The Rap Star [EN]: Chapter 223

< Verse 34. Reminiscence (End) – End of Volume 9 >

***

“……What the hell are you guys doing?!”

Sanghyun’s voice, filled with shock, echoed through the alley. It was because of the movements of two figures Sanghyun spotted in the back alley of his house as he was heading home.

The two figures in the alley flinched at Sanghyun’s shout.

“I said, what are you doing?”

As Sanghyun approached, the two stepped back.

The flinching pair weren’t Chainhyun or Hong Gyungsu, nor were they people sent by Oh Gyung Group.

It was Sangmi and Junhyung.

However, the reason Sanghyun was so shocked was because Sangmi and Junhyung were holding hands tightly, looking like they were obviously on a date.

“Oh… Sanghyun.”

Junhyung looked at Sanghyun and smiled awkwardly. But they were still holding hands.

As the shock subsided, the situation became clear at once.

“Lee Sangmi…! No wonder you were all dolled up in the studio!”

“So what! I want to date! Is it any of your business!”

“Is it none of my business?!”

“Well… it’s not that it’s none of your business… but still! So what! You date too!”

“Is that how you talk to your older brother?”

“So! So what! What are you going to do about it!”

Sangmi retorted fiercely. But Sanghyun couldn’t help but laugh.

He had no right to interfere with Sangmi’s husband, but now he suddenly had the right to critique her boyfriend.

“Both of you… no, just Shin Junhyung, come with me!”

“Why! I’m going too!”

However, when Sanghyun brought up Sangmi’s embarrassing moments from her childhood, Sangmi had no choice but to grumble and wait in the living room.

Thus, the critique session began in Sanghyun’s room.

“Since when?”

“Huh? Not long… about a week?”

“No, not since you started dating. Since you started liking each other.”

“That’s been a while….”

Listening to Junhyung, it seemed that Junhyung had been paying a lot of attention to Sangmi from the start. His affection developed from liking her so naturally that it was hard to pinpoint a specific time.

‘Ah, that’s right.’

Now that he thought about it, Junhyung had done quite a few things for Sangmi that went beyond the level of a friend’s older brother.

The banana-flavored products Junhyung had prepared for Sangmi when they went to their parents’ columbarium [a place for the respectful and usually public storage of urns holding cremated remains] weren’t just one or two. Considering that there were products he had never seen before, it must have taken a lot of effort to pick them out.

“When did Sangmi start showing it?”

“When you went to New York….”

Sangmi seemed to know Junhyung’s feelings but didn’t show it much because she was being sly.

Then, in the moment when her brother disappeared, she made her move…….

“Hey! You guys didn’t do anything, did you?!”

Junhyung jumped at Sanghyun’s question.

“What would we do!”

“Just holding hands?!”

“Yeah! Of course! Absolutely! Of course!”

Sanghyun withdrew his suspicious gaze. Knowing all of Junhyung’s habits, this was true.

Of course, Sanghyun had no reason to dislike Junhyung.

Especially at this point, it was very welcome that Junhyung was taking special care of Sangmi.

But you never know what might happen between a man and a woman, and from the moment the relationship goes wrong, they become worse than strangers.

Junhyung was a friend he had known for 38 years, no, now 40 years, and a colleague standing with him on the lonely road.

Sangmi was, needless to say, the most precious person to Sanghyun.

So if they were to break up after dating, if they were to become worse than strangers, Sanghyun would inevitably lose one of them. Knowing this, Junhyung and Sangmi had hidden the fact that they were dating from Sanghyun.

‘Hey, what am I thinking.’

But Sanghyun soon shook his head.

Even if he opposed it and they broke up, it wouldn’t return the relationship to its original state, and decisively, he didn’t want to oppose it. He knew Junhyung’s character and humanity best.

Also, the most important value that Sanghyun upheld was ‘noble impulse.’

Being faithful to the present moment and choosing what you truly want to do.

