Княгиня Renia [a noble title, similar to a princess or duchess] felt restless all day.
It was because of the dream she had last night. She met Tan in her dream and had various conversations, but she couldn’t bring herself to ask about the ring.
The grandmother and grandfather she saw in her dream…
Among them, the grandfather gradually became younger and turned into Tan, and the ring was the same as the one Tan was wearing now.
Княгиня Renia was sure that the grandfather was Tan. It was just a hunch.
She couldn’t explain how he looked like that, but it seemed possible if it was him.
But she couldn’t bring herself to ask him if he was the one, or who the woman was.
The moment she heard the answer ‘yes’ from Tan’s mouth, she would never be able to hide her expression.
Even though it was in a dream, she could tell that the grandmother wearing the same ring next to him was a very precious person to him. Even in the dream, Tan’s eyes as he looked at her were filled with undisguised affection.
She couldn’t forget the careful look in his eyes, cherishing and treasuring her so much.
“Haa…”
After finishing dinner with her family, княгиня Renia, who had gone up to her hotel room first, sighed deeply.
She was supposed to meet Tan in the afternoon, and she was worried that this feeling would show. She didn’t want to show it, so she was trying to calm down.
Knock knock.
“Rea, are you inside?”
The one who knocked on the door was Enrique, the wife of her first older brother and the eldest daughter of the Marquis of Merem.
Enrique, who came with her on this family trip, was her older brother’s wife, but they had been friends of the same age since they were young, so they spoke comfortably when they were alone.
“Come in.”
As soon as permission was granted, the door opened and Enrique carefully stepped into the room.
“Enrique, what’s wrong?”
Княгиня Renia, who was sitting down, got up and asked in surprise.
She seemed fine even at dinner, but Enrique looked somehow anxious and full of worries.
“Actually, I’m worried…”
“Sit down first.”
She kindly offered the seat next to her.
Enrique, who was fidgeting with her hands gathered in front of her, hesitated and sat down on the chair.
“What’s wrong? What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“Rea… I…”
Enrique trailed off, looking down.
Could something have happened with her older brother?
Княгиня Renia unknowingly swallowed hard, thinking that it was not a trivial matter.
“I…”
“Yes. It’s okay, Enrique. Tell me.”
Княгиня Renia took Enrique’s hand. Enrique’s hand was cold, as if she was nervous.
Just as she was about to open her mouth again, worried…
“…I’m pregnant.”
“Yes, pregnant… Huh?”
Княгиня Renia blinked in surprise, agreeing.
“It’s been 5 weeks now.”
“Congratu…!”
Княгиня Renia couldn’t bring herself to say congratulations, which was welling up in her throat.
Because Enrique’s face, confessing that she was pregnant, didn’t look very good. Rather, she looked anxious and sad.
“What if he doesn’t like it very much?”
Enrique revealed the reason for her distress. Surprised, княгиня Renia got up from her seat and sat down in front of Enrique.
“Enrique, look at me. There’s no way that’s true. It’s your and your brother’s child. He’ll be happier than anyone in the world.”
Княгиня Renia held Enrique’s hand even tighter when she saw that Enrique’s eyes were red.
Even though she had never experienced it, she somehow felt very familiar with and understood Enrique’s current state of mind.
It is right to be blessed, but the fear that the person you love may not have the same mind and thoughts as you.
‘Young-ah [term of endearment]… I’m scared.’
Suddenly, княгиня Renia heard someone’s voice. A voice that was both missed and longed for.
‘I’m worried. In case you get hurt, in case that existence gnaws at you.’
What is this sound?
As if that person, who found out about her, the child in her womb, was saying…
“If he’s not as happy as I am…”
“What are you talking about?”
Confused, княгиня Renia came to her senses at Enrique’s voice.
“He can’t *not* be happy. But he might be worried. Pregnancy and childbirth are not easy things. It will be hard for you, and it can hurt you.”
Княгиня Renia stroked Enrique’s hand, which was trembling, and conveyed the feelings her older brother would feel.
