There Is No Place For Fakes [EN]: Chapter 4

<4>

“……This is no time for this. I have to go to Father.”

Philomell wiped away her tears and hurried her steps. Eustis held her lifeline, not them.

‘So, I won’t get hurt.’

Philomell looked around and walked slowly. Being young, she hadn’t received a separate palace and resided within the Imperial Palace, which was fortunate in times like these.

Besides, for some reason, the number of people in the palace had been decreasing for some time.

Avoiding the few remaining palace staff, she arrived in front of the Emperor’s office.

Due to Eustis’s nature of not having separate guards within the palace, there was no one near the office.

Philomell carefully opened the door slightly.

“……Persistent, Polan.”

The scene inside the office came into view through the narrow doorway.

Despite the dazzling decorations, Duke Polan was with Eustis in the desolate-feeling room.

Duke Polan was giving a speech to the Emperor, who was sitting at his desk.

“But, Your Majesty. Since the Princess is ill, wouldn’t it be good to visit her?”

As it happened, their topic was Philomell.

That was good. She wouldn’t have to directly probe Eustis’s intentions to know what he thought of her.

Philomell quietly listened.

The Emperor frowned and said.

“Why are you so concerned about that thing? Does it evoke sympathy because it’s sick? It’s just feigning illness again anyway.”

“The court physician says it’s a really bad cold this time.”

“So?”

“If Your Majesty were to visit, it would be a great encouragement to the Princess…….”

“What’s so important about a cold?”

Duke Polan paused.

He had been a loyal subject to Eustis since he was just an Imperial Prince. So, he could ask personal questions relatively freely.

“Why are you so harsh on your daughter, Your Majesty? Isn’t she your only blood relative?”

Philomell’s chest tightened.

She had always wondered about that.

Why wouldn’t he give her affection?

And the Emperor’s answer was shocking.

“I have never felt that thing was my child.”

It felt like something had fallen on her head with a thud.

“Could it be that you think Princess is the reason why Isabella passed away? So…….”

“Shut up.”

“……I apologize.”

Polan immediately bowed his head at Eustis’s fierce demeanor. In front of him, the story of his dead wife was a kind of taboo.

The Emperor said grimly.

“There was a time when I thought so. I resented her very much. To the point where I wanted to take her life with my own hands.”

“…….”

“But that’s all in the past. I don’t feel anything now.”

“Why…….”

“Because I have no expectations. I didn’t even expect it to fill Isabella’s void. I would have been satisfied if it had only fulfilled the minimum role as a successor.”

Eustis, who was pressing his temples with a tired face, continued.

“But what is the result? Neglecting classes and only producing insignificant results. Yesterday, it even showed a disgraceful appearance in front of many people.”

“……Philomell is also trying. There may be times when she slips up.”

“If causing trouble is effort, then you are right.”

Eustis raised only one corner of his mouth and laughed in vain.

“You are too strict. The Princess is only nine years old. It’s natural to have immature aspects.”

“I was fighting against my blood-related brothers at that age.”

“That was because of the situation at the time, and Your Majesty was outstanding from a young age…….”

“That thing doesn’t resemble Isabella or me at all.”

“Even if she doesn’t resemble you, she is Your Majesty’s daughter.”

“That’s enough. Go now.”

He got up from his seat and approached the cabinet lined with liquor bottles on one side of the room. His back, pouring amber liquid into a glass, showed no intention of continuing the conversation.

It would only irritate the Emperor to say more than this. Eustis was slightly more lenient to Polan than others, but only slightly.

Duke Polan was about to step back when he turned back to the Emperor for the last time.

“……Do you really not feel any affection for the Princess?”

Before Duke Polan came out of the door, Philomell had to leave quickly.

But her feet wouldn’t move. She had to hear Eustis’s answer. Philomell’s fate depended on that answer.

Eustis slowly opened his mouth.

“Yes. Now, there’s only one thing I want from it.”

Philomell took a deep breath.

“To live like a dead mouse. So that I don’t have to pay attention to it, so that I don’t even know it’s there.”

It was such a cold and solid word. As if it would never change.

* * *

When she came to her senses, she was already back in her room.