It goes without saying that this impulse wasn’t just something he had. Junhyung and Sangmi had it too.

So if he were to suppress their legitimate impulses just because he was a little worried about the future, what could be more selfish than that.

“Hey.”

“Uh……?”

“Try to get married if possible.”

“What?”

“Finally, you’re officially becoming my junior. Not bad, huh?”

Junhyung smiled belatedly at Sanghyun’s words.

“Hey! But Sangmi is still a high school student. If you do anything stupid before she turns twenty, I’ll cut you off.”

“Of course!”

“That ‘of course’ is often not kept.”

“Hey, I really don’t want to say this in this situation, but don’t pretend to know me just because you’ve become my brother-in-law. We both know we’re equally pure(?).”

Sanghyun felt frustrated at Junhyung’s words.

He felt a growing desire to teach this guy the true meaning of the 6th track of 56 JFTR [Joint Federal Travel Regulations, a set of rules governing travel for US federal employees].

“Ah, okay. Let’s say that’s true… are you stupid? What brother-in-law? Do you want to be executed?”

“Why? Aren’t I her brother-in-law? Then am I her brother-in-law? But brother-in-law is the wife’s younger brother, and brother-in-law is the wife’s older brother, right?”

“It’s ‘hyungnim’ [Korean term for older brother, used by males].”

“Ah, no way!”

At that moment, Sangmi burst into the room.

“What’s with all the titles, you idiots! Am I even married yet! Let’s eat!”

Sangmi shouted and stomped out to the living room.

Sanghyun, left behind, was silent for a moment before whispering to Junhyung.

“Hey, but you have really unique taste. Haven’t you seen all sorts of things while living with us three?”

“Why? What’s wrong with it. Isn’t she cute when she’s angry?”

“……You’re crazy.”

Sanghyun cursed at Junhyung with all his heart for the first time. This guy must be crazy.

But if he’s going to be crazy, he hoped he would be crazy about Sangmi until he died.

At that moment, an idea flashed through his mind.

“Hey, where are you going to live now?”

“What do you mean where am I going to live? I’ll live here? The studio is close, and the transportation is good.”

“Then what about Sangmi?”

“Uh……?”

Junhyung’s expression changed from bewilderment to realization, and from realization to a suggestive look.

Then Sanghyun smacked Junhyung on the back of the head and said.

“Sangmi will be living in the dorm from her second year. Got it?”

“Okay.”

Junhyung nodded obediently.

It wasn’t a good idea in Korean sentiment for Sangmi and Junhyung to be left alone in the house after Sanghyun left. Besides, Sangmi and Junhyung were celebrities, so they shouldn’t give rise to gossip.

“When are you leaving?”

“I was going to tell you anyway, but I got my visa a while ago. I’m debating whether to go after getting my diploma or before.”

“Get your diploma and go. You should also stop by Woosan High School and say hello to the teachers.”

“Would that be better?”

Sanghyun felt a deep regret on Junhyung’s face as he nodded.

“There’s no way I can get you to come with me, right?”

“Of course not. You’ve achieved most of what you can achieve in Korea, but we haven’t.”

Sanghyun chuckled at Junhyung’s answer.

“Just say you can’t speak English. Why are you packaging it so nicely.”

“Did you catch me?”

Junhyung also chuckled. Being together 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, their smiling faces were so similar that you could believe they were brothers.

“Take good care of Sangmi.”

“Don’t even think about coming back until you get Eminem, Jay-Z, Kanye, Nas, T.I., Snoop Dogg, Dr. Dre, Gucci Mane, Guru, and DJ Premier’s autographs.”

“Why don’t you just include Tupac, Biggie, and Big L too?”

“Then the chances are zero. Zero is too cruel, isn’t it?”

“Don’t just play around while I’m gone. I’ll cut you off when I get back.”

“I’m the leader, remember?”

Sanghyun and Junhyung laughed at the same time.

In this way, Sanghyun was able to resolve the part about Sangmi that he was most concerned about before leaving for America.

