Magic Is Learned For Nothing [EN]: Chapter 59

Magic is Learned in Vain – Episode 59 (59/502)

# 59

HOUSE OF HORRORS 2

It was the hour when everyone was asleep, but the knights and mercenaries couldn’t afford to rest.

Their bodies were burning.

They were running a high fever. Opening the window brought a rush of cold air from outside, but even the chilly breeze couldn’t quell their heat.

“Wow, this is driving me crazy. What’s going on?”

Cox fanned his face with his palm.

He had a feeling he knew the cause of this heat. They said it was a health-boosting food, and the heat was indeed intense. Fanning himself, Cox paused as he looked out the window.

Were those incredibly beautiful women performing a sword dance in the garden?

The sight, illuminated by the moonlight, was enchanting. He rubbed his eyes and looked again. It was indeed women. He felt like he was possessed by a ghost.

So, he woke Soul up, who was sleeping.

“Ugh, it’s so hot. Do something for me.”

Soul clung to Cox, tearing at his own top.

What the hell is this crazy bastard doing?

“This is no time for that. Look at that.”

Cox pointed out the window.

“Don’t know. Don’t know. Just cool me down.”

Soul was being completely unreasonable. This crazy bastard! He’s taking off his underwear too.

“Let go, I said let go. You pervert, are you trying to get lucky!”

Cox pushed Soul away mercilessly.

The back of Soul’s head hit the wall with a thud. This was something that would never happen normally. He would have grabbed a sword and threatened to kill him without a doubt.

But he didn’t seem to have any such thoughts.

“Ouch, that hurts.”

Seriously, did this guy have a taste for this kind of thing? That’s something he never knew. Damn it, this is no time for this.

“Look at that. Now.”

Cox dragged Soul over and made him look out the window.

“What, what is that? Who are those women?”

“Beautiful, aren’t they?”

“Very.”

Gulp.

He swallowed hard.

Spring was coming soon, but the weather was still quite chilly. It was natural for the temperature to drop below freezing at night. Women dressed so scantily, performing a sword dance in freezing weather.

“Are we possessed by a ghost or something?”

Soul said in a slightly excited voice.

“I don’t know.”

“Huh? Did those women see us?”

Soul’s eyes widened. Their eyes met.

The women didn’t seem embarrassed. They were very confident. They beckoned them with their beautiful fingers, as if enticing them.

Come to us. Let’s go together.

“Let’s go. I want to die in those women’s arms, even if it kills me.”

“No, it’s dangerous to act rashly.”

“Then you stay here. I’m going out.”

Soul didn’t even bother to dress properly and burst out the door.

Cox waited for a moment.

The sense of unease…… is no longer felt.

“Hey! Soul! Wait up!”

Since that bastard ran out first anyway, his responsibility would be minimal. What was important now was whether he could get a woman even prettier than that unlucky Soul.

So, he went down to the garden.

He thought it would be just Soul and him, but all the knights and mercenaries were rushing out into the garden like they were possessed.

Those beautiful women standing in front.

And a small pig blocking their way.

The pig said.

“Ahem, this area is off-limits.”

Soul looked like he was about to pop his eyeballs out and blow the little pig’s head off. Cox quickly stepped forward.

“Get out of the way if you don’t want to get hit, you little pig!”

Legion almost forgot his plan and punched Cox in the face.

* * *

Two hours earlier.

Legion saw Lich Mamon. This was really hopeless no matter how he looked at it. What to do.

“Are you satisfied?”

Legion asked.

“I didn’t have hair in my previous life. So…….”

Lich Mamon began to talk in detail about his past life. Ah, it was truly a behind-the-scenes story that you couldn’t listen to without tears.

He should have just not listened.

Lich Mamon was originally a white magician.

He said himself that he was a genius. It’s hard to believe this. Anyway, he seemed to have risen to a fairly high level in a short period of time.

But he couldn’t walk the flower path [a metaphor for a life of ease and success] forever.

Hair loss that started in his early 20s. It was a really unfortunate event. He hadn’t even had a proper romance yet! He couldn’t even get married! Even if he became an 8-circle archmage, his hair wouldn’t grow!

His dream was to be the youngest 7-circle magician.

If he could do that, any kingdom would bring bundles of money to take him away.

The future was smooth sailing.

Just one worry…… baldness.

There was no answer if he became bald at such a young age. That was Mamon’s only concern.

Seeing him like that, his friends said.

“It’s okay. Aren’t you a genius? Once you become a 7-circle magician, women will line up. You can pick and choose as much as you want.”

Mamon shook his head.

He didn’t need a woman who wanted that kind of money. What he wanted was true love. Pure love. Eternal love that would not change even in the face of the evil dragon’s envy and jealousy. Mamon sincerely wanted to be in love.

That’s right, he was a truly wonderful romantic.

But the hair that began to fall out grotesquely! He gradually lost confidence. He gradually distanced himself from women, and he treated all the women who looked at him as snobs who wanted money.

Mamon poured all his passion into research.

He found all kinds of drugs and tested them on his scalp.

Troll’s blood! Ogre’s tears! Dragon Heart! He spent all his fortune to get all of that and poured it on his head. But the hair that had fallen out once never came back.

Then he found this passage in an ancient book.

-Black magicians are not bald. They all have abundant hair.

Mamon succumbed to the devil’s whisper.

He made a contract with Bahamut among the demons and became a black magician. And then he found out, damn it…… none of the demon bastards had hair.

It was only after becoming a lich that his wish was fulfilled.

“Thanks to you, Master, my lifelong wish has been fulfilled. Thank you so much.”

