Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 209

Including Seok-jun, who was going to be tormented even more because he could compose music. Seeing the individual reactions of the five members, I could tell that all of them were cooperating with me with one heart and mind, and also ‘voluntarily.’

“Um, hyung [older brother or male friend], is that how you use the word ‘voluntary’?”

“Yeah.”

Anyway, you guys can overpower me and leave if you put in a little effort. The fact that you’re not leaving despite that is proof of your autonomy.

* * *

Back at the showcase, Lee Hyun-jae nodded, reminiscing about the past.

“He was the ideal dictator himself. He justified his domination with strange logic and kept buying us food… It was exactly as I read in books.”

If he ever had to be a dictator, he planned to refer to Ji Dong-hwa from that time. Ji Dong-hwa shook his head at Lee Hyun-jae’s words.

“Anyway, the song was completed well, right?”

“Making the people voluntarily obey with achievements is also complete dictatorship…”

“Shhh.”

“Still, I think it’s worth being dominated to this extent.”

As Lee Hyun-jae said, Ryu Iden entered voluntary obedience mode as if he had been brainwashed.

“If you listen to Dong-hwa, at least nothing will go wrong.”

Ji Dong-hwa chuckled at the dangerous thought, but he didn’t seem too upset. He had reached a point where he could somewhat enjoy the frame that the members created, like a cruel aristocrat or a cat.

What is rational consumption?

The word ‘rational’ is said to mean ‘suitable for the purpose and without being excessive.’ A man who had finished the college entrance exam and succeeded in the grueling art college entrance process stopped his hand while looking at the Blossoms album purchase site.

“How many are you going to buy?”

His friend’s words. The only person who knows that the idol he stans [enthusiastically supports] is a male idol.

“…I don’t know. I want to go to the fansign [fan signing event].”

The experience of not being able to properly stan during his exam life remained in his heart like some kind of resentment, so he worked part-time as an assistant at an art academy and saved money like crazy.

“You’re amazing. Do male fans usually go to fansigns?”

“I’ve come too far to quit because of that.”

His background picture is already Chae Ha-min. Regardless of being a male fan or anything else, stanning, which started with the feeling of being comforted by a neighborhood hyung, has already become a habit. The self-esteem he gained from rising to the ranks of golden hands [talented artists] with fan art posted on social media is also indescribable.

“Are you going to pull an all-nighter tonight?”

“…No. It’s the comeback today.”

Getting eliminated from the showcase is a lifelong regret. He plans to leave the homework to tomorrow’s self for a while and enjoy only the fun now.

More importantly, it is important to determine what rational consumption is now. ‘Purpose: To win the fansign’, ‘Not excessive: To be able to eat three meals a day without borrowing money from parents’, if these two conditions are met, it is rational.

“Twenty copies?”

“Do you have to do that much?”

“Shut up, you spent a million won [Korean currency, roughly $800 USD] on games yesterday.”

“I can’t resist gacha [a type of loot box mechanic in video games].”

He is so cheerful that you can’t imagine he was once a person who cried and drew in a narrow studio apartment. His friend also knew how hard he had worked and how much he had recovered through stanning.

Perhaps that’s why, when this foolish man declared that he would spend the money he had earned on albums, his friend didn’t stop him, but rather understood. He’s not the kind of person whose judgment is so poor that he’ll ruin himself by stanning.

“Then let’s watch it together in my room.”

“…What, the showcase?”

At his friend’s words, he stared at him with a puzzled look, wondering ‘Why is he making such a fuss?’, but just nodded. The dormitory is too crowded to turn up the volume, but his friend’s house, who is half-crazy about anime, has excellent soundproofing and speaker equipment. It’s not easy to refuse to go and freeload.

“Is your homework okay?”

“It’s just boring to do it alone.”

That’s right. The real taste of pulling an all-nighter is watching each other go crazy. If you touch the tablet with a hazy mind, a lot of crazy things happen.

“I’m happy to.”

* * *

This album was a legend update from the concept photos. Honestly, I don’t know what the concept is, but the photos that contain the appearance of being shipwrecked on an island made of junk were visually beautiful from the colors to the atmosphere.

Perhaps because of his characteristics as an art student, he doesn’t know much about music, but he has knowledge of colors, composition, and arrangement, so he only saw these things.