It wasn’t intentional, but it was so natural.

In the past, Bae Ga of Stars Records had seen Sanghyun’s actions and expressed that it seemed like ‘someone was artificially pushing him to succeed.’

That’s how Sanghyun felt now.

It felt like someone was helping him go to America.

And Sanghyun was thinking of that someone as fate.

***

With his plane ticket to America booked for February 27th, Sanghyun’s farewell party was held in the studio the day before his departure.

A lot of people gathered at the studio.

Not only 888 Crew, L&S, and Stars Records, but also Soul Makers, Dread, Chae Daehan, Park Hyeyeon, Na Hansoo PD of CBC Broadcasting Station, Heo Taejin PD of KMNET, Hong CEO of Sejong Musical Instrument Store, and Han Gwangsoo of Gwangju Tigers, who had become friends through exchanges with Caliph. Numerous people gathered to cheer on Sanghyun’s future.

Because Oh Yeonjoo, who couldn’t attend due to her busy schedule, had a catering buffet brought in, the farewell party, which was supposed to be small, far exceeded the scope of smallness.

It was already foreseen from the moment people gathered like this.

“Is this a farewell party or a party?”

Like Sanghyun’s grumbling, the studio was like a party venue where music and laughter never stopped.

“Lee Sanghyun is leaving! Let’s raise a toast!”

“Korea’s air pollution has been resolved!”

Inhyuk, who was visiting the new studio for the first time, shouted, and many people raised their glasses in response.

Because Sanghyun and Junhyung were both legally adults, everyone was sipping beer. Only Sangmi, who couldn’t drink alcohol, was drinking juice.

“Wow, no way.”

“Ugh, disgusting.”

The fact that Junhyung, not Sanghyun, was the one monitoring Sangmi to make sure she didn’t drink alcohol made people feel awkward.

“Ah, my girlfriend’s parents are coming to Korea next year, so the wedding has been postponed…… If that happens, you won’t be able to sing the congratulatory song?”

“Hyung [Korean term for older brother or male friend], if I sang a congratulatory song, I would have sung ‘Tears of a Man’ or ‘First Love Never Fades.’ Think of it positively.”

Sanghyun made a threat disguised as comfort to Han Gwangsoo’s grumbling. After talking with Han Gwangsoo, Sanghyun approached Park Hyeyeon, who was hesitating whether to eat sushi in the corner.

“Eat it. What are you hesitating about so much.”

“I have a shoot tomorrow. Actually, I came here after skipping today’s shoot, and if my face is swollen tomorrow, the director won’t like it.”

“Noona [Korean term for older sister, used by males] is a visual actress, so it’s okay.”

Sanghyun approached people and talked to them one by one. Because today was the last day.

Of course, he wasn’t planning on staying in America forever. But Sanghyun wasn’t going to return to Korea unless he met the standards of success he had set for himself.

Sangmi was following Sanghyun’s side.

Holding Sanghyun’s hand, Sangmi stood quietly.

She wasn’t complaining or whining about him leaving for America. Rather, Sangmi was the one who was most happy when Sanghyun said he was leaving for America.

Since she had developed agoraphobia, Sangmi had a sense of guilt that her brother couldn’t do what he wanted because of her.

The reason Sangmi was following Sanghyun’s side was simply because she wanted to feel the warmth of her only family, who was like a father, an older brother, and a friend, a little more, even though she didn’t express it much.

“Ah, Sangmi, do you know this oppa [Korean term for older brother, used by females]?”

“Of course I know him. Can’t you tell?”

Sanghyun chuckled at Dread, who couldn’t hide his awkwardness in front of Sangmi.

Dread had done an interview for Sanghyun, risking being kicked out of Oh Gyung Media. Thanks to that, no one among the people gathered at the studio disliked Dread. Everyone knew that Sanghyun and Dread were quite close too.

But Dread himself was constantly restless, remembering his actions at the Mudeung Stadium.

Then Sanghyun opened his mouth.

