Brother, Am I Cute? [EN]: Chapter 257

I arrived in Busan.

Siha had been sulking the entire way.

It was inevitable since Baek Donghwan’s lies had been completely exposed.

“Siha, I said I’m sorry.”

“Go away, Baek Dong hyung.”

Siha turned his head away.

Yet, he’s holding my hand tightly. It seems he can’t forgive Baek Donghwan.

But I don’t know why he looks so cute when he’s sulking.

No, how could he do that to me!

That’s the kind of feeling I got.

“Hyung, please do something.”

“You brought it on yourself.”

Bear the responsibility for what you started.

Still, Siha isn’t the type to stay sulky for long.

He’ll probably get over it soon.

“Hyung, if you lie, don’t you go to the police station?”

“You do. You get arrested for spreading false information.”

“Baek Dong hyung, be careful. Siha will go to the police *ajussi* [term of endearment for older men, like ‘uncle’].”

Baek Donghwan nodded.

But seeing the playfulness still on his face, I think he needs to be scolded a bit.

“Okay, I understand. But Siha, if the police and I fight, who would win?”

It was a very simple question.

But it came across as serious to Siha.

He looks up and down at Baek Donghwan’s body.

He’s built with thick bones, bulging muscles, and a huge frame.

Just then, a police car passes by.

Anyone would look small next to Baek Donghwan.

“Ah?”

Siha couldn’t say anything.

Well, isn’t it obvious to a child’s eyes who would win in a fight?

Baek Donghwan wins.

If he reports to the police and they fight, can they really catch Baek Donghwan?

Siha was worrying about something like that.

“Siha, the police have a gun, so they can catch him.”

“A gun?!”

“Yeah. It’s an electric gun, and if you get zapped, even Baek Dong hyung can’t move.”

Baek Donghwan looked at me as if I was being too much.

Why? What? Why are you looking at me like that?

It’s only natural to take Siha’s side.

“Baek Dong hyung, be careful. Got it!”

Siha’s spirit is high again.

A fox with a tiger on its back. No, Siha with the police on his back.

His shoulders are squared.

That look is so cute.

“Okay, I’ll be careful.”

This time, Baek Donghwan whimpers and backs down.

Well, it’s only for a moment, and he’ll be full of thoughts of playing pranks later.

It seems that the innocent Siha has already finished forgiving him with just that.

“Hyung, are we there yet?”

“Yeah. We’ve arrived. We just need to go over there.”

I arrived at the accommodation that had been booked.

It was a *pension* [Korean-style guesthouse] near the beach, and the rooms were full.

It seemed like everyone had booked to see the New Year.

“*Oppa* [term used by a younger woman to address an older brother or male friend], we booked this entire pension.”

“What? Ah, well. Considering the number of people, we’d have to book all the rooms.”

“That’s right. More people came than I thought. But not that many people will be sleeping. Everyone will probably crash after seeing the sunrise.”

“Are they all planning to stay up all night?”

“Some people will probably be drinking.”

“Hehehe.”

“I asked them to empty the small 2-3 person room, so Siha and Baek Donghwan can go in there together. *Oppa*, you’re going to sleep, right?”

“Well, considering the time. I’ll stay awake until 12.”

“Then that’s good. Anyway, thank you for your hard work today. See you at the New Year!”

“Okay. Thanks. Ah! I’ll stop by to show my face later.”

“Okay.”

Seo Suhyun disappeared right away.

I didn’t bring much luggage. I’m just going to see the New Year and then go back up after eating.

“Siha, are you going to listen to the New Year’s bell and then sleep?”

“Ah ah.”

Siha nodded with sparkling eyes.

It’s nothing special, but he wants to listen to it.

He takes out his pad from his penguin bag and climbs onto the bed to draw.

He’s as natural as if it’s his own home.

“What are you drawing?”

“Pepe.”

“It’s Pepe again.”

“Pepe New Year Mokpo.”

“You mean goal.”

Siha is setting Pepe’s New Year’s goal.

I wonder if he even needs a New Year’s goal.

“So, what’s Pepe’s goal?”

“YouTuber!”

It feels like a typical elementary school student’s dream.

“Ah, it’s starting.”

When I turned on the TV, a large crowd of people appeared.

In a little while, they’ll be counting down.

After one performance ended, a bell appeared on the screen.

“Siha, it’s starting.”

“Ah?”

“Oh oh oh. *Hyungnim* [respectful term for older brother or male friend]. They’re counting down.”

