Return Of The Mount Hua Sect [EN]: Chapter 1033

As Hyun Jong approached, Chung Myung started to rise, but Hyun Jong gently waved him back down and sat heavily beside him.

Chung Myung stared. Hyun Jong chuckled softly.

“What? Is it too undignified for the Sect Leader of a great clan?”

“It’s not that, but…”

“I wasn’t born Sect Leader.”

Hyun Jong gazed at the river, a bitter smile on his lips.

“You know, when I first came to Mount Hua, I was freer then than I am now.”

Chung Myung frowned slightly. “Freer? Sect Leader, I don’t understand.”

Hyun Jong sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Maybe ‘free’ isn’t the right word. It’s more like… there was no system at all back then. Chaos, really.”

Chung Myung nodded slowly, considering this.

It made sense. People were constantly disappearing, and disciples left without warning. It would have been strange if there had been any order.

Hyun Jong, Hyun Sang, and Hyun Young were the only ones left of their generation to protect Mount Hua. So many others had left, leaving only these three.

“I never thought I would become Sect Leader. When I joined, my generation wasn’t high in the ranks. There were many senior disciples.”

“…”

“I always thought the Grand Senior Brother would become Sect Leader.”

“That rascal from back then?” Chung Myung asked bluntly. Hyun Jong chuckled.

“Yes. I thought that rascal would become Sect Leader.”

Hyun Jong glanced at Chung Myung and shook his head.

“There’s something you should know.”

“…”

“The rascal you saw back then must have been quite pathetic.”

“I won’t deny it.”

If Chung Myung had seen someone like that become Sect Leader, he might have given up on Mount Hua completely. It was fortunate that someone trustworthy held the position.

“But Chung Myung, Senior Brother wasn’t always like that.”

“…”

“The Senior Brother I knew when I was young was remarkable. I thought he could take charge of Mount Hua and raise it up.”

Hyun Jong shook his head.

“But time changes people. It can turn young men with dreams of glory into greedy old men. And shy young people can become leaders responsible for a whole clan.”

Hyun Jong paused. “I have always been grateful to you.”

Chung Myung started to speak, but Hyun Jong continued, needing to finish.

“It’s not because you lead Mount Hua, or because you did the things I should have done. I’m grateful simply because you trusted me completely.”

“…Everyone in Mount Hua trusts the Sect Leader.”

“Yes, perhaps. But it’s a little different, isn’t it?”

Chung Myung couldn’t answer. Everyone in Mount Hua trusted Hyun Jong, but not always completely. Even the elders probably didn’t believe he could revive Mount Hua. They followed him because he was their Senior Brother.

Chung Myung was the only one who utterly trusted him.

Hyun Jong’s authority came from this. Chung Myung, who would bite anyone else, never disobeyed him, so others respected and trusted Hyun Jong as well.

Hyun Jong knew this.

“Because I was so grateful, I’ve worked hard to be worthy of being Sect Leader. But it’s still not easy.”

“…Sect Leader.”

“You always said the Sect Leader deserves the position. But I still don’t know if I do.”

Hyun Jong smiled faintly. “I suppose one can’t escape their nature.”

The sky darkened, stars filling it. Hyun Jong stared at them. “Shaolin has no intention of going to Jiangnan.”

“…”

“You knew, didn’t you?”

Chung Myung nodded. “The Sect Leader suspected it too, didn’t he?”

“Yes. I suspected it. But I didn’t want to abandon even a sliver of hope. Or maybe I just wanted to buy time. While hearing the obvious answer, I could tell myself I wasn’t ignoring what was happening and was doing something.”

Hyun Jong laughed hollowly. “Was it the price for doing nothing?”

“…”

“Yes. I understood. But Chung Myung…” There was bitterness in his voice. “Even if I know the cost, even if I see it clearly, I’m still too cowardly to face it directly.”

“Sect Leader…”

Hyun Jong looked into the distance, his gaze desolate.

“You said…”

“…”

“That not many things can be divided into right and wrong. That whatever one chooses is simply different, not wrong.”

Chung Myung nodded. He had said that.

