Born As The Daughter Of A Lowly Concubine [EN]: Chapter 155

“My child was… a girl.”

“Your Ladyship.”

“If she had lived, she would have been older than the current Crown Prince, so she would already be married and living outside the palace.”

It’s a futile thought, but I sometimes think about it. What if she had lived?

What kind of child would she have been?

But that child died as soon as she was born, even younger than the ailing Princess Su-yeong.

That’s why I always feel complicated when I see Princess Su-yeong.

“When I see Princess Su-yeong… I feel both affection and resentment.”

“How can you say such a thing?”

“You know it too, don’t you?”

When I first saw the young princess at the Queen Dowager’s residence, I thought that might be the case.

And when I first saw Consort Yun. I immediately realized why His Majesty had suddenly made a court lady a concubine.

That’s why most of the concubines kept their distance from Consort Yun.

“I didn’t want to get close… even though Consort Yun had nothing to do with the deceased Queen.”

“Your Ladyship.”

Those who don’t know still can’t even guess, but those who suspect know at least vaguely.

Who killed their child.

“The late Royal Concubine Hong and the current Queen both protected their children.”

“It’s not your fault, Your Ladyship.”

“I don’t know…”

Maybe they were just lucky.

At the time, when the King’s daughter born to the Queen died of smallpox and everyone was in despair, the fact that Royal Concubine Hong was pregnant was revealed.

I couldn’t dare to say anything because everyone was worried about the King’s daughter’s illness, or so she said.

His Majesty, who was deeply saddened by the successive deaths of the children, appointed Royal Concubine Hong as Noble Consort after the prince was born safely.

And another concubine who was also pregnant, the current Queen, who was lower in rank than Royal Concubine Hong at the time, also gave birth to a prince a few months later and was appointed Consort.

I realized then.

Both of them may have been able to protect the child in their womb safely because everyone’s attention was focused on the King’s daughter’s illness and death.

The child born after that was protected thoroughly and grew up.

In particular, Consort Seon raised the prince in her arms like a frightened person. It wasn’t just because he was sickly.

‘I should have done that too.’

My child died because I was naive and foolish.

When I see the princess, it comes to my mind involuntarily.

If my child had lived, she might have been loved like the princess.

If it hadn’t been for Consort Yun’s daughter, who was as good as murdered by Royal Concubine Hong, I might have resented Princess Su-yeong, who looked just like the deceased Queen, someday.

‘But the close aides of Queen Seonghyeon and Crown Prince Seongwon didn’t seem to like Princess Su-yeong, who looked just like Queen Seonghyeon, even though they were complete strangers.’

In contrast to Crown Prince Seongwon’s utmost affection for the princess, they hated her.

All that mattered to them was the dead Queen and her descendants.

I was foolish to think that they would remember and cherish the dead Queen; they hated the young princess so much.

Royal Noble Consort turned around to return to her residence.

And whispered in a small voice.

“I was actually relieved when Crown Prince Seonghyeon died in an accident and Consort Seon’s son became the Crown Prince, to be honest.”

“Your Ladyship…!”

“Yes. If someone hears these words, I might be dragged to the Uigeumbu [a Joseon Dynasty judicial office].”

At least Consort Seon had experienced the same threat and had never harmed anyone.

The current Crown Prince was not as scary as the dead Crown Prince.

“You. Do you have any intention of taking the military examination?”

“No.”

Immediately after Princess Su-yeong was dragged away by the Crown Prince, Cheon-ho was also surrounded by strange men and had to listen to this question.

‘At first, I thought I was being dragged away for interrogation.’

It was a bit of a wrong expression to say they were unfamiliar.

They were also the people I had faced during the Crown Prince and Princess’s tag game, and some of them were people I had seen when I was dragged away by Sir Seong Gyeom.

‘But it’s not like we know each other well, so is it right to say they’re unfamiliar?’

While Cheon-ho was having such useless thoughts, the officers of the Guard started arguing among themselves.

“Isn’t the military examination too difficult? With such outstanding talent, it would be better to have him as His Highness the Crown Prince’s guard.”

“I heard he’s still young, so of course we should recommend the military examination. Do you have no conscience?”

“What are you talking about when we’re the Guard?”

Cheon-ho wanted to get away from the men who were discussing his future as they pleased.

For reference, to Cheon-ho, who was still 15 years old, men in their mid-20s were roughly middle-aged men.

“No. I don’t want to change jobs. I’m going to serve Princess.”

“Ahem, you’re still young and don’t know much. As a man, you should make a name for yourself and please your parents.”

“They’re both dead.”

“Oh dear. It’s a pity that he’s still so young. But if you enter government service, they will definitely be pleased.”

“I’ll do it myself.”

Cheon-ho answered crookedly, but the man didn’t even pretend to hear the young boy’s words.

“We’re saying this for your own good, what’s with that attitude!”

“Ah.”

Cheon-ho frowned at the sudden familiar voice.

“Hmm? Aren’t you the new Gyeomsabok [a type of military officer] who came in recently?”

“I’m sorry, sir. This guy is my nephew, and he’s still young and immature.”

“Ah, if he’s the nephew of the Gyeomsabok, his uncle will take good care of him. We’ve been meddling unnecessarily.”

Because Princess Su-yeong took him around, he somehow naturally felt like an orphan from Siyeongwon [an office that took care of orphans].