We watched TV and shouted the countdown.

“Five! Four! Three! Two! One!”

-Daeng! Daeng!

“Siha, Happy New Year!”

“You too, hyung!”

“*Hyungnim* and Siha, Happy New Year. But why don’t you say it to me!”

“Siha, aren’t you tired now? Let’s sleep.”

“Siha sleep.”

“Hello? Can’t you hear me?!”

Siha and I smiled slightly, looking at Baek Donghwan’s wronged expression.

***

4 AM.

I woke up. I slept a bit on the train, and I usually wake up around this time anyway.

I went to the bathroom and looked out the window.

Gijang, Busan.

It’s my first time coming, but the sky was clear today.

I felt like I should get ready and leave now.

I put on the hat I had prepared and went out for a moment.

I could hear a lot of noise. It seemed like the kids were drinking and making noise.

When I went into the room, it seemed like some people were already sleeping.

“Oh? *Oppa*?”

“Yeah. I was going to come, but I fell asleep.”

“Oh oh! Si-hyuk, come here. Here. Want a drink?”

A classmate called me over with a gesture.

As many as there are Cosmos returning students, there are one or two more classmates.

I shook my head.

“I’m going to go towards the sea in a bit.”

“Isn’t it too early?”

“The sky is pretty.”

“Huh?”

“I wanted to show it to Siha.”

Everyone blinked at my words.

Why that expression?

Seo Suhyun said.

“*Oppa*, you’re still the same even when the New Year comes.”

“What is?”

“You’re only thinking about Siha. Even when you see that pretty sky, you think Siha should see it. Even when you eat something delicious, you think Siha should eat it. Something like that.”

“It’s only been a day since the New Year, would something change?”

“It just feels like you’re going a different path than us. That’s the feeling I get. Even though we’re in the same space.”

I chuckled.

“What’s different? It’s the same. I’m just raising a kid earlier than you guys.”

I looked around.

If. If my parents hadn’t passed away, I might have been sitting here drinking and thinking, what should I do for the New Year? What about getting a job? Still, it’s fun to sit here, drink, and hang out.

I might have thought something like that.

Laughing, chatting, hanging out, sharing time.

You could say it’s time that young people just let pass by, but it’s a gift to myself for studying so hard.

That’s the feeling I get as I watch the New Year, and I pledge to become a better version of myself this year.

In fact, this is the last chance for these friends who are going into their fourth year to hang out like this.

It’s hard to see each other after getting a job and graduating.

“Everyone, have fun and let’s meet at Yongwangdan. We have to go see the sunrise. I’ll be there first. Happy New Year.”

“Okay. Happy New Year to you too, Si-hyuk.”

“You got a job first among our classmates!”

“That’s right! Even if it’s a freelancer, you’re the first to earn money!”

“Ah, that’s right!”

I chuckled and left the room.

“*Oppa*.”

Seo Suhyun followed me out.

She had a complicated expression.

“Did I recommend it for nothing?”

“Huh?”

“Just. Just… I was wondering if *oppa* felt alienated here. I was wondering if I hurt *oppa* for nothing.”

“You’re silly. Why do you think that way? Coming here is a huge win.”

I put my hands in my pockets and shrugged my shoulders.

“Rather, I’m grateful that you invited me here? I couldn’t hang out with the kids during the semester, but it was nice to see their faces and share some words of blessing.”

“Then that’s a relief, but.”

I chuckled, seeing her looking dejected.

Is it because she’s a singer and songwriter that she’s so sensitive?

She points out my feelings so casually.

“Everyone lives like this.”

“Huh?”

“Everyone lives like this. Busy, hectic, unable to take care of those around them. I’m busy because I live with a child, and you guys are busy studying and getting jobs.”

Isn’t that how it is?

“During these New Year’s or Lunar New Year’s, huh? Are you doing well? I’m doing well too. Let’s have a meal or a drink when we meet next time. We throw out those empty promises and then live busily in reality again.”

“That’s right.”

“Then we make plans, and if we get the chance, we meet. That’s how it is.”

The environment is just different.

How boring would it be if everyone was the same color?

“I’ve been talking for too long, but I’m okay. It was good.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re Siha. What are you thanking me for? I’m the one who’s grateful.”

“Puh-huh. That’s true.”

“Then I’ll go. It’s been a long time.”

“Yes. Go ahead.”

I turned around and was about to go back to the room.