“Is this your bias [favorite member]?”

“Yeah, if you think about it.”

He’s the kindest rich neighborhood hyung.

“Don’t say ‘this’ to my hyung, it makes me feel bad.”

“Um, you’re being ridiculous…”

“Can I diss your bias too?”

“Sorry.”

Anyway, he turned his gaze back to his phone. Sleeveless and slacks, but slightly worn clothes, and junk scattered all over the world, broken clocks, torn photos, and the like. I don’t know the symbolic meaning well. Cheerful and transparent colors are laid on the base.

Chae Ha-min’s hands were smeared with reddish pink paint. Sitting diagonally, Chae Ha-min’s eyes are faintly lowered, gazing at his hands. I don’t know this well either, but it is clear that it is sparkling.

How much more do I have to study to compose the screen like this? The quality is too good for a pre-release concept photo, so I want to open the album quickly.

“They definitely put a lot of effort into it. Good arrangement. Makes Ha-min stand out.”

“Right?”

“How does that person digest that color? I can’t digest pink when I wear clothes.”

“Um, this is the best visually.”

He turned the photo a few times to show Ji Dong-hwa’s pre-release concept photo. If Chae Ha-min has a bright but faint feeling in the composition, arrangement, and gaze, Ji Dong-hwa felt dark and damp.

A warehouse with black liquid spread wide, Ji Dong-hwa wearing pure white clothes in the cracks of countless dark brown oak boxes.

Both hands and clothes were stained with black paint, and he was sitting in the center of the screen as if abandoned, staring at the screen with indifferent eyes. The blue light was on, so I felt uneasy.

Personally, I evaluated that it was a screen that perfectly matched Ji Dong-hwa’s usual image.

“It looks like a doctor’s gown.”

“Looks like it? I’m not interested in the world view…”

“That’s the basics of stanning.”

He continued to move his finger to the next photo.

Accordingly, Lee Hyun-jae, dressed neatly like a young master in a white room with red lighting and sitting quietly on a chair with his hands clasped, staring straight ahead with a blank expression, Ryu Iden smiling brightly on a mossy place with junk, and Seok-jun smiling while holding a purple doll in achromatic colors passed by.

“He’s the villain.”

“Who?”

“The one sitting alone in a room without junk.”

Who cares.

“Hey, the showcase is starting now.”

“Okay, I understand what you mean by shutting up.”

The countdown begins on the stage that fills the huge TV screen. The fact that the comeback show is broadcast means that its commercial value has been recognized, so I already feel high.

“Our hyungs, they succeeded.”

“Ugh, you’re such a stan.”

A room that is incomparably wider than the studio apartment he used to live in, a TV that is rude to compare with a mobile phone screen, and even booming speakers. Comparing it makes me feel sorry for my past studio apartment days, but it’s okay. It’s enough if I’m satisfied now.

* * *

Before the title stage, he took a breath. Originally, the stage is a comprehensive art. It must be visually beautiful, and the music you hear goes without saying.

I heard that Blossoms’ most basic concept is ‘children from noble families’, but from the stage reminiscent of a ruined temple to the worn clothes, it was as if the children from noble families were suffering.

“Wow, they’re handsome.”

He lightly ignored his friend’s words. He was now possessed by the art director of a stage, so he was busy sharply analyzing the screen here and there. The costumes have a high-teen atmosphere. The core colors seen in the concept photos were included as points.

“Title … It’s poetic.”

The members lying down with their heads resting on each other’s legs and Chae Ha-min sitting alone in the center. As the song began, the members raised their hands and fluttered. It’s as soft as swaying in the wind. When Chae Ha-min, who dyed his hair orange, smiled with his eyes folded, the stage was flooded with light and brightened.

Cherry blossoms that are stepped on when walking alone

Thinking that I laughed while walking together

Chae Ha-min grabbed Ryu Iden’s hand fluttering in front of him and leaned his forehead as if it were precious. If you let go of your hand, the hand that falls weakly looks like a weak petal falling at the end of spring.

Even if I pretend to be okay

I think I need time to sort things out

If you only listen to the lyrics, it sounds like a difficult situation, but the mid-tempo and slightly exciting synth line made me feel like I was in cognitive dissonance.