Because she realized that when she thought of the voice she had just heard, she could be happy that the person she loved had her child, but at the same time, she could be in pain.
“Really…?”
“Of course. Don’t you know your brother? You know him better than anyone else.”
Княгиня Renia sincerely comforted and encouraged Enrique.
Enrique, who had calmed down, plucked up the courage and left the room to talk to her older brother.
“…Strange.”
After Enrique left, княгиня Renia, who was left alone in the room, muttered with a blank face.
Enrique’s situation was not unfamiliar.
She had a sense of déjà vu, as if she had once had this concern.
She stared blankly out the window.
The hill with the most famous park in the south was in sight.
Far away, she could see someone standing on a hill with a large tree planted on it.
It was too far away to see her eyes, nose, and mouth properly, but she was sure that the person was looking somewhere.
It was right here where she was standing.
And Tan was standing there.
As if he was always looking at this place, always looking at her.
* * *
Княгиня Renia left the hotel without delay and got into the carriage.
Because there was something to check.
As she left the hotel, she saw her older brother crying at the news of Enrique’s pregnancy, hugging her and rejoicing, and soon worrying.
As expected, her expectation that he would be worried at the same time as joyful was correct.
If you know that the person you love has a new life in her body, you will think like that.
Like anyone else.
“I can’t go up any further from here.”
“Yes. Thank you.”
Княгиня Renia got out of the carriage and looked up at the distant high hill.
There was no way for the carriage to go, so she had to go up herself, but it didn’t matter.
She had to meet him right now. There was something she wanted to ask him.
Why do I keep getting this sense of déjà vu? Did you know me before?
Maybe I’m in that dream…
“Oh? Sister!”
Suddenly, someone grabbed her sleeve.
“Are you here to see Uncle?”
It was Jenny.
Jenny was looking up at her with expectant eyes, shining her clear eyes.
“Yes. Is he up there?”
“Yes. Uncle likes high places.”
“…”
“So he’s always looking out the window from the highest room in our house.”
At those words, Renia’s gaze naturally turned towards the high hill. Her brown eyes, reflecting his figure as a mere dot, trembled slightly.
At the same time, her hands began to shake uncontrollably.
Her vision blurred with a surge of emotion.
“Eugene says it’s Uncle’s habit. A habit to keep the promises he made. Eugene is my nanny and used to serve Uncle.”
“Habit…….”
“Yes. She didn’t tell me what promise it was, so I don’t know either. But she said it was an important one.”
“…….”
In that moment, uncontrollable tears streamed down Renia’s face.
The memories that had been blurred like fog, the scattered fragments of recollections, instantly connected like a film, flashing before her eyes.
Ah, how could I forget?
Even until the moment I closed my eyes, even with my eyes closed, his voice whispering to me was so vivid.
Now that I realize it, it’s as clear as if it were yesterday.
“So, Eugene asked me to stay by Uncle’s side so he wouldn’t be lonely… Sister? Are you crying?”
Jenny, who had been chattering away, widened her eyes like a rabbit. Renia was shedding tears profusely.
“Because he said he would come out to meet me.”
“Yes? Meet you?”
“He said he would be the first to come out to meet me. The me who would come to find you.”
“What does that…….”
“Jenny.”
Only then did Renia look straight at Jenny’s face. A face that looked so much like her own.
“Thank you. For being by his side.”
Smiling at Jenny through her tears, she left those words behind and dashed towards the hill.
“Sister! Sister!”
“Don’t follow her.”
Surprised, Jenny tried to chase after her, but McRyan grabbed her hand, appearing as if from nowhere.
“But…….”
“She’s going to keep a long-awaited promise.”
McRyan silently watched her back as she finally headed towards him.
Renia ran up the hill, and up again.
Her breath caught in her throat, but she didn’t stop.
Tears flowed so profusely that she had to wipe them away with her arm several times as her vision blurred as if in a fog.
How could I forget?
I said I wouldn’t forget. I swore I would never forget.
I promised I would come soon, so he wouldn’t have to wait long.
