The Failure Marquis Is A Genius [EN]: Chapter 8

The Earl’s Scion is a Genius – Episode 8 (8/200)

Chapter 1: Reincarnation: The Scion Taking a Dump

‘The Scion defeated Prince Phillip in a head-on fight!’

An unexpected upset occurred.

After Phillip fell to the ground, the training grounds remained as silent as a graveyard.

It was because everyone needed time to accept and understand what had just happened before their eyes.

“Am I dreaming right now?”

“I think I’m dreaming too…”

“Was the Scion always that strong?”

“Even so, who would have thought he’d beat the Prince.”

As everyone was in confusion,

The one who restored order to the arena was, as expected, Earl Lloyd.

“Phillip has fallen to the ground. Are you just going to stand there dumbfounded? Get him to his chambers immediately!”

“Yes, yes!”

“The estate must function normally. Train and work as usual. Understood?”

“Yes! Understood!”

The Earl, having taken care of the surroundings, now looked at me.

“And you, Henon. Come with me.”

“Yes, Earl.”

I followed the limping Earl into his office.

Come to think of it, it was my first time visiting my father’s workspace.

The Earl’s office was very simple.

The shelves were bare, without any of the common luxury items that nobles usually display for decoration.

However, various types of iron swords hung on the wall, suggesting the Earl’s interest in swordsmanship.

Earl Lloyd, sitting at the head of the table, offered me a seat opposite him.

Sebastian brought warm tea and placed one in front of each of us.

The Earl took a sip of the tea with rising steam and opened his mouth.

“You’ve really caused a stir.”

“It was bound to happen someday.”

“You were hiding your claws to become the heir?”

“That’s right.”

“Are you saying all your past misbehavior was an act? I think that was a bit of an over-the-top performance.”

“……”

The Earl, tapping the teacup with his fingertip, continued.

“It’s going to be tough for you from now on.”

“I’m prepared for it.”

“You’re just making things harder for yourself.”

Another awkward silence followed.

That’s how it usually is between father and son.

Especially with a son who was called a scoundrel until recently.

Around this point, I decided to bring up my business.

“Um… Earl.”

“Speak.”

“I have a request.”

“What is it?”

“I want to go into the secret vault.”

“!”

The Earl’s eyebrows twitched.

That was because the family vault was a place where all sorts of precious items collected by the Lloyd family were stored.

Even Sebastian, his right-hand man, was not allowed to enter this place.

But I had to go in there.

From the start, the reason I escalated things by dueling with Phillip was to secure the justification to enter the vault.

“Is it not possible?”

“Is there a special reason you want to go there?”

“It’s just curiosity. Isn’t it a place that no one except the Earl has ever been?”

Of course, that’s not true.

There’s an item I desperately want in the vault.

But I didn’t want to arouse the Earl’s suspicion by revealing my true intentions, so I just made up an excuse about curiosity.

“Today, by defeating Phillip, I proved that I have at least the minimum qualifications to compete for the heirship.”

“So?”

“Please, just help me once!”

I quickly bowed my head.

So I didn’t see what expression the Earl was making.

But I thought I heard Sebastian, who was standing by the door, snicker.

“You seem to have some fantasy about the secret vault, but there’s nothing grand in there.”

“I know.”

“And you still want to go in?”

“Yes.”

Earl Lloyd scratched his cheek and pondered.

He was probably judging whether taking me to the secret vault would be interfering in the heir competition.

The Earl had to maintain strict neutrality between the two.

However, it’s not like I’m asking for power, or land, or gold and jewels, so simply asking to enter the vault isn’t a burdensome request.

As expected, Earl Lloyd readily agreed.

“Alright. Just one thing. I’ll let you take whatever you want from the vault.”

“Can’t I have two?”

“Shall I cancel it then?”

“I’ll just take one.”

I almost lost everything trying to bargain.

* * *

Surprisingly, the secret vault was located in Earl Lloyd’s personal bedroom.

When I pushed aside the painting hanging on the wall (it depicted an oak tree), there was a click! and one side of the wall rotated, revealing a hidden space beyond.

“Come in.”

Honestly, I was looking forward to seeing what was inside.

I grabbed my pounding heart and went in…

“Wow!”

Jewels that looked expensive at a glance.

High-quality swords that couldn’t be compared to the iron swords hanging in the office.

Various other weapons and armor.

Stacks of gold coins higher than my height.

Unidentifiable objects with an exotic feel.

Contrary to the Earl’s words that there was nothing much, this was a gold mine.

The Earl wasn’t frugal.

He was a cheapskate pretending to be frugal.

‘Come to think of it, he’s one of the Seven Stars who saved the continent from the Demon King, so he should have this much wealth.’

Suddenly, my motivation soared.

Until now, I’ve been moving to survive as Henon and to get out of this game world.

But looking at this, maybe it’s okay to just settle down in the Earl’s territory?

Earl Henon Lloyd.

How cool is that name!

“Hurry up and pick one.”

I was lost in imagination when the Earl’s words snapped me back to reality.

That’s right.

I had a purpose for coming here.

Let’s get my head straight.

I’m not Henon Lloyd, I’m Henon Tris.

A bastard who couldn’t even receive the Lloyd name.

I slapped both hands on my cheeks to regain my senses and looked around the secret vault.

The item I wanted wasn’t easily visible.

How long did I search?

In the far corner of the vault, I found something long wrapped tightly in cloth.

While the other items were shining and boasting their luster, only this one seemed to be full of shabbiness.

‘That’s it!’

I instinctively knew it was the item I was looking for.

As if possessed, I moved towards it.