Behind Chae Ha-min, Ji Dong-hwa got up and moved to the left side of the stage, raising his gaze as if watching the cherry blossoms fall. Surprisingly, the faint appearance suited him well, so I was surprised.

Cherry, blossom, fall

Your scent that I felt faintly in between

Cherry, blossom, fall

The sweet words we exchanged

Ji Dong-hwa reached out and pulled it into his arms as if he were holding something precious.

Precious but now

I think it’s falling

Because of the gaze taken away by Ji Dong-hwa, the formation that I didn’t know was completed came into my eyes. Movements with smooth lines like soft modern dance with relaxed strength, Ryu Iden’s arm, who reduced his body shape for this comeback, continued the line beautifully.

The gestures drawing a streamline from top to bottom reminded me of the moment when the cherry blossoms fell.

“The melody is like a love song, but the lyrics are a breakup song.”

“That person is the composer, but he’s a bit of a weird hyung…”

In the midst of the scattered conversation, the speaker slammed and echoed like the fluttering heartbeat when you fall in love for the first time. It contained the faint and melancholic atmosphere of spring and a strange vitality.

Behind Lee Hyun-jae in the center, the other members danced a loose choreography, attracting attention to Lee Hyun-jae in the center. Lee Hyun-jae digested the high notes smoothly with his improved skills thanks to his last solo song.

Cherry blossoms, falling, slowly and quickly

Cover all the roads I walked with you

Cherry blossoms, falling, but beautifully

Even if I don’t take it out again

The bursting symphony was powerful as if symbolizing the end.

The choreography in which the movements of the members, including Ji Dong-hwa, seemed to overlap but did not overlap, continued smoothly as if meetings and partings were intersecting. The choreographer declared as soon as he heard Ji Dong-hwa’s song, ‘The end and the beginning are originally attached!’, and conceived the movement.

In the meantime, Ji Dong-hwa, who made eye contact with Ryu Iden, smiled and turned his head, and Ryu Iden smiled even brighter and jumped back into the movement.

On the stage full of spring light, the set like a ruined temple looked like a foundation to build something new. Lights of various colors fell softly on the stage and tickled my eyes. I couldn’t help but think it was a splendid stage.

“I want to decorate it like this.”

“You can do it if you pour money into it.”

“With my skills?”

“What’s wrong with you, you’re the top student. Are you trash, are you being arrogant? Tell me how many awards you’ve received. What about me, who felt self-conscious after seeing your portfolio?”

“…I’ll buy you dinner as an apology.”

“It’s okay, I was going to do it, originally.”

Even while exchanging various conversations with his friend, his gaze was fixed on the screen and did not fall. It came like a cliché that I thought he was a neighborhood hyung, but it turned out that he was a child from a well-off family.

Cherry, blossom, fall

Forever under these cherry blossom petals

Cherry, blossom, fall

I’ll bury my memories with you

Unlike the first stage, the members were sitting with their backs against each other. Unlike the first start, which expressed falling petals, they are sitting together small but firmly like newly sprouted seedlings.

A new semester, the end of something is a new beginning, the stage declares that the season of spring is full of such meaning. He admired and sparkled his eyes.

“…The song is exciting. It’s a breakup song, but it’s exciting.”

His friend liked the song much more than the stage and hummed the chorus and rode the rhythm. He felt unpleasant that the sanctuary was trampled on, but he quietly closed his mouth because he knew that this house belonged to his friend.

“Right. He’s a really weird hyung.”

* * *

Interviews following the stage, a precious time to hear the members’ production stories.

―What was your motivation for composing? Did you get inspiration from somewhere?

Asked the host. He was full of expectations. A moment to find out how he wrote such a good song! I guess I can’t help but be interested in the word ‘inspiration’ because I’m an art student.

But the moment he received the question, the members looked at Ji Dong-hwa with worried eyes. As if afraid of the words that would come out of his mouth soon.

―I was inspired by the junkyard.

“…Junkyard?”

His friend, who had been humming that the song was good until just now, frowned.

“Really, a weird hyung…”

If you stay up all night like eating rice, will you change like that? He was a little afraid that the all-nighters like everyday life would make him like that.