Descent of The Demon Master [EN]: Chapter 719

“Hello.”

“Yeah, hi.”

Park Yu-min, having stepped outside, ran into Kwak Hyun-tae. Kwak Hyun-tae lowered his head upon seeing him.

‘It’s still awkward.’

As a pro, competition is unavoidable.

No, perhaps competition is unavoidable for anyone. There might be a world where everyone can live happily, but at least this isn’t it.

Even knowing that, facing a competitor was still awkward. Especially when that competition was almost over, and he was the victor.

“Did you practice well?”

“I guess so.”

Park Yu-min replied awkwardly.

When he first came here for the tryouts, Kwak Hyun-tae was full of confidence. He was even arrogant. But Park Yu-min didn’t see it negatively.

In a world where you have to survive on your own skills, such arrogance is an advantage. Arrogance can only come from a firm belief in one’s own abilities.

It was an enviable trait.

However, as Park Yu-min began to surpass him, Kwak Hyun-tae became dejected. The arrogance of the past was nowhere to be found. While being moderately humble is a good thing, Kwak Hyun-tae had shrunk as if he were a different person.

It wasn’t a good thing, but…

‘There’s nothing I can do.’

If Park Yu-min wasn’t Kwak Hyun-tae’s direct rival, he might have had plenty of advice to give. But Park Yu-min was the one who took Kwak Hyun-tae’s place. What could he possibly say?

“Then, I’ll be going.”

“Ah, senior.”

“Yeah?”

“…Could we talk for a bit?” Seeing his neatly folded hands fidgeting, Park Yu-min quietly nodded.

“What should I do?” The words came out as soon as they sat down at the cafe.

Park Yu-min couldn’t hide his bewilderment.

“What do you mean by that?”

“…I’ve been practicing. I’m trying my best, but strangely, my skills don’t seem to be improving.”

“Hmm…”

Park Yu-min leaned back in his chair.

“It feels like I’ve already hit my limit, and I’m wondering if I should start looking for something else…”

Park Yu-min sighed and opened his mouth.

“Can I ask you something first?”

“Yes.”

“Why are you asking me that?”

“…Yes?”

Kwak Hyun-tae looked up and met Park Yu-min’s eyes.

“I thought I’d be the most awkward person for you. So why are you asking me this? There are many other people you could talk to. Like the coach.”

“Ah…”

Kwak Hyun-tae started fidgeting with his fingers again.

‘Jin-ho must have felt like this before.’

Park Yu-min was like that too.

Kwak Hyun-tae was temporarily lacking confidence, but Park Yu-min had always lacked it. That’s why when others asked him something, he hesitated and couldn’t answer.

He was afraid that others would take his answers negatively. Knowing that feeling well, Park Yu-min didn’t rush Kwak Hyun-tae.

He knew that in these situations, it was best to just wait.

“Because you’re my senior.”

“Huh?”

“Who in the gaming world isn’t thrilled by your matches? I was your fan when I was an amateur.”

“…Thanks.”

It seemed like the answer was off the mark, but Park Yu-min expressed his gratitude anyway.

And he could interpret the answer on his own.

People tend to emulate even the worldview of those they idolize. If the person they respect is an animal lover, they try to take an interest in animals, and if the person they respect is a vegetarian, they at least try to learn about vegetarianism.

In that vein, it meant that there was a vague expectation that Park Yu-min would have the answer to his concerns.

Park Yu-min sighed deeply.

‘I’m not that great of a person.’

Even though he had gotten older and his position had changed, it was still uncomfortable to be expected of someone. He himself hadn’t changed much from before.

“You feel like your skills aren’t improving?”

“Yes.”

“It doesn’t seem like you’re asking about how to improve your skills in terms of method, but rather, you’re worried about what to do as a pro?”

“Yes. After all, a player’s career isn’t that long. If I don’t have the talent or potential, it might be better to look for another path.”

Park Yu-min slowly nodded.

It wasn’t wrong.

But there was a slight sense of unease.

“Why did you think that?”

“…I told you, my prospects…”

“It doesn’t seem like that’s why.”

“Yes?”

Park Yu-min quietly looked at Kwak Hyun-tae and said,

“Even if you don’t have prospects, I don’t think you should be worrying about that at your age. At nineteen, being in this position means you have great talent, your salary is top-tier compared to your peers, and you have plenty of room for growth.”

“But if you’re thinking of quitting, it means there’s another reason. Then it’s one of two things. Either you’re no longer enjoying the game, or playing the game is painful…”

“N-no, that’s not it.”

Kwak Hyun-tae shook his hand.

“I still like the game. Of course, I can’t enjoy it as much as I used to, but I still like playing games.”

Kwak Hyun-tae’s face was sincere.

“Then you’re scared, aren’t you?”

“Scared of the game… Well, everyone goes through that at least once. There was a time when I was scared to even hold the mouse.”

“You had times like that too, senior?”

“I couldn’t even eat properly before big tournaments.”

“Ah…”

Park Yu-min shook his head.

“No matter how hard I tried to fix it, it wouldn’t. I don’t know if it’s because I’m naturally timid, but whenever there was a big match, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat. And when I looked at the monitor, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I even went to psychological counseling several times. They told me it was because of the pressure and to relax, but if I could relax, I wouldn’t have gone to the hospital.”