Thanks to Duke Polan continuing to stay in the office to respond to what he said right after Eustis’s last words, Philomell was able to return without being noticed.

She collapsed onto the bed.

“What should I do now?”

Her father, no… the Emperor, didn’t regard her as a daughter at all, and didn’t have an ounce of affection for her.

If Ellensia appears in the future and it is revealed that Philomell is a fake, he will surely not forgive her.

What if she doesn’t act wickedly like ‘Philomell’ in the book and lives kindly?

‘Wouldn’t I at least save my life?’

It didn’t seem like an impossible story.

Even in the novel, she didn’t die immediately after it was revealed that she was a fake. It was thanks to Ellensia, who felt sorry for Philomell, begging Eustis to forgive her.

It is true that the ‘evil’ Philomell, jealous of Ellensia, repays her kindness with enmity and is eventually executed.

If she understands her place well and acts accordingly, she might be able to avoid death, unlike in the book…….

“But…….”

That alone is not enough.

She didn’t want to risk her life on such a slim hope.

It was a precarious life where she didn’t know when she would die if she annoyed the Emperor even a little.

The maids and guards she saw today came to mind on their own. They had clear hostility towards Philomell.

It’s just gossip now, but what if the fact that she’s not a princess is revealed?

“……They won’t leave me alone.”

What’s scary is that the group of people who hate her might not be the only ones.

What if they spread bad rumors or slander Philomell?

‘Can I guarantee my life then too?’

This is not it either. Philomell wanted a more certain chance of survival. She never wanted to die.

At that moment, a thought suddenly came to her mind.

Let’s run away. Even if it’s impossible right now, let’s leave this place before Ellensia appears.

It was the moment when the life plan of the young fake princess was decided.

* * *

After that, until just before going to bed, Philomell spent the whole day elaborating on the escape plan she had come up with during the day.

Even though she went to bed early, she didn’t fall asleep until late because of her complicated head.

So, she didn’t even notice someone entering the room late at night.

“Princess, Your Majesty…….”

Eustis gestured for the nanny, who was trying to wake the sleeping child, to leave.

‘What am I doing?’

The Emperor reproached himself as he looked down at Philomell’s white, round face.

Duke Polan didn’t easily back down and kept bringing up the topic of the princess, giving Eustis a look.

He could have just ignored it, but as Duke Polan kept mentioning it, he somehow felt like he should check on his daughter’s condition at least once.

Perhaps it was because her yellow eyes, which had faced him straight in the rain yesterday, seemed somehow determined and desperate.

Of course, it must be a misunderstanding. What desperation could there be for someone growing up spoiled as the Emperor’s only daughter.

But even with the naked eye, she looked emaciated, and Polan’s words that the child was quite sick seemed to be true.

“……ther.”

Suddenly, a small voice came from the young one’s mouth.

“……Father.”

He wondered if she had woken up, but Philomell was still tossing and turning with her eyes closed. It was just a simple sleep talk.

“I…… I’ll be a good kid…… So…… don’t…… kill…… me.”

A weak resonance as if it would go out if blown.

There were a few more words, but most of them were close to mumbling, so Eustis only understood that much.

Then, as if she was very sad, she started crying even while sleeping.

For some reason, Eustis couldn’t take his eyes off Philomell’s face.

There was a faint memory passing by. As Eustis pondered what it was, he soon recalled a memory from a distant time.

A young child trembling with fear of dying every night and barely falling asleep. It was himself in his childhood.

Surprisingly, it was similar to the current Philomell.

It was the moment when he felt for the first time in his life that his daughter and he had something in common.

He was so busy piling up blood and sin to survive and stand at the top that he had completely forgotten that there was such a time.

The Emperor impulsively reached out and wiped away the tears flowing down the child’s cheek. Very faintly, the emotions and desires of that time were revived.

At that time, he wanted someone to reach out to him like this.

Firmly.

“……”

A small, chubby hand grabbed the tip of Eustis’s hand. It was also an action the child took while intoxicated with sleep, but he was a little surprised.

The sensation of touching someone else’s skin other than his dead wife was very unfamiliar, but it was not unpleasant.

The child’s hand was much smaller and warmer than he thought. He felt the small warmth for a long time before returning.