Becoming An Idol Wasn’T On My Plan [EN]: Chapter 279

While Ryu Iden went to talk to Mok-hwa, I ate a few pieces of meat and put them down.

So, I can really do anything. It’s a broadcast where no one restricts you.

Should I cook for these guys?

I suddenly had that thought. I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t been able to cook for them often.

As I got up, Chae Hamin, who was sitting next to me, turned to me with a question mark on his face.

“Is there anything you want to eat?”

I stopped by the mart before coming here and bought a lot of ingredients, so I should be able to make most things. I also brought some seasonings from the dorm.

“Oh, um, uh…, ah.”

What’s wrong, Hamin? Is your language composition not working?

“I was thinking of taking some time out of my week to really learn how to cook, Dong-hwa.”

“I don’t want to limit the possibilities you have……”

I couldn’t bring myself to say that it would be wiser to give up.

Nor could I say, ‘Let’s just pay a fair wage and hire someone to cook for us, Hamin. We have money, and this is a capitalist society.’

Lee Hyunjae laughed at my lament.

“That’s the most polite criticism I’ve ever heard, hyung [older brother/male friend].”

Chae Hamin moved his rice bowl to the side and buried his face in it. Then, he rubbed his cheek as if he were sulking.

What are you doing getting meat grease on your face, Hamin-ah [term of endearment]?

“Ugh, I want to be good at cooking too. I want to feed you guys until you’re full.”

“Why—?”

Seok-joon mumbled, stuffing his cheeks with food. He seemed more interested in the food than the conversation.

“There’s just something about it.”

Chae Hamin lifted his head, his cheeks slightly glistening. I handed him a tissue and sat down.

When are you going to tell me the menu? I want to cook like you do, right now.

“Ah, seeing the members working so hard, I sometimes want to make them a warm meal. I get that feeling.”

“So, when you step into the kitchen, you usually end up making a warm plate of poison.”

“Ugh!”

Lee Hyunjae’s words, spat out with a laugh, hit Chae Hamin like an arrow.

Wounded, Chae Hamin buried his face in his hands.

“Only Dong-hwa hyung has the resistance to eat it all. I’m sometimes curious about Dong-hwa hyung’s stomach. I want to open it up and see what kind of digestion process it goes through.”

A snicker escaped.

I really don’t know what to do if you say you want to cut open my stomach with that expression and see what my stomach looks like, Hyunjae.

“That’s the most rude criticism I’ve ever heard, Hyunjae.”

“I’m sorry. But, while I really love Hamin hyung’s concern for us, I couldn’t love his cooking.”

Chae Hamin let out a sigh and leaned back in his chair.

“Why am I so bad at cooking? Dong-hwa, I’m sad.”

“I’ll support you if you’re going to try.”

“Really? It’s a bit much to say this, but even my mom told me to give up. Is it okay?”

“Wouldn’t you improve if you did it for about ten years? I’ll eat it once you make it.”

In fact, I can survive as long as I get enough nutrients, even if it doesn’t taste good. The pleasure of gourmet food isn’t that big in my life.

“Ten years……”

Chae Hamin narrowed his brows as if estimating how long that time was. Lee Hyunjae, who was watching him, suddenly said,

“Come to think of it, almost all the dreams I had ten years ago have come true.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Except for one that’s off-limits, I debuted, I have a solo song, and I get along well with the members. I can’t believe it.”

Lee Hyunjae put down his chopsticks and looked up at the night sky.

After enjoying the starry sky for a moment, he dropped his head and laughed. I was a little curious about what that off-limits thing was, but I didn’t ask.

“Thank you. It’s all thanks to you guys.”

With those words, Lee Hyunjae buried his face in his rice bowl as if embarrassed and put meat in his mouth.

“Hey, Hyunjae. You lived in the practice room every day. I’ve never seen you not in the vocal room on your days off! I should be thanking you.”

Chae Hamin slammed the table and shouted.

“Um, but if that’s the case, hyung is the same. The number of times you rent the practice room……”

I quietly added. Seok-joon wouldn’t appeal to this at all because of his personality.

“Dong-hwa hyung is the best.”

