In This Life, I Will Die As An Actress, Not As A Villainess [EN]: Chapter 129

“Great pose! Hold it right there!”

“Wow, fantastic!”

A few days later, I found myself at the photoshoot, my body present but my soul absent.

Holding a perfume bottle, I lay on the mattress, striking a seductive pose and gaze.

Even as I loathed myself for my improving posing skills, I stared only at the camera lens.

How long had we been shooting?

“Let’s take a break!”

At the staff’s words, I briefly stepped away from the camera to catch my breath.

I felt like I was going crazy.

I’m supposed to disappear soon.

What’s the point of doing anything?

Every moment, every breath, I was constantly reminded that I wasn’t the main personality.

So, just live moderately.

I couldn’t reject that conclusion.

‘Do I really have to let go of Yoo Da-yang?’

Kang Ji-oh’s voice kept echoing in my mind.

During breaks, I would just stare blankly at the black screen of my phone.

I didn’t have the courage to contact Kang Ji-oh.

It felt like I would have to say goodbye at our next meeting.

I wasn’t ready yet.

Once again, I jumped up at the staff’s call of “Stand by!”

It seemed the answer was to immerse myself in work without thinking.

I kept wanting to see Kang Ji-oh.

What could Kang Ji-oh be doing right now?

* * *

Eventually, a few days later, I found myself at Kang Ji-oh’s house, which had become somewhat familiar.

“You still manage to turn my insides out, one way or another.”

Kang Ji-oh sat on the sofa, smiling as he stroked my hair.

I didn’t say anything, just resting my head on Kang Ji-oh’s lap, enjoying his touch.

“Can you tell right away now whether I’m Yoo Da-yang or Yoo Ha-young?”

I asked, almost mockingly.

Yet, Kang Ji-oh just smiled faintly, as if it didn’t matter.

“Yeah. You’d have to be an idiot not to tell.”

“If I disappear, will you be sad?”

I tossed the question out as casually as asking about the weather, and Kang Ji-oh’s hand stopped.

“……”

Kang Ji-oh finally spoke.

“Are you really asking because you’re curious?”

“Yeah.”

Kang Ji-oh sighed.

“I don’t want to lose you. I haven’t even thought about what happens after losing you.”

“……”

“I’m scared.”

“Seriously. Since when did you like me this much?”

The words kept coming out wrong, different from what I felt inside.

Kang Ji-oh chuckled again before getting to the point.

“You don’t know Yoo Ha-young very well, do you?”

I nodded silently to the question.

Kang Ji-oh continued.

“Yoo Ha-young knows how you’re living, but it seems like she doesn’t know your personality or detailed past.”

“Yeah.”

“Can’t the two of you accept each other?”

“Accept each other?”

“How about Yoo Ha-young learns how to live as Yoo Da-yang, and Yoo Da-yang learns Yoo Ha-young’s memories?”

My mind started racing at Kang Ji-oh’s suggestion.

Is that even possible?

Even if it is, would Yoo Ha-young want that?

Could this be the real ending of the script?

I sat up and looked at Kang Ji-oh.

Kang Ji-oh looked back at me with a serious expression.

* * *

That night.

I had a dream of meeting another me.

In a small garden filled with warm sunlight.

A me with a somewhat cold and lonely face was staring straight at me.

The moment I saw those eyes, I knew it was Yoo Ha-young.

In this bizarre situation, I was confused about whether I was Yoo Da-yang or Han Sae-na.

While trying to hold onto my hazy mind, Yoo Ha-young came closer to me.

And said.

“Disappear. Just stop now.”

I stared straight at Yoo Ha-young as she said that.

There was something I wanted to say to Yoo Ha-young.

“You need me. And I need you too.”

“Don’t be mistaken. I only needed you briefly in the past, so I created you. I don’t need you anymore.”

I carefully observed Yoo Ha-young, who still seemed like a wounded child.

What could have hurt her so much?

“I’m not trying to take your place. I want to protect my life too.”

“……”

“No one will hurt you anymore.”