“He’s a bit reckless and stupid, but he’s still a good hyung. But well, he’s going to the army soon, so there won’t be much to be close with.”

“Ah, you’re going to the army? Have a good service, oppa.”

“Uh, yeah.”

Sanghyun held out his hand to Dread, who was just blinking at Sangmi’s greeting.

“Hyung, have a good service.”

“Uh…… you too.”

Dread shook hands with Sanghyun, and Sanghyun soon left.

Dread kept feeling something awkward until he realized that Lee Sanghyun had called him ‘hyung’ for the first time.

‘Wait, but where did this bastard sell his honorifics?’

Dread thought so, but shook his head. If he had heard honorifics, he might have gotten goosebumps because it would have been creepy.

Then Junhyung approached Dread.

“Hyung, you’re also learning rap from the composer hyung, right? Like Sanghyun?”

“Uh? That’s right.”

“What exactly are you learning? What’s the curriculum like?”

“Ah, I’m not learning composition…….”

That’s how the story began between Dread and the 888 Crew members.

After finishing his greetings with Na Hansoo PD, Sanghyun suddenly wanted to capture this scene in a photo.

***

“He’s gone.”

“Yeah.”

The 888 Crew members and L&S members sat in the car for a long time, watching Sanghyun’s back as he entered the airport.

They wanted to go into the airport together and see him off, but it was clear that if 888 Crew and L&S appeared at the airport together, it would cause inconvenience to other airport users.

Sangmi and Junhyung tried to follow, but Sanghyun smiled and entered the airport alone.

The 888 Crew and L&S members waited in the car without saying a word, and after a while, the plane Sanghyun was on left Incheon Airport.

“Hey, what is this feeling? It’s not like Sanghyun went to war, but the feeling is really strange.”

“I know, I was thinking about what this feeling is too.”

Junhyung said to Minsik’s question.

Like their words, Sanghyun leaving for America wasn’t exactly a sad thing. It’s not like he’s not coming back, and he’s not leaving for a bad reason.

Rather, from the perspective of a fellow musician, it was right to envy Sanghyun for pursuing his dreams in America.

But their feeling was far from envy.

“Ah, is this perhaps the relief that a competitor has left?”

Junhyung was being cheesy, but no one really accepted it. Not even Inhyuk.

Eventually, the car became quiet, and silence lingered. In the silence, people gradually realized what their feelings were.

It was a lack of stability.

The vague belief that no matter what happened, Sanghyun would solve it. The great sense of stability that came from that belief had disappeared.

But this wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Excessive stability was also a factor that hindered innovation.

In other words, the 888 Crew would be pursuing growth with their backs to the wall from now on.

***

Inhyuk took a train to Gwangju from Yongsan Station after seeing Sanghyun off.

It felt really strange that he was the only one heading to Gwangju while the other members were returning to the studio.

The psychological distance was definitely not, but it felt like a layer of wall had formed in the physical distance.

If more time passed, wouldn’t the physical distance soon become a psychological distance?

Inhyuk was feeling a feeling that he hadn’t felt before while studying. It was that it was okay to go this way.

No, rather, it was that he could succeed.

Before he started making music, he didn’t know what it meant to do his best. But while making music, he developed a habit of doing his best, and when he started studying while maintaining that habit, the difficulties that had blocked him before were breaking down so easily.

He still loved music so much, but he thought this wasn’t bad either. Becoming a son who meets his parents’ expectations by working hard like this.

In this way, Inhyuk, who returned home, headed straight to the study room.

But strangely, he couldn’t study.

‘Since I’m going back to the boarding academy tomorrow anyway.’

Inhyuk couldn’t concentrate for more than 2 hours, so he turned on his laptop and accessed the Hiphopplaya website.

But the bulletin board was plastered with the word ‘Lee Sanghyun’.

‘What? Is it already known?’

It wasn’t a secret that Sanghyun was leaving for America, but it wasn’t like they were spreading rumors everywhere.