Ryu Iden, who had finished his call, plopped down in his seat. His eyes were full of mischief. I’m dying to know what he heard.

“The kids were saying.”

“Ah, that’s right. I’ve said it before. When Dong-hwa hyung is in the studio on his days off, it’s like my body just knows and……”

“Me too! I’m going to the practice room after Dong-hwa.”

What is it? Why all of a sudden? Knowing that I’m the least immune to this kind of atmosphere, damn it.

I maintained a blank expression and met Ryu Iden’s eyes. I sent him a look that said, ‘Why are you suddenly acting up?’ and he just smiled.

“I go to the studio every day watching Iden hyung.”

“Huh?”

“Every morning, I wake up early, even though I haven’t slept for a few hours, and I wanted to repay you for exercising and taking care of our schedule with my work.”

“I’m working hard watching you work hard?”

Sparks flying.

The content is heartwarming, but there is a fierce fight between me and Ryu Iden.

It’s similar to the day we argued about why we should be the leader, but now we have no shame in praising each other.

“That’s right, Iden hyung is also respectable.”

Lee Hyunjae noticed and immediately took my side.

“Not as good as Dong-hwa hyung.”

“They say you should evaluate yourself with the standards of diligence and evaluate others with the standards of generosity.”

I carefully took a sip of water.

The movement of the hand holding the cup drew attention. It’s a way to focus attention that I learned from Hwa-yang.

“You want yourself to be more diligent, so I can’t help but look more diligent, but that’s because you’re generous. You have all the qualities to be a leader. I respect you.”

“Wow.”

Ryu Iden covered his mouth and laughed.

“Isn’t that the same for you?”

“Not at all. I just thought I wanted to be like hyung.”

Ryu Iden opened his mouth for a moment and stared blankly at me as if he had nothing to say.

The moment Ryu Iden said ‘you too,’ he admitted that he was, and I just had to deny it.

When stacking logic, you can’t use even one particle carelessly.

In fact, if Ryu Iden had lived in the medieval West, he would have become a high-ranking clergyman. Because he’s diligent and generous to his people.

And I probably would have written articles about atheism or skepticism and been burned at the stake. I’m the kind of guy who can’t be generous to others.

But this isn’t a debate, and there’s something beyond logic in this world.

“Liar! You would have locked yourself in the studio even without Iden! I stopped you so many times! I haven’t said it lately, but really!”

Chae Hamin interjected in an agitated voice.

He just denied everything as if he didn’t care about the previous content at all.

“That’s true. You both have such bizarre arguments……”

Hyunjae, it’s our culture of play. Please understand.

“Leave me out of it! I’m really trying to be like Dong-hwa!”

“Hyung, that’s what I was going to say.”

“Dong-hwa, you can’t do that, really!”

While everyone was not eating their rice and arguing about who was the most diligent and who we were trying to be like, Seok-joon patted his stomach and sat in his chair, laughing.

“I tried to be like both of you—”

“Pick one! Joon-ah!”

“Is there a need to ask?”

There are cases where there is a right answer without having to think about it.

Just as the proposition ‘I am me’ is obviously correct, Ryu Iden is several times more human to emulate than me.

“Because it’s you, of course!”

Seok-joon answered with a troubled expression.

“…I don’t know why you’re putting your lives on the line for this—but you’re both the same.”

“Joon, saying they’re the same requires a lot of logical evidence.”

“That……”

“Ha, anyone can see that Dong-hwa hyung is more diligent!”

Lee Hyunjae seemed fed up. He clenched his head for a moment and fell into a state of resignation with the expression, ‘This was our group…….’

“Luminous, these hyungs usually play like this.”

Then Lee Hyunjae muttered quietly.

I realized what kind of disgrace I had shown in front of the camera. Damn Ryu Iden.

I took a breath and got up from my seat and asked Ryu Iden.

“Tell me what you want to eat now.”

“Huh? I ate meat, so I’m craving a salad. Why?”

I’m not sure if that’s what he really wants to eat.

“I’ll make it for you.”

Balsamic sauce, I probably brought it.

* * *

As Ji Dong-hwa walked to the kitchen in the campsite, Ryu Iden also covered his face, feeling ashamed for the first time in a while.