“Earl, what is that sword? At first glance, it seems like an item that doesn’t belong here.”

“I don’t know either.”

The Earl’s answer was surprisingly, “I don’t know.”

“An old colleague left it with me, saying it was an interesting sword. He’s a very eccentric fellow.”

“If it’s a sword, it’s just a sword, is there such a thing as an interesting sword?”

“How would I know what’s in that guy’s head? I’m just keeping it for now.”

When I took off the old cloth, a crude longsword was revealed.

Nothing special about it, just plain itself.

But I couldn’t not know this sword.

It was the very sword that the protagonist Sion wielded in Sionlike [a popular game in Henon’s previous world].

“I’ll take this.”

“Really? This kind of opportunity is rare. If I were you, I’d take something that makes money and prepare for the future.”

“I feel a sense of kinship.”

“What do you mean?”

“In this place full of splendor, the only one wrapped in an old cloth looks like me.”

The Earl was silent.

Soon he sighed.

“Alright. Take it.”

* * *

The introduction of Sionlike is like this.

Henon, who has become a spirit, rampages in the Lloyd Earl’s estate garden.

Earl Lloyd and the butler Sebastian are killed trying to stop him.

Sion accidentally discovers the secret vault in the collapsing Earl’s estate.

In a hurry, she takes out an old sword and confronts Henon.

Henon is seriously injured from the battle with Earl Lloyd and Sebastian.

With the help of the sword, Sion safely defeats the first boss.

After that, she continues to carry the sword and proceeds with boss raids.

‘It looks like this, but in fact, this sword is an Ego Sword [a sword in which a soul is sealed].’

An Ego Sword refers to a sword in which a soul is sealed.

Although she was injured, the reason why Sion, who was only a user-level warrior, was able to defeat the powerful spirit Henon was also thanks to the help of the Ego Sword.

And that Ego Sword was currently in Henon’s hands.

“Hello? Can you hear me?”

Toc toc.

I knocked, but there was no response.

The story released by the game company had little information about the Ego Sword.

Anyway, the protagonist of this game was Sion, and she had to unfold the story around her.

When a few maniac users asked about the identity of the Ego Sword on the Sionlike bulletin board, the management team gave this answer.

‘You will naturally find out as you play the game. We’ll leave it as an Easter egg ^^’

After that, the talk about the sword disappeared.

It was also a new game that had been released for a short time, and the balance was so bad that everyone quit in the early stages.

I only knew that the voice I heard in the game was male.

“Hey! I know you’re in there.”

Toc toc.

I knocked again, but there was no response.

I was a little embarrassed.

In the game, as soon as Sion grabbed the sword, it kindly told her this and that.

Why am I getting no response?

Come to think of it, Earl Lloyd didn’t seem to know that this sword was an Ego Sword either.

“Hello, I’m Henon, the Earl’s good-for-nothing scion.”

I also introduced myself.

“What do you want to cut? Animals? Humans? Undead? Monsters?

I also chatted.

“Oh! Great Holy Sword! May its glory last forever~”

I also sang a song.

“Hey, you stupid and dull sword! You look so bad, can you even be used?”

I poured out insults and provoked it, but it remained silent.

Finally, I came to a conclusion.

This sword may not be an Ego Sword.

I might be mistaken and brought a different sword.

So, let’s check it one last time, and if there’s still no answer, let’s throw it into Lake Heinz near the Earl’s estate.

“Okay. Just a sword, huh?”

I took the sword and went out the door.

I ran into Sion, who was walking down the hallway.

“You’re up early. What is that sword?”

“It’s none of your business. More than that, is there a separate latrine in the inner castle for your employees to use?”

“Yes, there is.”

“Guide me there. I want to take care of my business there today.”

Sion frowned at my words.

“Young master, that place is quite dirty. It’s a space that’s not managed well and used roughly, so there are many bugs.”

“It’s okay, guide me.”

Sion made a face that said, ‘What’s in that scoundrel’s head?’ and guided me to the latrine used by the servants.

“Is this it?”

“Yes.”

Indeed, it was worth being disgusted.

Sion frowned at the stench coming from afar.

It’s an era without modern plumbing.

Of course, this public latrine can only be a pit toilet.

“In fact, our maids also use chamber pots, so they hardly come here. Only servants with strong stomachs occasionally come and relieve themselves.”

“I see. That’s even better.”

“Yes?”

“Go now.”

“Still…”

“Why, do you want to see me taking a dump? I’ll open the door and take a dump, so watch closely.”

Sion hesitated, then ran away like an arrow at my words.

I opened the creaking wooden door and entered the latrine, where an unbearable stench greeted me.

It is said that the sense of smell is the fastest sense to adapt among human senses.

After coming here and smelling it, that’s nonsense.

Not only that.

Cockroaches, centipedes, dung flies, mosquitoes, etc., this is a haven for all kinds of bugs.

But the conditions above the latrine are nothing.

The real hell is under the latrine hole.

I could see well enough from above how well that poop piled up under the dark hole had fermented.

Finally, I arrived at my destination.

I squatted down without putting my butt near the latrine hole.

The sword still has no reaction.

“Today is the day I feel like I’m going to accidentally drop the sword into the latrine hole while taking care of my business!”

Then I positioned the sword slightly over the latrine hole.

Oh, is that so?

Are you still going to stay silent?

“I’m really going to drop it. I’m serious.”

Still silence.

I can’t help it.

“5, 4, 3, 2, 1… Goodbye.”

Just as I was about to let go of the sword,

A voice echoed in my head like a thunderbolt.

– Hey, you son of a bitch!!!!’