Yoo Ha-young bit her lip as if she was overwhelmed by my words.

“Being poor, getting beaten for no reason, not being cared for by anyone. Being in the shadows. No one even glancing at me. You don’t know about any of that, do you?”

“…Break free from the past. Live your life now.”

“What do you know.”

“That’s right. I don’t know well. So tell me, about you.”

Yoo Ha-young looked at me with a confused expression.

I smiled slightly at Yoo Ha-young.

“I’m not usually this nice either.”

“…Tch.”

I held out my hand to Yoo Ha-young.

Yoo Ha-young hesitated, looking down at my hand.

If she took this hand, many things would change.

I waited silently for Yoo Ha-young to take my hand.

Yoo Ha-young took a step, then another, forward.

“Can we do it?”

“I don’t know either. Let’s just try.”

With a face still filled with fear, Yoo Ha-young slowly reached out her hand.

It was the first time I felt the sensation of holding Yoo Ha-young’s hand.

I gripped Yoo Ha-young’s hand tightly, but not painfully.

“Take care of me.”

“I… take care of me too.”

At that moment, a dazzling light began to emanate from the hand I was holding with Yoo Ha-young.

Startled, I made eye contact with Yoo Ha-young.

“Not yet.”

I felt a sense of urgency.

* * *

“No!”

Late at night, I woke up abruptly from where I had been sleeping.

Kang Ji-oh, startled by my scream, woke up next to me.

“What’s wrong? What happened?”

Kang Ji-oh, equally surprised, looked at me.

Golden letters appeared in front of Kang Ji-oh’s face.

‘(5/5)’

So soon.

I wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet.

The golden letters faded, and I saw Kang Ji-oh’s face again.

“Kang Ji-oh.”

I called Kang Ji-oh’s name one last time.

“Why? Did you have a nightmare?”

I smiled and shook my head.

“No. I had a really good dream.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Thank you.”

“……”

Kang Ji-oh sensed the unusual atmosphere and frowned.

Thanks to the strange things that had happened, Kang Ji-oh, like me, couldn’t let his guard down for even a moment.

“You’re leaving? You’re not, right?”

Kang Ji-oh asked urgently.

I quickly hugged Kang Ji-oh.

“I’m not leaving. I’m just saying thank you.”

Kang Ji-oh hugged me tightly.

I closed my eyes, inhaling Kang Ji-oh’s familiar soap scent.

Slowly, the sensation of my arms embracing Kang Ji-oh began to fade.

It was time to leave.

‘Take care. Kang Ji-oh.’

In an instant, the world went dark.

In the pitch-black silence, I suddenly heard an unfamiliar voice.

‘Goodbye, stranger. Make the people of your world love us.’

‘If you act worse than me, you’re dead. Bye.’

This voice is….

Then, I felt the floor collapsing, and in the distance, I saw a small light flickering.

The light grew closer and closer.

The hazy feeling gradually disappeared, and I felt my feet touching the ground.

A sensation like crossing from zero gravity to Earth.

Then, I smelled that familiar soap scent again.

“…?”

I slowly opened my eyes.

“Sae-na, Sae-na!”

As my vision cleared, I saw Lee Seon-ho’s face, almost embracing me as he supported me.

For a long time, I couldn’t grasp the situation and stared intently at his face.

“Sae-na, are you okay??”

Lee Seon-ho shook me urgently.

I staggered at his touch and suddenly came to my senses.

“Kang Ji… no, Seon-ho?”

At that, Lee Seon-ho let out a sigh of relief.

“You suddenly lost consciousness, so I was really surprised.”

Only then did I notice the elevator wall behind Lee Seon-ho.

That’s right, I was trapped here.

Then, with a creaking sound, the elevator doors slowly opened.

“Are you two okay!? Oh, uh. Sorry to interrupt….”

A person who seemed to be Lee Seon-ho’s manager shouted urgently before trailing off.

Then, seeing the two of us so close together, he looked utterly flustered.

Seeing his face, we both panicked and scrambled apart.

“N, no! It’s not like that!”

“Faint, faint!!”

