Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 215

I Didn’t Plan to Be an Idol – Episode 215

Should I just let it go? I hesitated for about three seconds, but the rising irritation made me point it out. And the response I got was an admission that it was a ‘purely original creation.’

Not saying anything is just annoying, but spouting lies is an unacceptable act of dishonesty.

While other trainees were staying up all night for days to compete with their skills, this person sampled a song that, while not famous, was guaranteed to be high quality, and then acted as if that part was also their own. PD-nim’s [Production Director] instructions and concept be damned, I felt sorry for the efforts of the other trainees, so I left the strongest possible warning.

The note hastily delivered by PD-nim contained a resigned phrase: ‘It’s okay to just give your honest assessment!’ To make them give up on their concept from the very first evaluation, the crime is severe. At this point, I half gave up on thinking about how it would be edited.

I gave an awkward smile to Senior Lukachi, who was chuckling as he looked at the note next to me, and prepared for the evaluation. ‘Worthless’ is something one person can only declare once, and since I made a mess of things at the beginning, there shouldn’t be any more ‘extreme rage’ to come, right?

…That expectation was immediately shattered in the next performance.

I didn’t have any prejudice just because it was an unfamiliar agency. Seeing the two of them come out cheerfully smiling was even heartwarming. Moreover, when I realized that the song that started after a brief conversation was ‘Cloudy Blue,’ I felt a strange sense of pride.

That was until these guys opened their mouths to sing and dance. If it were a high school festival stage, I would have applauded with a happy heart, but it was far too unqualified to prove that they had worked hard for their dreams.

And most of all, what was most irritating.

“Um, was the arrangement done by the company?”

“W-We did it ourselves…….”

Anyone would think I was scolding them.

“The vocal and dance evaluations are the same as the other judges’ opinions, so I don’t have much more to say, but I would like to add that I think you should have the company do the arrangement until you build up more skill. It was the worst arrangement I could think of.”

No matter what anyone says, it’s my song. Watching someone ruin my song right in front of my eyes makes me so irritated I could die.

‘This isn’t a song written for substandard people like you to sing, it’s a song written for prepared beasts like our members,’ the words rose to the tip of my throat, but I held them back.

This time, the broadcasting station said they would support self-production, and that people who could arrange songs were welcome to do so, but if they were going to do it so terribly, it would have been better not to do it at all.

“Of course, I enjoyed the performance.”

“…Enjoyed it, really?”

Senior Lukachi muttered with a questioning voice without holding the microphone.

Ryoo Iden taught me that it’s polite to say at least one word of enjoyment to those who worked hard to dance and sing in front of you, so I’m just faithfully following that.

* * *

“I don’t like unfounded confidence. If you brought a self-composed song, it means you were confident, but maybe it’s just me, I couldn’t find that basis in the song.”

Gulp, ‘I can’t figure out how you even thought of coming to a skill evaluation with that kind of song,’ is what he meant.

“Your dancing skills are excellent. However, one thing that’s a shame is that this isn’t a place to pick dancers. Your breathing is unstable, so your pitch wavers too often, making me feel uneasy.”

Gulp, ‘You can only dance, and your singing is terribly awful,’ is what he meant.

Park Eun-gu waited in the waiting room for his upcoming evaluation stage, and as Ji Dong-hwa’s polite but terrifying criticisms occasionally burst out, he became increasingly intimidated.

If it were criticism from someone who couldn’t sing, dance, or compose properly, it wouldn’t be so scary. But because someone who can do everything is picking apart every little thing, it feels like being beaten to the bone.

“Ha, damn it, I’m nervous.”

Two people appeared from God-A [God-Entertainement’s Team A]. The song prepared this time was a solo arrangement of ‘The Time Waiting for You,’ chosen because he wanted to impress Senior Ji Dong-hwa. He even arranged it himself.

Recalling that the people before him brought out ‘Cloudy Blue’ and received a barrage of insults—polite evaluations that were no different from insults—made his breathing quicken, and he felt like he was going crazy.

