Sincerely, Vanessa [EN]: Chapter 81

Having realized the extremely strange situation, Vanessa stopped chasing after Retima Quina from that day on. She devoted all her energy to practicing magic.

Mostly, she practiced either inside her own home or at Jonah Hill’s bookstore. Jonah Hill grumbled occasionally but seemed very interested in Vanessa’s progress, helping her with various things.

The more time she invested, the more specific the conditions for realizing magic became.

Vanessa discovered that besides simply ‘believing she could do it,’ she also needed ‘specific imagination.’

In vague imaginations, as if veiled in darkness, strange things would happen against Vanessa’s will. When she tried to conjure books, the window would break.

Of course, after that, Jonah Hill’s screams would violently pound her eardrums. Vanessa would shed tears as the cost of the window was deducted from her salary.

The formulas essential for estimating the scope were another source of pain.

For the first time in a long while, Vanessa stained her fingertips with ink, groaning at her desk. Anticipating and calculating helped, so she had to make time to study.

Vanessa tried not to be impatient.

In fact, there was no need to be. The efforts she had built up until now shone the moment she learned the conditions.

In just a few weeks, ‘magic that Vanessa thought was easy and simple’ had realization speeds that made the concept meaningless. They were achieved instantly as desired, eliciting admiration.

However, there were also sluggish parts. Even if the scale of the magic increased only slightly, the realization probability would plummet, often resulting in failure.

It was because doubt had crept into the ‘mind that she could do it.’ Just like now.

The magic power scattered, and the light that was about to bloom faded.

“Ah….”

Feeling tired, Vanessa fell backward.

In the narrow room, no matter which way she fell, it was onto the bed. The cheaply bought bed lacked cushioning and hurt a little, but if she wrapped herself in the blanket, well, it was somewhat satisfactory.

Vanessa wrapped herself tightly in the thick plaid blanket and grumbled inwardly.

How on earth do you believe in yourself? I can’t control it as I please.

It’s not my fault that I keep thinking, what if it doesn’t work out!

‘The power of magic is truly mischievous. It makes the clumsy dance and the tone-deaf sing.’

Suddenly, Professor Aper’s words came to mind. It seemed like something she had heard in her first semester at the academy, in the second semester of her third year.

Are you doing this because you know I lack confidence? That’s mean, that’s mean.

But who should I curse at? The sky? Or God? What was the name of the old god? Was it Ramaira?

Vanessa stared at the slightly torn gap in the wallpaper.

Thud.

At that moment, the sound of a letter falling through the Hornir entrance [a magical mailbox] was heard.

Vanessa didn’t want to leave the warm blanket, so she pretended not to hear and lay still. In the cold weather and with her tired body, there was no greater temptation than the thick blanket.

I’m too tired to get up. But who is the letter from?

In the end, unable to overcome her curiosity, Vanessa summoned light. A cluster of lights floated around, illuminating the darkening room.

Then, she faintly saw the black letters on the envelope.

Ah, that handwriting.

With wide eyes, Vanessa shook off the blanket as if kicking it away. Ignoring how she almost tripped over her tangled legs, she headed to the desk.

The letter was from Gideon. Unlike usual, the letter was not sealed with wax but seemed to be glued together. It was only natural since he had been dispatched for special forces duty.

Vanessa carefully opened the envelope, wary of tearing it.

⚜ ⚜ ⚜

To Vanessa.

I’m sorry for the infrequent contact.

This pen’s nib is broken, so it doesn’t write well. Can you believe that none of the special forces members carry a decent pen?

I’ll keep my numerous worries about you to myself for now. I don’t think I’ll be able to finish this letter in time.

According to the Minister of Finance, the Ministry of Finance’s Retima Quina has been missing since ‘that day.’

To be precise, she isn’t even Retima Quina.

The real Retima Quina was found dead several years ago, but her family had not yet reported her death, so the name remained in the area. It is presumed that someone took the name.

Thanks to this, a major personnel investigation is underway for the cabinet members.

The Crime Bureau under the Ministry of Justice is directly searching for Retima Quina, but since she was a fictitious person from the start, progress is slow.

I have confirmed that this information can be shared without issue.

However, in asking the Minister of Finance to investigate Retima Quina, your story came up a little, but I only said that we were acquaintances, so you don’t have to worry.

I am worried about your safety. Don’t dismiss it as unnecessary worry. Why are so many people approaching you?