My manager, who had belatedly arrived, also looked at us with a gaze that seemed to ask for an explanation of what was going on.

Ugh, this is driving me crazy.

Lee Seon-ho, with a deeply flushed face, got out of the elevator first.

I quickly followed behind him.

* * *

First day of filming.

I stood facing Lee Seon-ho in front of the camera.

“Why do you keep following me around?”

“What?”

“Ah, you want an autograph. You should have said so. Ugh! Where should I sign?”

“…You don’t know me? You called me a dog instead of Kang Ji-oh. A son of a bitch.”

“…? Did I?”

“Are you making fun of me right now?”

Lee Seon-ho frowned and took a step, then another, closer.

Startled, I stumbled backward to match his steps.

“What is this person? I heard he’s a *chaebol* [a wealthy, family-controlled conglomerate]. Is he a stalker?”

“You’re the stalker.”

The moment Lee Seon-ho brought his face close, I was so surprised that I twisted my ankle.

In accordance with the rom-com cliché, my posture faltered for a moment, and I started to fall…

Lee Seon-ho supported my waist with his strong arm.

And then.

I closed and opened my eyes in a very brief moment, changing my gaze.

And slightly raising the corner of my lips, I wrapped my arms around Lee Seon-ho’s neck.

“…?!”

Lee Seon-ho panicked and tried to pull his body back, but I didn’t let go and went with him.

“W, what are you doing, now.”

I brought my lips close to Lee Seon-ho’s ear, who was flustered.

And whispered softly.

“Why? Isn’t this what you wanted?”

I lowered one arm and slipped my hand inside Lee Seon-ho’s suit jacket.

And slipped out his wallet, dropping it into my handbag.

All the while, Lee Seon-ho was oblivious, his ears turning bright red.

Then, he roughly pulled my hand away.

Pushed back by that force, I closed and opened my eyes again.

Again, I changed my gaze.

Instantly returning to Yoo Da-yang, I looked around in bewilderment.

I stared blankly at Kang Ji-oh’s angry face.

“What have you been doing since last time!”

Kang Ji-oh said in a loud voice.

Looking at Kang Ji-oh, I replied in an aggrieved tone.

“What did I even do….”

“Ha.”

Kang Ji-oh let out a scoff as if he was dumbfounded.

“What are you? Do you have multiple personalities?”

Startled, I looked at Kang Ji-oh.

A strong eye contact continued with Kang Ji-oh.

“Cut! Okay!!”

I heard the director’s okay sign from the speaker.

Relaxing my body, I made eye contact with Lee Seon-ho and smiled.

“The first day of filming feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Seon-ho, how do you act so that your ears turn red?”

“Huh? Ah, well, just….”

Seon-ho stammered at my complimenting question and smiled slightly.

“Let’s go for another take from the side!”

The assistant director’s voice was heard from afar.

* * *

Director Shin Cheol-won’s mouth dropped open as he watched the monitor.

“W, what did I just see.”

Han Sae-na’s ability to switch between Baek Jang-mi and Yoo Da-yang, two personalities, as if possessed, was nothing short of astonishing.

Even until today, when he set foot on the set, Shin Cheol-won had no confidence in the script.

It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that he participated solely based on the name value of Han Sae-na and Lee Seon-ho; the script was that difficult and incomprehensible.

If the work didn’t go well, he even secretly created an excuse to blame the rookie writer.

Even if he was pointed at and called a coward, it didn’t matter in this industry.

Staying power was far more important than being righteous.

But now, something completely unexpected had happened.

“So that’s why they say Han Sae-na, Han Sae-na.”

Shin Cheol-won muttered quietly.

And after monitoring once more, he fell into thought.

‘That personality that changes in the middle, it’s definitely a sly fox concept, but strangely charming, isn’t it?’

He had thought that it was teetering on the edge of being unlikeable when he only looked at the script.

But when Han Sae-na acted, the raw charm that emanated from the script was nicely processed and captivating people.

Something beyond a character created to be consumed by the flow of the play was born.

Something that seemed alive.