fat was waddling along.

“Are there guys like that in the Demon King’s army?”

It was a rare physique among the soldiers here, who were naturally endowed with huge muscles.

Rachel made a sullen face.

“Hero. Isn’t that pig a little strange…?”
“Of course, he’s strange. How is a guy like that even in the Demon King’s army?”
“Not that, the magic power is a bit…”

Rachel shared magic power with Choi Hyun-seok.

Therefore, she also grew naturally as much as Choi Hyun-seok grew.

Rachel felt an unusual energy from the pig walking towards them.

“Use the combat power measuring device once.”

“Okay.”

Choi Hyun-seok used the measuring device without complaint.

He frowned when he saw the letters on the lens.

“Huh, what’s wrong with this? Is it broken?”

He took off the measuring device, hit it a few times, and put it back on.

But Choi Hyun-seok’s crumpled expression didn’t improve.

“Hmm… that’s strange.”

“Why? What does it say?”
“That pig. It says its combat power is unmeasurable.”

“…”

Choi Hyun-seok and Rachel looked at each other silently.

Both instinctively felt that something was wrong.

“Should we run…?”

“Should we?”

The words to run away came out of their mouths simultaneously, as if they had rehearsed it.

Choi Hyun-seok and Rachel nodded at each other, then turned around.

“Naturally…”

“Let’s go back as if nothing happened.”

They tried to slip away quietly, but it was already too late.

“Hey! You there!”

Choi Hyun-seok ignored him and kept walking.

“Don’t ignore me! Human with Bobo! Choi Hyun-seok!”

The pig pointed at Choi Hyun-seok and shouted.

“Ah… Bobo was with me.”

“Heh, heh!”

Bobo smiled and looked back when his name was called.

“I have no choice…”

With such a large figure with them, it’s impossible to escape unnoticed.

Choi Hyun-seok had no choice but to turn around.

He put on the brightest smile he could muster to show that he knew nothing.

“Yes! Are you talking to me?”

“Yes. I am Doras, the commander of the 3rd Direct Corps.”
“Ah! You’re the battalion commander! I’m Choi Hyun-seok, the newly appointed head chef.”

Cold sweat ran down Choi Hyun-seok’s back.

“I already know that you are Choi Hyun-seok, the head chef.”
“Ah, it’s an honor. But why would such a high-ranking officer want to see me…?”
“Don’t play dumb. I know everything.”

“Yes?”

“What are you thinking, taking all of our battalion members!?”

“Yes!?”

Taking all the battalion members.

It was the first time he had heard of it.

In an instant, something flashed through Choi Hyun-seok’s mind.

‘These guys were all in the same unit!’

Because he was doing business in a multi-level marketing style, he unintentionally ended up taking all the soldiers from one battalion.

“Ah, I’m sorry…”

“Enough with the excuses!”

Choi Hyun-seok shut his mouth.

Pig Battalion Commander Doras narrowed his eyes, which were buried in his fat.

“Follow me. We’ll have to talk in my office.”

“Yes…”

Choi Hyun-seok sighed inwardly.

‘I knew things were going too well.’

***

As soon as he entered Doras’s office, a fragrant smell wafted over.

‘Looks delicious…’

On Doras’s desk were piles of luscious fruits and juicy meat.

“What on earth are you thinking?”

Doras, sitting in his chair, said while eating fruit.

Only then did Choi Hyun-seok come to his senses and open his mouth.

“Ah, I’m sorry. I absolutely didn’t intend to.”
“You didn’t intend to?”
“Yes! The legion commander told me that I could pick the cooks as I pleased. So I brought the most valiant-looking soldiers, but they happened to be subordinates of your excellent battalion commander.”

Choi Hyun-seok’s tongue danced eloquently.

He subtly mentioned that he had the legion commander as his backer, and at the same time, he praised Battalion Commander Doras.

“Hmm… is that so.”

The flattery was successful.

Doras’s expression softened a little.

In fact, all the high-ranking commanders of the legion knew Choi Hyun-seok.

Hemis had directly instructed them not to mess with him.

Doras didn’t want to cause problems with Choi Hyun-seok either.

All he wanted was peace.

“It’s all because of my ignorance! I’m sorry. I’ll return the conscripted soldiers to their unit.”

And Choi Hyun-seok also didn’t want to cause problems.

‘I can just pick soldiers from somewhere else.’

He was going to send back all the soldiers he had picked here and conscript new ones.

It was a bit of a hassle, but it was the cleanest and quietest way to handle things.

However, what came out of Doras’s mouth was an unexpected remark.

“That won’t do.”

“Yes?”

“Sending back soldiers who have already been conscripted? Doesn’t that look strange?”
“No! It happened because of my mistake…”
“No, no. I wouldn’t dare take back the soldiers that the legion commander gave you the authority to conscript.”

Doras bit into a chunk of meat.

“Munch! Munch!”

He chewed the meat greedily and looked at Choi Hyun-seok with sinister eyes.

‘Something’s wrong…’

Choi Hyun-seok, who was quick to notice things like this, instinctively realized it.

‘This wicked pig is plotting something.’

“Keep the soldiers and use them.”
“Is it really okay to do that?”
“Well, I can always get more soldiers. But there’s a condition.”

“A condition…?”

‘Finally, it’s here,’ he thought.

“It’s nothing much. I was hoping you could take one more soldier from our battalion as a cook. Would that be okay?”

Fortunately, Doras’s request was simple.

‘Just taking one more soldier is nothing.’

Choi Hyun-seok nodded.

“Yes. Just leave it to me!”

After all, Doras’s thoughts were obvious.

‘He’s just passing on a troublemaker.’

There was definitely a problem child who was difficult to deal with.

‘It’s probably not a physical problem… it’s obviously a political one.’

As a result of living in the Demon King’s army, Choi Hyun-seok learned one thing.

Even among demons, there is a social life of sorts.

In some ways, this was similar to human aristocratic society.

Demons valued family and lineage very highly.

Generally, abilities and growth limits varied depending on bloodline, so it was unavoidable.

‘I bet it’s a cliché where it’s some young master from a prestigious family.’

Choi Hyun-seok imagined various scenarios.

‘Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter.’

To begin with, Choi Hyun-seok was relatively free from these political issues.

‘My backer is the legion commander, you know.’

Behind Choi Hyun-seok was one of only five legion commanders in the entire Demon King’s army.

Unless the other party was the son of a demon king, there was no reason to yield.

Thump…! Thump…!

It was then.

Noise was heard from afar, and the office began to shake.

“Oh, it looks like he’s arrived.”

Doras grinned.

Perhaps the soldier he mentioned had arrived.

‘Something’s wrong…’

Why?

Choi Hyun-seok instinctively felt that something was going wrong.

What was coming was not some young master from a prestigious family.

Soon, the door to the office opened.

“Let me introduce you. This is Usaru.”

Doras explained.

Choi Hyun-seok looked at the soldier who appeared with a bewildered expression.

‘What is this…?’

The soldier’s identity was a giant of enormous size.

“Usa~ru!”

A monster whose head alone was bigger than a hug was sticking its face into the office.

“Battalion Commander. This soldier is…?”
“Ah! I forgot to mention it. Usaru is a hybrid born between an ogre and an orc.”

Doras said nonchalantly.

‘You forgot to mention that!’

It was something that could never be forgotten.

“Please take good care of our Usaru!”

“Yes…”

“Usa~ru!”

He suddenly ended up taking on someone who was not ordinary.