In This Life, I Will Die As An Actress, Not As A Villainess [EN]: Chapter 14

Under a clear, cloudless sky, I arrived at the UBN broadcasting station headquarters.

A large banner displaying the “Flat Shoes” poster was affixed to the building’s exterior wall.

As my taxi navigated through the heart of Seoul, I gazed at the broadcasting station headquarters.

Overwhelmed with emotion, I still struggled to believe this was real, often waking in the night to pinch myself.

My fellow actors, witnessing this, were invariably shocked and concerned.

A contented sigh escaped my lips.

“Flat Shoes” had been a significant hit in my previous life, but I don’t recall it reaching this level of frenzy….

The taxi’s radio crackled to life.

‘In short, South Korea is currently swept up in a “Flat Shoes” mania! Writer Lee Si-young, you must be incredibly proud.’

Oh.

My ears perked up, recognizing the voice. It was an interview with writer Lee Si-young.

‘Mania might be too strong a word. I’m simply grateful to the director, staff, and actors who brought the work to life. At my age, I’m often treated like a relic in this industry, but they’ve been incredibly supportive.’

‘A relic? Surely you’re being too modest! By the way, Han Se-na, the actress portraying Yoo Ji-an, the central figure in this “Flat Shoes” phenomenon, is captivating audiences with her fresh image and compelling performance. What are your thoughts?’

‘Above all, I’m thankful for her. She’s a truly remarkable person.’

My heart swelled with emotion.

Listening to writer Lee Si-young’s interview while watching the city pass by, I felt a strange sense of wonder.

Tears pricked at my eyes as the writer continued.

‘I’m about to reveal something for the first time: the character of Yoo Ji-an faced numerous hurdles in development. She was initially conceived as a ruthless villain, devoid of empathy. It was a challenging character to make relatable. I revised the script extensively. But then Se-na arrived.’

‘Oh my, a behind-the-scenes revelation!’

‘Indeed. This young actress imbued Yoo Ji-an with a believability that many felt was lacking. Ultimately, we reverted to the original script. Se-na is a true benefactor.’

‘Wow, this is headline news!’

‘A smart and talented young actress poured her heart into the role. Thanks to her, another one of my dramas has reached its full potential.’

The taxi driver glanced at me as I discreetly dabbed at my eyes.

Who am I to be taking on such a pivotal role…?

It was difficult to remain composed.

Then, the driver spoke in a gruff voice.

‘You watch “Flat Shoes,” too, miss? Everyone’s obsessed with it.’

‘Yes? Ah… I’m somewhat familiar with it. Do you watch it, driver?’

I gathered myself and responded, testing the waters.

The only place I’d witnessed the reaction to “Flat Shoes” firsthand was at home.

‘Our Se-na is the best!’

‘Se-na’s acting is incredible.’

…My parents’ words, hardly unbiased.

‘Yeah. I initially thought it was just another trashy drama, but my wife got me hooked, and now I watch it live.’

The driver chuckled heartily.

‘That Yoo Ji-an’s acting is something else. The sheer venom…’

The driver glanced at me in the rearview mirror and continued.

‘You resemble her, miss. Yoo Ji-an!’

‘Ahahaha…’

I awkwardly lowered my hat, forcing a smile.

Without an agency or manager, I relied on my parents’ car or taxis to get to the filming location.

I really should have gotten my license sooner.

Still, it was amusing to hear the drivers’ opinions on the drama.

And lately, the number of drivers recognizing me had been steadily increasing.

‘I hear that quite often.’

‘I’m dying to know what happens next…. What do you think will happen, miss?’

The driver continued to probe, a suspicious glint in his eye.

Our eyes met repeatedly in the rearview mirror, a silent battle of wits unfolding.

I struggled to suppress a laugh.

‘Yoo Ji-an’s character is a real emotional minefield. It was heartbreaking to write, and even watching it on TV can be difficult at times,’

As the radio broadcast concluded with the writer’s voice, the taxi pulled up in front of the filming location.

As I handed the driver the fare, he rummaged around and produced a piece of paper and a pen.

‘Um, excuse me. You’re Han Se-na, right? Could I get your autograph?’

I accepted the paper from the driver.

Finally, we both burst out laughing.

As I signed, the driver added one more thing.

‘I’m on Yoo Ji-an’s side! She’s honest, even if she’s harsh.’

‘Thank you. I’ll keep working hard.’

As I exited the taxi, I overheard the driver’s phone conversation.

‘Hey! Honey! I just saw Yoo Ji-an! That girl from “Flat Shoes”! I even got her autograph.’

* * *

Stepping onto the set, I sensed a heightened level of activity.

What’s going on? Another mishap?

A wave of anxiety washed over me.

As I approached the waiting room, the source of the commotion, I saw several staff members carrying a two-tiered cake.

What’s with the cake?

One of the staff members carefully unfurled a small placard behind the cake.

Ah, that explains it.

I smiled.

It was a good day in many respects.

I had checked the viewership ratings just this morning before leaving home.

And now, my phone was flooded with unread messages from various sources.

I was inundated with requests for magazine interviews after being voted the number one villain of the year by viewers, a beloved supporting actress, and so on.

I’d been feeling it more and more lately, but it was now abundantly clear that I needed an agency.

I felt like a rookie all over again….

My heart was touched once more.

‘Director Moon is coming!’

At the announcement, the staff erupted in applause.

Director Moon approached, a broad smile spreading across his face as he saw the cake.

‘Wow, you guys organized all this? Hey, should we have a company dinner tonight?’

Cheers and applause echoed at Director Moon’s suggestion.

‘Wow! Let’s have beef! Treat us to beef!’

‘Awesome!’