In the first place, these days there was the Su-yeong Academy, so it wasn’t like there were only orphans around.

“No. You’re all saying this because you’re worried about him.”

“Haha. I’m grateful if you think so. Anyway, your nephew is very unusual.”

Since they couldn’t catch him, the evaluation of Cheon-ho naturally went up.

After all this, Cheon-ho, who had barely escaped from the men thanks to his uncle, was dragged away by his uncle this time and had to suffer nagging.

“How did you know, Uncle?”

“The rumor that you held Princess Su-yeong in your arms and played tag with His Highness the Crown Prince is widespread, you rascal.”

Anyway, there are no secrets in the palace.

“I didn’t really play tag, I just did what Princess told me to do.”

“You were Princess’s ride.”

You could say it was a proxy war of tag.

If it hadn’t been for Cheon-ho, Princess wouldn’t have been caught even after five steps.

The uncle, who had dragged Cheon-ho to a secluded place, checked that no one was around and scolded him in a small voice.

“What did you come to the palace for? Did you come to the palace just to be Princess’s ride?”

“……I got a job.”

“You rascal!”

Cheon-ho’s blunt words called for a fist, but Cheon-ho’s body, which had been trained for many years, instinctively avoided the fist.

“No, why are you hitting me?”

“……A guy who hasn’t been hit knows…… ahem. Listen carefully. You have to find your father’s enemy.”

“How?”

“By any means!”

It was a small voice, but the uncle’s voice was firm.

“To do that, you have to become a close aide to the Crown Prince, so why are you refusing this good opportunity?”

“As I said before, it was His Highness the Crown Prince who was reluctant because I was too young in the first place.”

Still fifteen. It was not strange that the Crown Prince was hesitant to keep him by his side.

Besides, if the fact that the son of a traitor was by the Crown Prince’s side was revealed before the enemy and the false accusation were revealed, he would simply be dead.

For the same reason, it was also difficult to take the civil service examination.

“Above all, I don’t know much about my father.”

“…….”

When I was young, I naturally believed that my father could not have done anything wrong, but as I grew up, I realized that I knew nothing about my father.

Because he went out as a military commander when I was very young, I didn’t remember much.

At the time, I was only 7 years old. It had been several years since I last met my father, so there was no way I could have proper memories.

In the first place, there was no way to confirm whether he had really been involved in treason.

The uncle, who was his sworn brother and owed his father his life, firmly believed that his father was innocent, but to be honest, I couldn’t help but wonder how much I should believe.

‘He had a new wife and even siblings I didn’t know about there.’

I haven’t lived that long, but after seeing men who were so engrossed in their new wives that they didn’t care about the children of their dead first wives, my trust in my father, whom I didn’t even know, was hitting rock bottom.

‘My sister has memories of my father, so I don’t know what she thinks.’

Rather, if my sister had been falsely accused, I would have tried to clear her name no matter what. That’s the kind of person my sister was.

“And I like being by Princess’s side more than His Highness the Crown Prince.”

Above all, it was more comfortable and enjoyable to be by Princess’s side.

It would be nice to say that I’m clinging to my first love who didn’t grow up the way I liked when I was young, but I’m not a pervert and I don’t have impure feelings for a child.

‘There’s also the part that makes me unable to take my eyes off her because she’s somehow precarious.’

As I’ve learned over the past few months, Princess’s close aides are generally experiencing similar symptoms.

Still, everyone liked Princess.

There was no reason not to enjoy helping Princess, who was always enthusiastic about something and devoted to helping people.

‘She’s also cute like a younger sister. And she gives me good food.’

Besides, the salary was good, even though the Crown Prince was the one paying.

The best job. I acknowledge it.

Well, the employer might change because of today’s events.

“Uncle, go back to work. I think I should go back too.”

“Cheon-ho, you rascal! Is that more important than your…… no, your father?”

The uncle, who was about to say a cliché line like ‘You’re obsessed with women!’, quickly changed his words because he knew Princess in the form of a young child.

“My uncle may value his sworn brothers, but I value my sister more, and Princess also… is precious to me.”

If my father was falsely accused, what if the one who falsely accused him was the King?

My uncle would try to take revenge on that King.

‘But can I point a knife at Princess’s father?’

I haven’t watched him for that long, but the King seemed to be a good father to Princess, at least.

And Princess was also a benefactor to me.

Could I harm the father of that girl, who is definitely older than me but still only looks like a child?

‘I wonder if she’ll be there when I return to my residence.’

Of course, I was also grateful to my uncle.

He took me in and raised me as his nephew because I was his father’s child, and everything I’ve learned to survive so far was also learned from my uncle.

‘In a way, my uncle seems more like someone I should call father.’

Is it because I haven’t properly learned Confucianism that I have these thoughts?

I was taken to a strange place and wandered around a bit, and when I arrived at Princess’s residence, I unexpectedly found the Crown Prince, Princess, and Physician Se-hwa together.

“Oh, why are you here now?”

“That’s how it happened.”

The court ladies, whose faces were now familiar, giggled and announced that Cheon-ho had arrived.

“Wow, welcome. Cheon-ho. Are you okay?”

“Hmm. I saw you being dragged away by the Guard and thought you wouldn’t be able to come back.”

“…….”

In contrast to Princess and the Crown Prince’s playful tone, Se-hwa smiled awkwardly and greeted him with her eyes.