Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 226

I knew my popularity was decent; the Blossense Official Statistics Bureau had concluded as much.

“…It’s kind of amazing.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. My solo track got some spotlight too, but the speed at which the views are climbing is different.”

Oh, dear.

“…This isn’t good at all.”

The effort I put into the lyrics is different. How could the song with lyrics that Lee Hyunjae agonized over, meticulously crafting each sentence, be less popular than the song with lyrics I wrote when I was like, ‘Ugh, whatever. Let’s give up. This sucks!’?

“Actually, this is how algorithms work, how memes work, how the internet world is supposed to be. My chances of attracting new fans are extremely low, so wouldn’t you say I’m a prime example of a valiant loser?”

What’s ‘valiant loser’? Speak in complete sentences, you damn MZ generation [Millennial and Generation Z] kid.

“Are you making fun of me right now, Hyunjae?”

Lee Hyunjae nodded with a clear, faint smile.

“A little bit.”

Lee Hyunjae, who had been looking into my eyes, waved his hand.

“Don’t get any weird ideas. I was honored just to sing that song. It made the world look so different.”

I still don’t know if that was the right thing to do. Ethics are always so difficult. Looking at you now, I feel good seeing you so proud of yourself, but sometimes the messages in the blocked list bother me, Hyunjae.

“Anyway, it looks like it’ll keep climbing. The video has a certain crazy charm… Hyung [older brother or male friend], wouldn’t everyone who watches Mental Classroom find it funny? Like Professor Ji’s double life.”

“…No way.”

“They’re already enjoying it that way? They call you Professor Ji, Professor Chae.”

To all the great scholars across the country, please forgive my lack of virtue. No, even if it’s not my lack of virtue, whatever. I’ve tarnished your names.

“Of course, it’s not so much that the song is popular… it feels more like it’s become a meme.”

“That’s a relief.”

I would have been heartbroken if that had become my signature song. I like the melody, but I really don’t like the lyrics. I’ll revise them someday and include it on an album.

To think that my duet with Chae Hamin is in that state… I would have stopped it somehow if it weren’t for Monthly Ji Donghwa.

* * *

But, I never expected this to happen. To think that this would happen during a temporary gathering of the arrangement team for a mid-term evaluation.

I didn’t bother hiding my expression, which was rotting away as I watched the trainees humming the melodies without properly pronouncing the lyrics.

Because.

“…Hello.”

“Hello, Professor!”

Everyone’s not scared anymore, damn it. It’s like they found out that the foul-mouthed country grandma is actually warm-hearted.

Of course.

“Complacency is the root of all evil.”

Anyone can ruin the atmosphere without even studying. You called me professor, so I’ll bring back the memories from when I was briefly in college, trainees.

“Today is feedback day, and it seems like there will be many things that surprise me today. I am very much looking forward to how many good songs will enchant my ears.”

Heh, this is called thesis revision.

I’m holding a blue pen to give reassurance instead of an aggressive red pen, but I plan to write the content of the revisions as if I’m digging into your hearts. I don’t know much about it because I’ve never received major criticism in revisions, but I’ve heard it doesn’t feel good.

And our trainees know.

That our grandma, although warm-hearted, is a perfectionist who doesn’t allow even a speck of dust in her room, so she can’t allow even her beloved grandchildren to enter her room with dusty shoes.

A chilling sense of tension. PD [Production Director], I’m working this hard. Look how much I’m trying for the broadcast. I’m faithfully following the instruction, ‘Please create a slightly scary atmosphere today!’

“Twenty of you were eliminated this time, and eight of you who will be clashing with me a lot have survived.”

A squirrel sat in its seat and nodded. Twenty out of a hundred, 20%. It’s a relief that the arrangement members were also eliminated at an average rate, if you can call it that. No, but how can twenty people disappear in the first elimination?

“In ‘Collage,’ which can be said to be the first full-fledged unit battle.”

“Cough.”

“I know it’s funny, but the production team told me to do it this way.”

In my opinion, there’s someone on the production team who’s really serious about art, so it’s like this.

“Anyway, in Collage, you’ve probably heard that you need to form a collage as team leaders. I will focus on giving feedback on whether the composition allows all members to stand out or not.”

Create a stage that can show the individuality of each team member. That’s the only rule of the competition.

“If there isn’t at least one consideration for each team member, I will relentlessly demand rework. If you let me know that you’ve identified the individuality of the team members, I will check if that can be confirmed in the arrangement.”

Buzzing. The stage is in three days, the mid-term check is in one day. Demanding rework is just another way of saying, ‘Screw you.’

I don’t want to do this either, but it seems like what the production team wants is a situation where the trainees’ mental states collapse.

“…It seems like the evaluation criteria were revealed late!”

One of the trainees said something very right. How commendable.

“That’s right. I deliberately asked them to reveal it late.”

And what I said is also right. I asked them that way without an ounce of lie.

“Arranging with the team in mind is a given. You can’t argue that it’s a problem that the fact that getting high scores on the exam is good wasn’t announced in advance, can you?”

I doubt that anyone who arranges would only do it for their own greed, but you never know. Maybe they focused on arranging only the parts where they would stand out with a selfish mindset. That’s not a collage, it’s dissonance.