Then, one of the staff members gently pushed me forward, positioning me next to the director.

The director promptly handed me the cake.

‘Here, Se-na, you hold this.’

‘Director! What am I supposed to do with this?’

I was so embarrassed I felt like I was going to sweat.

‘Why not? Se-na is the primary reason for “Flat Shoes'” success.’

The staff cheered and applauded.

‘Our Se-na is a lucky charm!’

Senior actor Park Hoon and several other veteran actors joined in.

This was the first time I’d experienced this level of recognition.

The atmosphere was so focused on my contribution that I instinctively took a step back.

Then, my eyes met Yuri’s.

Yuri was smiling and applauding along with the staff.

When she caught my gaze, Yuri beamed at me.

My heart sank.

In reality, the internet was awash with provocative articles fueled by reporters seeking to boost readership….

[A Supporting Actor with More Presence than the Lead]

[Shocking! Yoo Ji-an Overshadows Shin Se-ra!]

[Yoo Ji-an’s “Flat Shoes”: What’s Next?]

After that, I became increasingly self-conscious during filming, and Yuri would offer slightly strained smiles and congratulations.

In those moments, I was at a loss for words.

‘I only know how to do one thing, and I wanted to do it well, so I’ve been working non-stop, making sure to do one project a year.’

‘Se-na, who’s acting for the first time, is outperforming me, who’s been acting for over 10 years. I was surprised. I was envious.’

My initial conversations with Yuri resurfaced in my mind, causing me pain.

I understood that ambition and those dreams better than anyone….

Yuri’s current, considerate smile was heartbreaking.

I handed the cake back to the director as if rejecting it and spoke.

‘The director should give a congratulatory speech first.’

‘Oh, is that so?’

The director cleared his throat, pretending to gather his thoughts.

‘Um… our staff always works tirelessly, and our actors… I’m deeply grateful.’

Director Moon clapped Kim Jung-hoon on the shoulder with enthusiasm, and Kim Jung-hoon responded with an awkward smile.

‘I’ll do even better!’

Kim Jung-hoon replied with a burst of energy.

The onlookers chuckled.

Seizing the opportunity, I quickly gestured for Yuri to come over.

Yuri pointed to herself, mouthing, ‘Me?’

I nodded.

The director handed the cake back to me.

‘Se-na, say a few words too. Record everything. The fans will love it if you upload it.’

I took the cake and passed it to Yuri, who had approached.

One of the staff members positioned himself in front of us with a camera.

I cleared my throat.

‘I’m saying this for the first time today, but without Yuri, I wouldn’t have been able to perform like this.’

Yuri looked at me, surprised.

‘Actually, every time Yuri and I work together, I feel like Yuri is incredibly considerate of me. And Yuri is such a talented actress. She’s so receptive in the scenes where I’m angry, creating a powerful synergy.’

Yuri stared at the side of my face.

When I was younger…

I reveled in the spotlight.

Attention was something you craved more and more as you received it.

If it seemed to be waning even slightly, I felt anxious, as if my position was threatened.

But now, I found greater satisfaction in building camaraderie with my fellow actors than in hogging the spotlight, and I felt more at ease.

That was far more important.

I wish I had realized this sooner, but it was impossible to grasp in my youth, fueled by passion and recklessness.

If I hadn’t filmed “Flat Shoes” again, I might never have understood this until my dying day.

Tears welled up in Yuri’s eyes.

I looked at Yuri.

‘I mean it. Thank you, Yuri.’

Yuri nodded, meeting my gaze.

Only then did Yuri’s smile appear genuine.

‘I’m grateful that you said that, Se-na.’

‘Okay, our leading ladies, let’s blow out the candles together.’

‘Okay, we’re filming. Blow out the candles when I say one, two, three. One, two, three!’

‘Okay, “Flat Shoes”!’

Whoosh-.

Yuri and I blew out the candles simultaneously.

‘Fighting!!’

The filming set reverberated with the cast and crew’s rallying cry.

Click!

A camera flash illuminated the scene.

After the picture was taken, I suddenly felt tears welling up in my eyes.

‘Oh, I’m being such a drama queen.’

It wasn’t even the wrap party yet.

Yuri smiled at me, offering a handkerchief.

As I dabbed my eyes, I noticed that Yuri’s eyes were also moist.

Our eyes met, and we burst out laughing at the same time.

‘Yuri, why are you crying?’

‘I’m just crying. Why are you crying, Se-na?’

‘Me too, just because.’

I realized it now.

That Yoo Ji-an was a gift in my life.

That she wasn’t the catalyst that twisted my life, but a benefactor who had given me wings.

‘You’re both being such drama queens! We’re only halfway through the drama!’

Ji-eun shouted from a short distance away.

The staff laughed at her words.

Ji-eun, while saying that, also had tears in her eyes.

Ji-eun tugged on Jung Chae-sung’s coat next to her and wiped away her tears.

‘Oh, no, Ji-eun. Why here…’

‘Be quiet.’

* * *

Some time later.

Not long after those happy days, the event I had anticipated arrived sooner than expected.

I was reviewing the script in front of the set when Yuri approached and placed her hand on my shoulder.

‘Se-na, are you okay?’

‘Yes?’

At Yuri’s words, all the staff at the filming location looked at us in silence.

Buzz-

Then, my phone vibrated.

I took out my phone in a daze and checked it, finding a text message from Seon Yu-seok.

‘Nuna [older sister/term of endearment], are you okay? Call me when you have time.’

I closed the text message and looked at my phone, revealing more than twenty missed calls.

Mom, Dad, Writer, Professor, Seon Yu-seok, several unknown numbers….

Looking around the filming location, everyone who was looking at me wore a worried expression.

‘Se-na… did you see the article?’