Personally, I recommend coming to Valder Castle, but I know you would be uncomfortable.

I am not in Phydom right now, so I am sending this by letter instead of visiting.

Take care not to catch a cold in the cold weather. I long for the drawing room we were in together.

Missing you very much,

From Gideon.

⚜ ⚜ ⚜

The letter, which had no date, had increasingly messy handwriting towards the end, and it seemed like he had barely scribbled his name at the end.

Vanessa felt strangely uneasy looking at the letter, but she wondered if it was because it wasn’t the usual perfect handwriting without a single stray mark.

Just how busy is he?

The letter contained a lot of information. Vanessa frowned and sat on the chair, reading the letter several times as if to recall it.

It was a name she had temporarily pushed aside while focusing on magic. Retima Quina.

She had expected it when she saw her approaching so confidently, but to think it was really an alias. And even borrowing the name of a dead person….

Why on earth did she approach her? Did she need a young magician who didn’t know the ways of the world?

She was a newcomer who had just entered the cabinet, and she had no family to protect her, so she was probably a suitable person. She must have thought it would be very easy to lure her in by promising to tell her the conditions.

But what on earth would they use a magician for? Wouldn’t it be better to just hire a suitable magician with money? Did they want something more than just an employment relationship?

The speculation always stopped at this point.

Gideon seemed to know something, but seeing him so worried, she didn’t even want to ask.

Riddles are always like that. You think you can easily reach the answer by following the flow, but at some point, you get stuck and just grab your head.

The boy who appeared at the bookstore and provided clues about the conditions of magic, and Retima Quina, who tried to lure her in.

Vanessa banged her head on the desk. A sigh escaped her lips.

“Instead of just giving me riddles, someone please tell me the answer….”

The clusters of light she had summoned earlier circled around her as if to comfort her at her empty voice.

Vanessa took deep breaths and, encouraged by the warmth, raised her upper body again. Then, she took out her favorite pen and smooth paper.

Maybe he’ll see it if I send a reply right now. I hope I can ease his worries a little.

Without even taking the time to organize her thoughts, the pen began to fly across the paper.

⚜ ⚜ ⚜

To Gideon.

When did you even make the request to investigate Retima Quina?

It’s a good thing for everyone that you found illegality, but I feel a little heavy-hearted because it seems like I’ve added to your work.

My safety? The only dangerous thing in this narrow room is this: a thick blanket with cotton stuffed into every gap. Once you get in, you can’t get out.

This morning, I almost fell asleep again while pretending to be sick because I didn’t want to get up!

But I’m a magician, so I can somehow defeat a blanket.

Today, someone told me that the northern sea was frozen.

While everyone was saying they were curious about the sight, I thought of Gideon. I was worried that you might be cold while dispatched.

Of course, you have a very strong body, and the east is only slightly chilly, but I worry about Gideon as much as Gideon worries about me.

Does that make sense? So, you need to take care of your own body as much as you worry about me.

And the drawing room, what happened? We just talked, right? Right?

Um, now that I think about it, you seemed a little shy….

I’m saying this late, but it was quite nice to see.

As you said, I do long for the warmth of your hand. Hold your sword tightly instead of my hand. It might be a little cold, though.

Come back healthy.

From Vanessa, who is very worried.

⚜ ⚜ ⚜

Vanessa neatly folded the letter and tied it lightly with a thin string. The letter, placed in the pure white Hornir, disappeared as time passed.

Vanessa stared blankly at the Hornir for a moment before jumping up again.

I should practice magic a little more before going to bed.

Vanessa stretched her arms towards the ceiling. It was all because she had seen Gideon’s letter, but somehow her fatigue had disappeared.

Magic power flowed through her fingertips again.

After that, Vanessa spent magic power every single day without fail, until she was on the verge of collapsing, and fell asleep as if collapsing. If she managed to accomplish something somehow, it was much easier to realize from then on.

Of course, she was always exhausted in the morning, but she felt good. Just the fact that there was something left to improve made her feel energized.

And this was a secret hidden in her own heart, but the thought that she would have something to show Gideon when he returned made her even more motivated.

Gideon will be much less worried if he knows that I have realized the conditions.

When he returns to Phydom, I should immediately brag that I have figured out the conditions. When he asks how I figured it out, I should tease him by saying it’s a secret.

However, contrary to Vanessa’s expectations, Gideon was unable to return to Phydom for quite some time.