When he checked the bulletin board in detail, the topic of the posts was not ‘America’ but ‘New Song’.

‘New song?’

Inhyuk was soon able to confirm the title of the new song.

Reminiscence. A memoir, or a recollection.

The moment he connected the earphones to his laptop, Sanghyun’s voice filled Inhyuk’s ears.

‘Huh?’

And the moment Sanghyun’s verse ended, a voice he had heard a lot began to flow out.

It was his own voice.

“Keu…….”

As Inhyuk let out a low exclamation, the people around the study room glared at Inhyuk. But Inhyuk didn’t care.

He didn’t even think about paying attention to his surroundings.

He was deeply immersed in Sanghyun’s and his own voice.

Inhyuk had recorded two choruses in Sanghyun’s studio in Gwangju as Sanghyun had requested. One was a love song, and the other was a song with the theme of ‘I’m doing well’.

But in fact, the two choruses were a trick. What Sanghyun wanted was a new chorus made by mixing the two choruses.

It was clear that he had intended and ordered it from the beginning.

Inhyuk suddenly couldn’t stand it. So he ran out of the study room. And then he immediately took a taxi to Gwangju Station.

His heart heading to the station was surprisingly calm.

It was as if it was a lie that he had thought it was okay to choose the path of studying just a few minutes ago.

Inhyuk was finally able to confirm his heart. No, it was so simple that he wondered why he had been worrying about it.

He could study well, and he could make music well.

If so, it was natural to do what he liked more.

Sanghyun had given him the answer as if he had already experienced these worries. Even with his own voice, not Sanghyun’s voice.

‘Since I’m away for a while, it’s time for hyung to come back.’

It was as if he could hear Sanghyun’s voice.

Inhyuk bought a train ticket and headed to Seoul.

A train that has started once can never go backwards. Just like Inhyuk chose music.

Through the earphones connected to Inhyuk’s laptop, which he hadn’t turned off, Sanghyun’s Reminiscence was constantly echoing.

***

During that time, I worked hard and let it flow,

Even if it has nothing to do with money, it’s not bad

I was immature and learning about life 2 years ago

It was the same as now, I rewind the memories of that time

The repetition of writing and spitting out lyrics

Satisfied with this, I continue the process and develop again

My sensibility has changed since high school

But what’s the same is that the possibility is still there

Gathering in front of Chungjangro Street in ’05

Immature but burning with passion before the performance

Promoting with Freestyle, attracting attention

We Eight, shouting with a cheap amp

Chungjangro Sejong Musical Instrument Store and the smooth line of Jeondae

L&S, 888, that’s the name of our family

The circle, the connection continues now

Even at this time, I pray that we all laugh together.

I remember this time even when time passes,

I hope we are eternal in this song

I hope everything goes well – I hope everything goes well –

After putting down all the problems,

Let’s meet completely cool

I have no religion and come back to step on Gwangju land again

New brothers and sisters I met in a new environment

Hip hop from Ochi-dong to Pyeongchang-dong

The faith that grows with the brothers who have become one with rhythm

It becomes more solid, raises the heat even more

Pouring the oil of passion

Let’s not forget our memories even later

Let’s prove it with music and have happiness again

I’m really happy, always foolishly

Even if it’s funny, I’m satisfied with the repeated daily life

I’m glad that there are people with the same purpose

I hope it goes well without changing and purely

L&S and 888, put this position higher

Write the name big that the beginning is here

I hope everything goes well for all my friends around me

Let’s walk together on the long uphill

I remember this time even when time passes,

I hope we are eternal in this song

I hope everything goes well – I hope everything goes well –

After putting down all the problems,

Let’s meet completely cool

*Original song information

(Reminiscence – Sneeze(스니즈) feat. Maxipub.J)

***

February 27, 2007.

The moment Sanghyun started a new leap in America, 888 Crew was also facing a new leap.

< Verse 34. Reminiscence (End) – End of Volume 9 > End

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