Sincerely, Vanessa [EN]: Chapter 47

“…Are you crying?”

“Vanessa! What’s wrong?”

Chebati kicked off her slippers and crawled onto the bed.

Vanessa, feeling like she was losing her mind, couldn’t lift her head and remained face down on the bed.

*Damn it*, she suddenly remembered criticizing Dylan Dyke, the eldest of the Dyke brothers, in that novel she read.

In that book, the eldest Dyke abandoned his parents and chased after Anna like a lovesick fool. And now, here was Vanessa Rose, lying face down on the bed, crying her eyes out.

And she was crying over something so trivial! Just seeing the shimmering water while washing had reminded her of being with him in the cave’s lake.

Vanessa mumbled, her voice muffled by the bedsheets, sobs punctuating her words.

“I’m… ruined.”

“No, what on earth do you mean, ‘ruined’? I’ve been holding back my questions for ages. What’s been going on with you lately?”

Lina, frustrated, thumped her chest. The delicate lace on her pajamas fluttered.

“I….”

“Ugh! Just tell me already! Crying in my house is a disgrace. If I tell my mom, you’ll be subjected to three hours a day of lectures about Aurelia’s beautiful sights and our family’s wonderful traditions starting tomorrow.”

As Lina rattled on, Vanessa finally lifted her tear-streaked face.

Chebati, seeing her flushed cheeks and tearful blue eyes, furrowed her brow with concern.

“Vanessa, did something happen?”

“I… I said the eldest’s head was a flower garden.”

“What?”

Lina tilted her head, confused by the sudden remark. The eldest? Ah, that literature assignment.

“Actually, *my* head is a flower garden. I’m really going crazy.”

As Vanessa muttered gloomily, Lina and Chebati exchanged glances. Then, they immediately pounced and started shaking Vanessa.

The large bed remained intact even as the three of them climbed on and jostled her.

“Who is it!”

“Who is it?”

Vanessa silently rubbed her wet eyes.

Lina and Chebati, breathless with curiosity, racked their brains. Lina spoke decisively.

“It doesn’t seem like Evan.”

“Of course not, why would she cry over Evan? She’s been like this since returning from the Special Forces training, so it must be one of the Special Forces members.”

Chebati analyzed coolly. Lina tore at her hair.

“Then we don’t know anyone!”

“No. There was one very famous Special Forces member Vanessa met. The one who disappeared with Vanessa.”

Lina rolled her eyes upward for a moment, then gaped.

“Could it be *him*?”

Vanessa pretended not to notice and stared at the ceiling. Even the wallpaper on the ceiling of this mansion sparkles, and they use such extravagant chandeliers even in the guest rooms….

Lina, seeing Vanessa avoiding her gaze, forced her lips open.

“Th-that’s quite… How should I put it?”

“Lina was always worried Vanessa would meet someone strange. Looks like we don’t have to worry about that anymore,” Chebati said, scratching her head. Vanessa pulled her knees to her chest, looking utterly dejected. Seeing her so downcast, Lina hesitated dozens of times before speaking.

“Um, how do you even know that person has feelings for you? Right? We’ve never even seen him, so…”

Even Lina, whom Chebati jokingly accused of having ‘Vanessa is the best’ disease, said that, making Vanessa even less confident.

The reason Lina and Chebati were so surprised was clear: He was too perfect.

“I know it won’t work out.”

“That attitude isn’t right.”

Lina immediately retorted, but Vanessa said weakly.

“I’m not putting myself down, it’s just the truth. He’s the only Duke in Friba [a high-ranking noble title], how could he be with someone like me?”

Vanessa released her arms from around her legs and flopped backward. The blanket with its intricate embroidery was incredibly soft. She didn’t care that her swollen eyes felt hot and wiped away the remaining moisture.

Then, the image of Gideon wiping her eyes with his handkerchief flashed through her mind, and she squeezed her eyes shut.

“Don’t worry, I’ve already given up, so I’ll be fine soon. I’m not that hopeful of a person. I won’t contact him anymore….”

Vanessa smiled slightly, seeing that both Lina and Chebati were clearly struggling with what to say.

“It’s okay. Don’t say anything. I don’t want comfort or encouragement. Just know that this is why I might seem strange.”

Lina just moved her lips, then lay down next to Vanessa.

“Okay. Let’s sleep early today and ride horses near the river tomorrow. How about it?”

“That sounds nice. The Lilnau River flows near here, right?”

Vanessa laughed at the quickly changed topic.

*Yes, if I spend time chatting with my friends like this, the feelings will soon be forgotten.*

Vanessa and Chebati spent a week realizing the extent of the Delina family’s influence in the Aurelia region.

When they passed through the market with Lina, the market vendors would smile and offer them juice. Of course, Lina paid for every single one.