Tears couldn’t help but flow with a mix of apology, gratitude, and guilt for not recognizing him.
Her heart ached at the thought of him remaining alone in that room, waiting only for her, while she, reborn, was loved by her new family.
Her throat tightened at the thought of him enduring and spending that cold and lonely time all alone, while she, unaware of it all, was just laughing, chatting, and living happily.
Not even knowing he was waiting like that…….
Not even knowing he had developed a habit without her knowing, foolishly…….
Renia understood.
Why Tan had developed the habit of looking down from the highest place.
‘I need to be able to meet you without us passing each other by…….’
‘Don’t worry. Just come find me. If you do, I’ll be the first to come out to meet you.’
Tan had whispered that promise as she closed her eyes.
The highest place.
To look down at a glance and meet the her who would return to him with her memories.
At the end of Renia’s gaze, who had climbed the hill without taking a single breath even as her breath reached her chin, Tan was visible.
He was still looking down with a quiet gaze.
Looking at his still broad back, she wiped the tears from her cheeks and walked towards him.
She had so much to say that she held back the tears that kept trying to flow and opened her trembling lips.
“Were you foolishly still doing that?”
“Renia?”
He couldn’t have missed the sound of footsteps, but he turned around with a slightly surprised expression, as if lost in thought.
Soon, his expression hardened as he quickly approached her. He had seen her red eyes, as if she had been crying her heart out.
“Why are you crying?”
Unlike his voice, which asked as if pressing for an answer, his large hands carefully and tenderly cupped her cheeks.
At that touch, thick tears streamed down her face, as if the dam had broken.
“You should have come to find me sooner. You should have appeared before my eyes. You should have told me everything.”
“…….”
“Hic…… I was too happy without knowing. I was living too well without knowing you were waiting…….”
“Eun-yeong.”
That name flowed out of his mouth involuntarily, which had been stiff as if struck by lightning at the sight of her crying.
“Sniff…… What am I going to do? I’m so sorry. I said I would come soon, that I would come to you quickly so you wouldn’t have to wait long, but what am I going to do for making you wait so long…….”
She couldn’t stop crying, feeling so happy that her unforgettable name had flowed from his lips again, yet so sorry at the same time.
I wanted to see you smiling…….
I wanted to meet you again with a brighter smile than ever when we met again.
When she closed her eyes by his side, ending her past life, she had hoped to meet him again by his side, smiling as she returned.
Foolishly forgetting the person she should never have forgotten until now.
“Eun-yeong.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…….”
She sobbed at his voice, which soothed and caressed her.
In the midst of it all, she cried even more at his actions of gently rubbing away her tears with his hands, worried that it might sting.
“It’s okay. Look at me. Huh?”
“…….”
“Look at me.”
At that voice, she, who had been sobbing with her shoulders shaking greatly, raised her eyes.
His trembling red pupils were moving back and forth as if trying to capture her in front of him.
Now she could see his face.
At the same time, she was able to face it.
The moment when the loneliness he had waited and waited for so long alone for this moment was instantly replaced with overwhelming emotion.
“It’s okay.”
He was looking at her with eyes that seemed to say that everything was really okay, that nothing else mattered.
“You finally came.”
His hand, which had been wiping away her tears with the back of his hand, slowly went up.
“So it’s okay.”
He stroked the face he had never forgotten for a single moment with his fingers.
The round forehead, the brow bone, the eyes that were swollen but still the same, the sharp and high nose, and the soft lips.
The touch felt in his hand was not an illusion.
She had really come to find him. Back to his side.
“Just hug me.”
“…….”
“That’s all I need.”
At those words, she reached out her hands without hesitation and hugged his waist.
Tan also hugged her small frame, which he had regained, tightly and bent down. His face touched her slender shoulder.
“I missed you.”
She said the words she had wanted to say in his arms.
The two were hugging each other tightly, as if they had become one.
Soon, her shoulder where his face was touching became wet.
It was his tears.
He, who had not cried even when she died, was crying.