Lich Mamon knelt on one knee.

“O-oh, is that so.”

Legion answered awkwardly.

To be honest, it’s more disgusting now.

The state of the skull with the hood on had an atmosphere that was difficult to approach. But now, because of the short hair, he looked like a stalker or serial rapist sticking to the wall and targeting the woman next door.

“Can’t you cut your hair neatly? It looks too long…… or, how about messing it up a bit like a man?”

“My lifelong wish has now been fulfilled. Can’t you let it grow a little more?”

Really…… he doesn’t even have a tongue, but he seems to be speaking very earnestly.

Ah, your heart is being conveyed to me very deeply.

“Well, if that’s how you feel, then do it. Keep growing it until you like it.”

“Thank you for your great generosity, Master. I hope that someday I can repay even 1/1,000 of your grace.”

Over the top. Over the top. I just wish you would cut your hair short. A skull with straight bobbed hair.

“Anyway…….”

Legion smiled bitterly and turned his head out the window.

Outside, thirty-five men were sticking their heads out the window.

“Isn’t this too much of a scam?”

“What do you mean?”

“Your charm magic and hydra meat.”

Lich Mamon was also looking at that side as if he was embarrassed. Well, it’s understandable that he doesn’t understand since he has no sexual desire. Of course, those orc women are attractive enough…….

-Nim! Please come to your senses!

“Anyway, shouldn’t we talk about the contract and plant the seeds of fate before we connect those guys’ love?”

Legion, who likes to be thorough, watched the knights running out and walked out into the garden.

As expected, the story about the contract proceeded smoothly.

* * *

A blank expression is made at times like this.

Soul and all the other men looked at the orc female warriors who were sticking right next to them. The faces of the orc female warriors, who were bigger than bison, were full of joy. They picked up food with forks and fed it to their partners.

Chew, chew.

The men didn’t even know what they were eating. They just ate it because it came into their mouths.

“Okay, knights, stamp your seals here…… That’s right! Now, a drop of blood here…… Yes! Good!”

The knights felt like they were dreaming.

What was in front of their eyes were clearly angels. Angels so beautiful that they couldn’t bear to look them in the eye.

They were afraid that she would leave like that.

So, the men grabbed her hands and poured out their hearts.

“Don’t go. Please stay with me forever.”

The angels shook their heads.

“They say human men are like ships, right? They make us women into ports. You will leave soon. We don’t want to wait for you forever.”

The men became anxious.

They couldn’t let the angels go like this.

“I swear. I will stay by your side forever. Look at this, my blood oath! I will swear to the Lord! I will bet my family’s honor and my own honor.”

“I can’t believe it. You already have a master you serve.”

“I don’t need anything. I’m only looking for love. You’re all I need. Only you!”

The men proposed to the angels, risking their lives.

“Okay, before that, you have to put your fingerprints here too.”

Of course, in the meantime, Legion quickly completed the soul contract. Only then did they agree.

A dreamlike time continued all night.

A dreamlike time that would be hard to experience again in a lifetime, a time that felt like eternity. And morning came.

He didn’t know that the morning sunlight was so dazzlingly beautiful.

They looked at the orc female warriors who were sleeping in their arms, snoring, snoring.

“Aaaaaaack!”

All the men screamed simultaneously.

The orc female warriors covered their chests with blankets and smiled shyly.

“Husband, are you awake?”

Husband…….

Husband…….

Husband…….

After that, they lost their minds.

Love vows, soul contracts, lifelong curses, oaths of language, and even blood oaths and oaths to the Lord were all made.

If they didn’t keep it, the curse would be too much for them to handle alone, and their entire family might be wiped out for generations. The curse would last forever as long as their blood flowed.

Hadn’t they sworn so themselves?

They couldn’t say a word until they left Legion’s territory.

They got into the carriage as if they had no souls.

The pupils of everyone’s eyes were empty.

“Nine husbands are on car number 1. Departure!”

“Car number 2 is also departing. My husband is on car number 2. Please drive carefully.”

“Car number 5 is also ready. If your husbands need to urinate on the way, please tell the coachman. Departure!”

Thus, five carriages left for the village of Amazon orc female warriors.

Jonas faced Legion with a slightly tired face.

“I came after receiving an urgent call…….”

“Do you like it?”

Legion asked.

“I like it, but…… it seems a little crazy. Aren’t they a little worse than the people you sent last time? Did you give them medicine?”

“What medicine? I fed them the hydra meat you guys like so much.”

“Huh, why are they like that when they ate hydra meat? Everyone is going crazy trying to eat even one more piece.”

“What do I know? I couldn’t sleep yesterday. This is embarrassing.”

Legion shook his head.

He hasn’t even held a woman’s hand properly yet. Of course, he hasn’t even kissed her.

He should have switched to auto mode and gone out for training instead. He just couldn’t sleep properly listening to the sounds of ‘eung eung eung’ [onomatopoeia for suggestive sounds]. Ah, I’m tired.

“Here, this.”

Jonas handed Legion a fairly large jewelry box.

“Didn’t you give me everything last time?”

Legion was slightly surprised because the amount was considerable.

“I can’t pass all the cards on this side yet. There’s still quite a bit left. You know there are still thirty-five people left, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I’ll give you this much more when you fill a hundred people.”

“I will work hard. Customer. And what about the exclusive rights?”

“Of course!”

“I will serve you with loyalty for the rest of my life, customer!”

Legion smiled brightly as he looked at Jonas. He hoped that there would be three red zircons in the jewelry box.