“Ah, I was originally planning to tease only Dong-hwa.”

Since there were only observation cameras and no one else, he played around as he would in the dorm. Ji Dong-hwa escaped under the pretext of food, leaving him to bear all the shame alone.

But shame is shame, and Ryu Iden is the kind of person who has to say what he has to say.

“No matter how I look at it, Dong-hwa is my role model.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I don’t call him hyung for nothing.”

“Hyung, did the call go well?”

Ah, that’s right. I was having so much fun playing with Ji Dong-hwa.

“Yeah, he said he was going to send you guys a text too. The reason itself wasn’t a big deal?”

It seems like Mok-hwa is dreaming of a situation where everyone around Ji Dong-hwa is helping him. He’s out of his mind like his hyung.

“Really? I want to text Mok-hwa. What’s the reason? Dong-hwa was so anxious.”

“He said hyung is hiding secrets from him.”

Eek, a small scream escaped from Chae Hamin’s lips.

Seok-joon and Lee Hyunjae looked at Chae Hamin with puzzled eyes.

“Th, there’s a bug here.”

“Is it because we’re outside?”

Only Ryu Iden smiled, thinking that was probably it.

“A secret from Dong-hwa hyungnim [honorific for older brother/male friend]—”

Ryu Iden stretched and reached for the sign. He planned to take it out immediately if the story started to go in a strange direction.

“Maybe Dong-hwa hyung is a creature that doesn’t need sleep, or something like that.”

Lee Hyunjae stroked his chin, thinking hard.

“I can’t even imagine what it would be like if Dong-hwa hyung wasn’t in our group……. Just looking at the amount of work, he sometimes seems crazy. First of all, all of our activity songs would have been different, right? Our solo songs might have been released later too.”

“That’s right. Dong-hwa hyungnim always makes the songs I dream of.”

“That hyung really likes us. I was so worried about whether I could get this close when I first met Dong-hwa. When you get to know him, he likes us the most.”

Ryu Iden joked, listening to Lee Hyunjae and Seok-joon’s words.

“That’s right. He seems so cold. But when I think about it now, he was just bad at expressing himself and he really liked us a lot. When I was sick from studying, Dong-hwa hyung stayed up all night next to me.”

“That was me too!”

“It was me too!”

Immediate rebuttals from Ryu Iden and Chae Hamin. It’s the struggle of the hyungs who crave the maknae’s [youngest member’s] love.

“Sorry, Hyunjae. Only—I slept.”

“Hyung will die the next day if he doesn’t sleep, so there’s nothing you can do about it. And Dong-hwa hyung is the only one who really didn’t sleep at all, right? Don’t put your spoon on my precious memories.”

“Ha, our maknae really likes Dong-hwa so much, what should we do?”

A moment of silence. Ryu Iden stuck the sign into the ground.

Receiving everyone’s puzzled gaze, Ryu Iden smiled kindly.

“It’s just a story we’re telling because he’s not here, but there are times when I feel distant from Dong-hwa.”

Lee Hyunjae nodded.

Seok-joon had a look on his face that said he didn’t know at all, and Chae Hamin bit his lip a little.

Ryu Iden carefully observed the reaction. Our Hamin is good at acting, but he’s really immature at things like that.

“That’s right. Sometimes it feels like we’re watching from afar……. Sometimes it feels like a third-person observer.”

This time, Ryu Iden nodded vigorously.

“Let’s treat him better! Let’s make all that disappear! Think about how to treat him better. I’m trying to take care of things that Dong-hwa can’t pay attention to in my own way.”

“Then I’ll try to compose a little more properly. Isn’t it because hyungnim is too tired because he has too little time to rest?”

“I don’t know. Dong-hwa doesn’t tell us first. So, make him not know what to do with the warmth, like taking off a traveler’s clothes [a Korean idiom meaning to overwhelm someone with kindness]. Make him spill everything on his own.”

Under the night sky where dense stars were emitting light, a table where they were sharing their thoughts while chatting, and Ji Dong-hwa was sitting in a blind spot invisible from the table, listening to all the stories.

His eyes contained the starlight as it was, and a short sentence was floating in front of him.

[I told you. Whatever you choose, you will be happy.]