“*Oppa*!”

“Why?”

“Next time, have fun with the kids. Drink too.”

“…Okay.”

“Really. I’ll definitely call you. You have to come.”

“…Okay. Thanks.”

Bang.

I opened the door.

Even when the New Year comes, my life doesn’t change.

But that doesn’t mean I’m not happy. Having Siha makes every day enjoyable, rewarding, and a motivation to work.

Even when it’s hard, I can get up.

But very occasionally… No, never mind.

I shook my head.

“Siha, do you want to go see the night sky? I think the stars will be very pretty tonight.”

“Ah?”

Siha slowly opened his eyes and then closed them again.

Then he raised his arms to be held.

I gently held him.

He turned 4 years old, but because he was born in December, he still feels small.

It still feels like he’s 3 years old.

I said earlier that it’s only been a day, but I don’t know what he’s thinking.

Bang.

“Oh! You surprised me.”

“I was surprised too.”

Baek Donghwan, who came out of the bathroom, was seen.

He had a towel in his hand, as if he had washed his face.

“Are you leaving?”

“Yeah. The New Year’s sky is so pretty today. Is it because it’s Gijang?”

“Haha. Maybe. Let’s go. I was thinking of exercising.”

“You really…”

“Why are you doing that?”

“No. I like it. I sometimes respect your planned day. I mean, your habit of trying to exercise every morning.”

“I have to take care of myself. A voice actor has to take care of his body, not just his voice. If my body isn’t good, it shows right away in my voice.”

“Okay.”

It seems that Baek Donghwan’s life is no different even though it’s the New Year.

It’s the same for me, but I have a New Year’s goal.

I just need to run towards it.

“Aren’t you meeting your friends?”

“Well, I can see them sometimes.”

His indifferent reaction is strangely pleasing.

“Let’s go.”

“Yes!”

I look at the dark room through the crack in the door. The light shining on the remaining bag is disappearing.

Click.

I closed the door.

Sometimes, there are things that you leave behind to take later.

***

I arrived at Orandae Park.

I walked past the grass and down to the rocks. I could see the bizarre cliffs and Yongwangdan was firmly in place.

The sky was spreading a pitch-black blanket, and the starlight shining inside created a quaint atmosphere.

Below, tripods that had firmly taken their place, listening to the sound of the waves of the sea, were supporting the scenery of the stars.

Photographers took their places and looked at the sky.

“Hyung. Star!”

“Yeah. Can you see the stars in the sky over there?”

“Ah ah. Pretty!”

“They’re stars in space.”

“Why?”

“Maybe it’s because they live in space?”

“Space eyes. Eyes. Sparkling.”

“Oh.”

If there are so many space eyes, it seems a little scary…

“Space eyes black.”

Siha pointed to his eyes.

It seems that space is a black pupil.

“Sparkling inside.”

Is he saying that the sparkle of the pupils that absorb light are the stars?

Or is it another meaning?

I sometimes want to go inside Siha’s head.

It seems very interesting and fun.

“It’s so dark right now, but it’ll brighten up soon. It won’t be long.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. In the blink of an eye, huh? The sky?”

Siha was also excited and wiggled his feet.

At that time, Baek Donghwan came running, panting.

“*Hyungnim*. I bought something warm. This park is well-maintained. It’s good for running.”

“Do you run even here?”

“Today is a day off, but I have to do it a little.”

We each held a warm bottle and quietly looked at the sky.

The weather was chilly because it was dawn, but strangely, I didn’t feel too cold.

Just moderately cold?

Siha is wrapped in the scarf that Baek Donghwan gave him.

“Oh? The sky is changing.”

“Ah? Red!”

It’s turning red.

The appearance of the sun is slowly revealed as blue and red mix.

Siha is staring blankly at the scenery.

Looking around, there were already many people.

My classmates were already there.

‘Nice.’

I think the people watching the sunrise are more spectacular.

“Hyung.”

“Yeah?”

“Everyone’s eyes are sparkling.”

Siha pointed to the people.

It seems we both had the same thought.

The sun walks through the dark sky, but it also erases the shadows on people’s faces.

Maybe that’s why we watch the New Year.

“Are Siha’s sparkling too? Is it the red he likes?”

“No. Siha pink.”

“Huh?”

“Hyung. Blue.”

Siha looks at my eyes with clear eyes.

I don’t know what he’s talking about, but he’s seeing a different color than me.

Let’s understand it that way.