The three of them borrowed white and black ponies and strolled along the river.

The famous Lilnau River reflected the sunlight and sparkled blue, sometimes creating a spectacle by reflecting the clouds on its surface.

Anyway, Vanessa didn’t cry just because there was a lot of water anymore.

“That’s a huge improvement.”

“Yeah, it would be a big problem if you suddenly kept crying because there was a lot of water,” Lina said, patting her back silently.

After spending an effortful, happy week, Vanessa left Lina and Chebati behind before the end of the vacation and headed to Nimrod first.

Nimrod, as soon as she got off at the train station, was the same as ever.

The bustling noise and the sound of poorly oiled machinery echoed around her. The houses, towering as if they were about to collapse, tilted precariously.

Vanessa followed the familiar path to Jenien’s house at 319 Nimrod.

Then, she stopped abruptly when she saw , which was on the way. It was the bakery where she first met Gideon.

That memory was still vivid. She had been momentarily speechless when their eyes met.

‘Which cake is delicious?’

A low voice. Suddenly, her eyes welled up again.

The cake display visible through the glass door and the burly owner were the same, but only she was different.

There was nothing as pointless as harboring an impossible love. Really.

Her very heart might have been impure for coming here. Wasn’t she coming with the secret hope of meeting Gideon, without even considering Jenien?

Because she didn’t have the courage to contact him herself, she hoped to run into him by chance.

She was ashamed of herself for that cowardly hope. She said she had given up, but in fact, she still held a small, flickering ember of expectation: that he would somehow notice her feelings.

Vanessa sniffled and headed to Jenien’s house. People were surprised and quickly moved aside, seeing a woman walking and shedding tears.

Vanessa wiped her wet cheeks, seeing only the stakes marking the boundary of 319. And she tried to detect the magic hidden in the yard.

Of course, Jenien was a great wizard, so Vanessa detected almost nothing. She barely grasped the kind of magic that concealed something.

Vanessa became even sadder, recalling Gideon breaking Jenien’s barrier in an instant.

*Even my skills are no match.*

“Je-nien!”

Vanessa slammed the stakes as if venting her anger. Of course, there was no answer.

“Jenien Pokis Polis Stargera Grandpa!”

“Hey!”

Suddenly, with a loud noise, Jenien opened the window from the house that had seemingly grown taller and yelled at the top of his lungs.

“Who’s the grandpa! Can’t you be quiet!”

“You’re louder, Grandpa! When was I ever loud!”

Vanessa shouted back, and Jenien looked at her with a look that said she was crazy.

Apparently, Jenien was a wizard famous for his terrible personality, so he probably hadn’t seen many people shouting like Vanessa.

Of course, Vanessa wasn’t scared of Jenien at all.

“No, why are you crying as soon as you arrive? Did your hand hurt from hitting the stakes?”

“Quickly calm down these poison-spitting flowers!”

As Jenien reluctantly – *is she crazy?* – calmed the flowers, Vanessa huffed and puffed, carrying her large luggage, passed through the front yard, and opened the door to enter.

“Jenien.”

As Vanessa said with a determined look in her wet eyes, Jenien hid behind the curtain with a look of terror, not knowing what would come out. Of course, his large body was not even half-covered.

“I have someone I like.”

“That’s too bad. There’s no emotion as useless as affection. Especially if it doesn’t come back. Judging by how you’re crying, it seems like it won’t be coming back.”

Jenien clicked his tongue and accurately hit the core of the issue, shocking Vanessa.

*No, how does that grandpa know that?*

“Does Jenien know that too?”

Jenien snorted and swung the stick he was holding, which was about the size of someone’s head. Vanessa’s luggage in his hand disappeared through a door hanging in the air.

“Rest on your own and don’t bother me.”

“I don’t want to.”

Vanessa huffed.

“Let me give you some advice. If you want to become a great wizard, put aside things like affection. Do you have a lot of time? Or confess and get rejected.”

Jenien, who picked his ear, said firmly, causing Vanessa to slump.

Vanessa practiced not revealing her emotions, which were jumping around, in Jenien’s house, which held so many memories with Gideon.

It was good practice because memories of him were hanging in the front yard, in the lake hidden in the forest, and in the fountain in Nimrod Square.

In the meantime, Jenien threw two sneers for one of Vanessa’s spells, and five sneers for two spells.

“You still can’t control your magic power. Kids these days! It’s a waste to even call them stupid.”

Of course, after saying that, he would subtly mutter the answer or method. Still, Vanessa glared at Jenien and mixed vinegar into his meal the next day.

By the time she left Nimrod, Vanessa had become better at hiding her emotions. But the letter from Gideon was still unopened.

And even after returning to the Academy, the seal on that letter was not broken. For a very long time.