“But Chung Myung…” Hyun Jong sighed deeply. “Just because something isn’t wrong, it doesn’t make it right.”

“…”

“To me, that sounds like there is no right answer. I have to choose something I cannot choose, but if there is no right answer, which way should I choose?”

Chung Myung saw Hyun Jong’s fingers trembling.

“…I don’t have the courage to ignore those who are dying across the river.”

“…”

“But I also don’t have the courage to go across that river. Even though I’ve told you to sacrifice your lives for the agreement, I don’t have the confidence to watch you lose your lives over there.”

Hyun Jong ran a hand over his face, utterly exhausted.

“It’s not a problem I can choose. I am too small to bear that choice.”

He admitted he was inadequate. Chung Myung could guess at the torment Hyun Jong had endured.

Still gazing at the sky, Hyun Jong said, “I was furious when I heard the Abbot’s words.”

“…”

“It was so cowardly, so treacherous. He was only pursuing his own interests. It was ugly.”

Hyun Jong’s voice grew heavier. “But on the way back, I had a thought.”

Hyun Jong closed his eyes. “Perhaps I… don’t even have the courage to be a coward?”

“…”

“The Abbot’s choice may be cowardly, but it has a reason. He doesn’t want to see his disciples die. Even if criticized, he is protecting them.”

“Sect Leader…”

“You said that’s not wrong either, right? But is it truly right?”

“…”

“Perhaps that is another form of courage. Just as Heo Do-jin chose, Beop Jeong may know what he must do. The one who doesn’t know is… me.”

Chung Myung looked at Hyun Jong’s face, seeing his red-rimmed eyes. He couldn’t suppress a sigh.

“I don’t know. What is the difference between them and me? Is it because I didn’t have a virtuous predecessor?”

“That’s not it,” Chung Myung said firmly.

“What Mount Hua must pass on has been passed on. If we only follow our predecessors, there’s no reason for future generations to exist.”

“…”

“People who don’t think for themselves are not truly alive, even if they are breathing.”

“Yes. That’s probably right…” Hyun Jong nodded, his reddened eyes staring at Chung Myung.

“So, Chung Myung…”

“Yes, Sect Leader.”

“Just a little…” Hyun Jong paused, struggling to speak. “…Would it be so bad to be a little cowardly?”

“…”

His voice trembled. It seemed painful to say such things. The Five Swords, listening, lowered their heads, unable to look at Hyun Jong.

“I know this is shameless, as ugly as Shaolin… But I don’t know. Why can’t we do that?”

“…”

“Shaolin and Wudang are closing their eyes to their cowardice, so why must Mount Hua face it head-on? Why… for what, exactly?”

Chung Myung squeezed his eyes shut.

This was the question he had once asked Chung Mun. Why must it be Mount Hua? Why must only Mount Hua be like this?

He had shouted, filled with anger. Now, Hyun Jong was asking the same question.

Hyun Jong continued, sighing. “There will be things to gain by not avoiding it. Yes, there certainly will be.”

“…”

“But are the things we gain… greater than what we have to lose?”

Hyun Jong shook his head. “I can’t do it. I don’t have the confidence…”

“…Sect Leader.”

“I… I don’t have the confidence to tell Baek Cheon, who died for the agreement, that he was admirable. I don’t have the courage to smile at Yoon Jong’s grave, or to honor Jo Gul’s will in front of his coffin! I don’t even have the courage to weep while holding Lee Seol’s corpse.”

“…”

“You want me to…” Hyun Jong’s chin trembled.

“You want me to stand over your dead body and tell the others to follow this agreement? Me? Do you really expect that of me?”

Hyun Jong’s voice filled with emotion.

“Is the pride in the agreement more important than the lives of those children? Must they give up everything for that value? For what, exactly!”

“…”

“In this case…” Hyun Jong laughed as if everything was futile.

“Maybe it would have been better if we had stayed a small, unimportant clan in Shaanxi…”

Unable to watch, Chung Myung closed his eyes.

“If I had known regaining Mount Hua would require such a cruel price… I would never have made that choice.”

“…”

“I would never…” Hyun Jong’s head drooped.