The guy sitting next to him, with a carefree look, said something relaxed and seemingly without regret, ‘Well, it’ll be fine,’ but he couldn’t stop the rising tension.

“Hey, Gu, why are you so nervous?”

“Shut up, hyung [older brother/male friend], I feel like I’m going to die right now.”

“Dong-hwa sunbaenim [senior] will think of the old days and be lenient—”

“Hyung, you came in late, so you don’t know, but that hyung isn’t that kind of person. He’s like a robot…….”

If I get criticized for the arrangement today, it’ll be like committing suicide on the way to the dorm. What should I do? I don’t want to die like this. Ah, but still, dying at the hands of someone I respect, would that be an honor? Mumbling, all sorts of sounds flowed out of Park Eun-gu’s mouth like chanting.

“Why is that dying at Dong-hwa sunbaenim’s hands? It’s just suicide, isn’t it?”

“Ji-sang hyung, shut up, please…….”

Ji-sang silently watched the scene of Park Eun-gu collapsing with a sulky expression before striking him in the solar plexus. It was a promise between the two, that if one person couldn’t come to their senses, the other person would definitely hit that person’s solar plexus.

With a groan that sounded like something was bursting, and a look that asked if he was crazy, Ji-sang stroked Eun-gu’s solar plexus with a satisfied grin, humming, ‘Daddy’s hand is medicine.’

“You’re not going to commit suicide like that. You’re just going to be so nervous that you won’t be able to show off your skills and then commit suicide.”

“…Hyung is, really, so carefree, I envy you.”

“That’s why I got picked here, right?”

That’s right. Sometimes, in the idol scene, there are cases where a strange charm that only people who seem to have no attachment to life have receives people’s love. Ji-sang, that guy is that type, damn it. Park Eun-gu bit his lip.

“Your makeup is smudging!”

It doesn’t fit, it doesn’t fit at all. The only close friend I have in the company is this kind of person.

“Sorry I can’t comfort you, I’m not good at it.”

“…I know. Hyung, you’re being a pain in the ass to relieve my tension.”

“You’re too foul-mouthed. Are you really an idol trainee?”

“Even if I don’t have any fans yet, would they be the same as hyung if I did?”

“Am I not precious?”

“…I’m grateful, but shut up.”

And Park Eun-gu continued to focus on deep breathing until the staff called him, and Ji-sang, next to Park Eun-gu, listened to this arrangement version and warmed up.

* * *

Finally, when he went on stage and greeted everyone, and when he met Ji Dong-hwa’s cold gaze, Park Eun-gu’s body stiffened completely.

Ji Eun-young, a senior ballad singer, opened her mouth as if she found it cute.

“This time, it’s God-Entertainement people. Your senior group is hot these days, right?”

“Come to think of it, Dong-hwa hoobae [junior] was originally from God-Entertainement, wasn’t he? Are you guys connected?”

Park Eun-gu gave up on his expectations. He was someone who had lived alone in the world from the beginning. No friends. Did everything he had to do. Did it well. A genius. Numerous words that modified Ji Dong-hwa floated in his head.

“Trainee Ji-sang is a stranger to me, but…”

Huh?

“I’ve met trainee Eun-gu before.”

His breath caught in his throat. I’m nervous, what should I do? The person he had aspired to be like when he was a trainee, how could this be.

“I took composition lessons with him.”

“…Wow, crazy.”

As Park Eun-gu muttered, Ji-sang nonchalantly smiled and struck Eun-gu in the solar plexus.

“Gu, get a grip.”

“Cough, cough, huh.”

Lukachi burst into cheerful laughter.

“Are you guys helping each other get a grip?”

“Do you decide on things like that when you’re in a group?”

Kim Seung-ho, famous for choreography, also laughed and asked.

“Yes, not something excessive like hitting the solar plexus, though.”

“No, why are you doing that? Did you have a bad relationship with Dong-hwa ssi [Mr.]?”