What I realized after spending three years as an idol is that if there’s someone in the team who can arrange, they must be able to increase the overall quality while also showing the individuality of the members. Otherwise, the seeds of conflict will be planted.

It’s a doggone hard job, but I hope they accept it willingly in exchange for being on camera for even one more second.

“Then shall we listen to the arrangement that considers ‘everyone’?”

Gulp. The sound of swallowing. I feel strangely good. Maybe I wouldn’t have been bad as a professor in my past life.

[You’re a pervert!]

Trying to teach is a psychology that even children have. It’s a famous story that if you ask a child who doesn’t organize properly, ‘Where should this be organized?’ they will teach you and organize it themselves.

[You’re just having fun tormenting them!]

Shh, that’s a secret, you little rascal.

** *

“…Combining all the reasons I’ve explained so far, it seems that the considerations you wrote down have not been reflected in the song. I request a rework.”

The second death sentence. Really, it hurts my heart. To send two teams to hell with my own mouth like this. How could I do this.

[Heart rate normal, but when scanning the brain, considering the activation of the amygdala in the limbic system and the activation of the prefrontal cortex in the left brain, the current emotional state is closer to ‘pleasantness’ or ‘enjoyment.’]

I know. It’s fun. These two really focused on their own parts. You should be grateful that I didn’t mention it so that the viewers wouldn’t talk about your personalities.

The PD probably wants me to say it, but who cares. I heard the ratings are already good.

After the trainee who had a despairing expression in front of me went back, I let out a slight sigh. Should I go and give a lecture when the camera is off, or would that be presumptuous? I don’t know.

“Next is trainee Eungu. Please let us hear it.”

Oh, dear, it’s the same expression Chae Hamin had during the survival show. Looking tense but pretending not to be, acting self-important.

“H-Here, here’s the plan!”

“Thank you.”

I played the practice video and looked at the plan. Quickly going back and forth, checking if it was properly reflected. A task of not looking at the skill at all and only looking at the intention. After finishing the second-by-second analysis in my head, I frowned.

“…Giving in isn’t always a virtue.”

It’s not convincing at all when I say that. I didn’t listen to what Chae Hamin told me so many times, and now I’m reciting it myself.

“There’s one member you didn’t properly consider, and it’s a little unfortunate that it’s Eungu.”

How could you do this? Is it a calculation that doing this will get you good editing?

Well, looking at the editing of the previous episodes, there’s a good chance that Eungu will be edited that way.

“…Yes.”

But looking at the expression, it doesn’t seem like it. Seeing that the expression is full of ‘I knew it,’ it seems like the possibility of conflict is high.

Or maybe she’s someone who doesn’t know how to properly express her intentions, but considering that she’s the one who said something unpleasant to me first, the possibility is low.

“Um…, I don’t know what happened within the team, but it’s not to the point of rework. If you want, you can proceed as is.”

That’s all I can say right now.

* * *

After the filming, I approached the two who had requested rework and quietly whispered in their ears, ‘I know you did something shitty, but I didn’t mention it considering your face, so please come to your senses,’ in a very polite manner.

And finally, our Eungu. She was happily talking with Hanjin, who is an illegal sampler [someone who uses unauthorized samples in their music], but I could see that her expression was heavy. I tapped her shoulder once.

“Eungu.”

She flinched.

“Yes?!”

Am I going to kill her? I’m sad that I’ve removed a lot of the psychopath image, but it seems like it’s still attached.

“Can you tell me what happened?”

“…Ah, that’s.”

Eungu looked at Hanjin next to her with a troubled expression. Hanjin seemed to be conveying the message, ‘Tell me, I’ll kill them all. I was already annoyed,’ with his handsome face.

“Um, there was a bit of a fight, so I was mediating the fight.”

“Oh, dear.”

I feel like I know without even looking. I don’t know what it’s like to want to survive. They’re making a fuss to take good positions, so she gave up her position and made peace. It’s not a bad choice. There may be more to gain than ruining the team atmosphere.

“Ahem.”

Hanjin’s clearing of his throat. A signal that there’s something more. I smiled and quietly looked down at Eungu. Psychologically, a person can pressure the other person with subtle gestures, postures, and expressions alone.

I learned it when I was living alone to analyze what others were doing, but I use it a lot after becoming an idol. It’s the same when I’m tormenting our senior Junseong. After all, the saying that the only bad things to learn are alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs is not wrong.

“…That.”

“I’m just curious. Why did you make that choice?”

It’s because you’re one of the people who are crazy about practicing, so I care about you. It’s ethically problematic for a person who doesn’t work to exploit a person who works. If Marx comes back to life, he’ll nod.

“Ah…….”

A subtle sense of pressure and a word that loosens it, people tend to find a place to lean on in the midst of pressure.

If there’s a simple choice in front of you that says ‘liberation if you speak,’ and breaking the silence doesn’t go against your values, wouldn’t anyone want to speak?

“Actually…….”

A long story. After hearing all the circumstances, I nodded, thanked her, and turned around. Eungu seemed to be relieved at my unchanging expression, and Hanjin seemed to be expressing regret. And as I left the building and got into the car, I quietly muttered.

“Ugh, how annoying.”

How should I screw over these damn bourgeois [members of the middle class] ? I’m dying to see tomorrow’s mid-term check.