“Ah, no! I really, respect, respect, uh, he was a really, cool hyung…….”

His hands move haphazardly. The pain in his solar plexus is quickly forgotten, and only the gaze of Ji Dong-hwa, who is subtly smiling in front of him, and Ji-sang, who is looking at him with concern from the side, are intense. Ah, damn it, I’ve ruined my first impression.

“Really? Did he bully you or something? He’s being brutally honest today.”

“Hey, it’s more like fact-bombing than brutal honesty. The truth was the truth, after all…….”

“I don’t know when I was brutally honest.”

“It’s scary because I think you really don’t know, Dong-hwa hoobae.”

“I just said it with the hope that it would be helpful…….”

“It’s even scarier because that’s genuine.”

Ji Dong-hwa smiled slightly and nodded. He was looking down at Park Eun-gu with a warm gaze—purely Park Eun-gu’s thought.

“Anyway, I remember him as a friend who worked hard. I’m looking forward to seeing how you’ve grown. Show us your stage, please?”

Clutching the microphone tightly, standing in his original position, waiting for the prelude that would soon flow out, Park Eun-gu struck Ji-sang’s arm repeatedly to relieve his tension. Ji-sang only nodded as if he was used to it.

* * *

When the silence descended after the stage ended, Park Eun-gu took a deep breath. He felt like he was going to collapse. Glancing at Ji Dong-hwa, he felt like he was going to die of fear.

He didn’t know. That he would evaluate him so coldly. That he would say reasonable things in the most calm and polite way. Even while the other judges were all clapping and laughing, he alone was completely expressionless, which made it even worse.

“Can I speak first?”

It’s the first time. That he’s stepping up to speak first. There have been a total of eight teams so far.

“First of all, did you arrange it yourself?”

“…Yes.”

What should I do, oh my god. As his voice trembled, the other judges all laughed. What is it, ridicule? The paranoia that was starting was eating away at his mind. He’s terrified of the death sentence that will come out of that mouth.

“It was good.”

“…Yes?”

Ji Dong-hwa looked at Park Eun-gu’s reaction as if he was puzzled, and then, thinking, ‘Ah, this guy doesn’t understand,’ he continued to speak.

“Um, should I point out a few things?”

The explanation that followed was full of musical terms. Park Eun-gu’s mouth dropped open at the fact that he had analyzed his arrangement in units of seconds. How he changed the instruments, why it was good to change the part arrangement, the words poured out.

“Ah, uh…….”

And then, Park Eun-gu’s legs gave way and he collapsed.

* * *

What, crazy. Why are you collapsing? Other people didn’t collapse even when they were cursed to hell.

“No, I mean, you’re talking too scary, so the trainee is collapsing, Dong-hwa hoobae!”

Lukachi and Ji Eun-young giggled and scolded me. It’s unfair, it’s a problem to say that something good is good.

“Ah, Ji-sang is so relaxed, it’s comfortable just to look at him. How can his dance lines be so beautiful?”

“I don’t know much about arrangement, so I listened mainly to the song, and his basics are solid and good. He’s suitable for R or S [high grades]. Of course, he needs to practice more, though.”

“Congratulations on being the first team that Dong-hwa ssi praised for their arrangement today!”

No, I found a raw gem that was still usable in a pile of trash, so I couldn’t help but praise it. Isn’t it the same principle as when you’re doing a five-person team project in college, and if only one person other than the team leader participates diligently, that one person looks pretty?

“This isn’t praise because of connections, is it?”

As Lukachi cautiously whispered in my ear, my brow naturally furrowed.

“Actually, I don’t even remember talking to that friend.”

“Yeah…, I should suspect what I should suspect. He’s someone who’s not even going to the company dinner today…….”

Chae Hamin and Seok-joon came early today and told me to come play.

“It feels like Iden is the only one building connections.”

And on this day, I watched the stages of a total of 40 teams, finished with thirty criticisms, eight praises, and two rave reviews, and was called by the judges ‘a friend who proved that you can really kill people with the truth’.