“That’s true…”

“Well, what can you do? If it were another sport, I could take medicine, but since I need to control things so delicately, I can’t even take cold medicine. In the end, I just had to endure it.”

“…Yes.”

“Then let’s hear it. Why are you scared of playing games?”

Kwak Hyun-tae lowered his head. He didn’t answer and pondered for a long time. Park Yu-min didn’t rush him.

Sometimes, a concern that seems trivial to others can be a very serious concern for the person involved. Park Yu-min was like that too. Looking back now, things that were nothing at the time felt like deathly pain.

If he hadn’t met Kang Jin-ho, he would still be suffering from similar pain.

‘So I have to wait.’

Even if he couldn’t approach others first and listen to their concerns, he shouldn’t refuse a hand when someone asks for help. That was what the head nun taught him, and what he learned from Kang Jin-ho.

“I’m afraid of becoming nothing again.”

“Nothing?”

“Yes.”

Kwak Hyun-tae answered heavily.

“Before I started playing games, I was subtly bullied among the kids.”

“Hmm…”

Park Yu-min’s face became a little serious.

“Looking back now, I think if I had lived that life a little longer, I might have been properly bullied. I was starting to see signs of it. But luckily, I was good at games, so the powerful kids wanted to play with me, and then… yes, then I even became a pro.”

“I see.”

“It’s a world where your life changes just by being good at games. I can’t imagine how I would be living now if I wasn’t good at games. But if I can’t be the best here either, I’m afraid I’ll go back to that life, and if I try my best here and still don’t get results, I’ll just waste time and fall back into the abyss… That’s what I’m thinking…”

Kwak Hyun-tae’s face was dark.

Park Yu-min quietly looked at Kwak Hyun-tae and then opened his mouth.

“Hyun-tae.”

“Yes, senior.”

“How many people do you think are called the best in the world?”

Kwak Hyun-tae looked up.

“Even if we count ten per sport, how many would there be? According to your logic, does that mean the rest of the people are living worthless lives?”

“No. That’s not it.”

“Right, it’s not. I know what you’re saying. I used to think that way too. I wanted to be the best. I thought it was meaningless if I wasn’t the best. I wanted to be the best here, at least. I would never lose here. Otherwise, I was a worthless person.”

Park Yu-min shrugged.

“I was worse than you. I’m also physically disabled. I thought that if I couldn’t be the best at games, I wouldn’t be able to escape the position of a socially disadvantaged person. So I played games obsessively. I did get results, but did I gain anything from it?”

“You became the best.”

“I did, in the past. Yes, in the past. Am I the best now?”

“No.”

Park Yu-min shook his head firmly.

“No one can maintain the top spot. Eventually, you have to come down. That’s what you want. The top spot. A spot that doesn’t last forever and remains as a past glory. If you reach that spot and come down, how much will your life change?”

Kwak Hyun-tae stared blankly at Park Yu-min. If someone else had said this, he would have called it nonsense. But Park Yu-min was someone who had reached the top. The words of such a person carried weight.

“It might be a bit early for me to say this. I’m still young too. But if I may be presumptuous, I think life is about building a mountain.”

“A mountain?”

“Yes. Not climbing, but building. Not rushing up to reach a goal and then coming down, but slowly gathering each moment and building it up.”

“Building…”

“The height of the mountain that people can build will be different. Because talents are different, and methods are different. But there’s no need to be disappointed if I’m not the best right now. Because I’m still building. Maybe someday I’ll be able to build a higher mountain. What if I stop building just because I’m building a lower mountain than the person next to me?”

“It won’t get any higher.”

“Right, that’s it.”

Park Yu-min smiled gently.

“You might see me as someone who came down from the peak and is now struggling to climb back up, but I don’t think that way. Those past lives are piled up beneath my feet. They’re the foundation for my current self. And now I’m building new things on top of that.”

“Ah…”

“They say it’s more important to do your best than to be the best. I used to think that was just lip service. I thought, what’s the point of doing your best if you can’t be the best and get results? But that’s not what it meant. It means that even if you become the best, if you don’t keep doing your best, you’ll eventually fall behind. It means that the person who always does their best, even if they don’t see anything in front of them right now, will eventually win.”

“It’s difficult.”

“Yes, it will be difficult.”

Park Yu-min smiled gently.

“Shall I put it a little more simply? It’ll be hard. You’ll have a lot of worries. You’ll be anxious. But who’s going to solve that for you? In the end, you have to decide your own path.”

“…Yes.”

“Worry. Worry as much as you want. But instead…”

Park Yu-min took a deep breath and said,

“Don’t stop walking while you’re worrying. Even if you have to go back, the fact that you took one more step will be a stepping stone in your life.”

“Even if it’s a waste of effort?”

“You’ll gain experience. Maybe your efforts won’t produce the best results right now. But at least if you try and work hard, wouldn’t you be a little better than if you did nothing?”

“…I guess so.”

“Keep building up those little bits. If you keep building, you’ll be much bigger before you know it. At least, that’s what I believe as I live.”

Kwak Hyun-tae scratched his head.

“It’s really difficult. But I think I vaguely understand what you mean.”

“Sorry I couldn’t be of more help.”

“No, hyung. You helped me. And…”

Kwak Hyun-tae stood up and bowed his head deeply.

“I’m really sorry for being arrogant before.”

“No need to be sorry. I’m going to be arrogant now too.”

“Yes?”

“I’m just kidding.”

Park Yu-min chuckled.

‘He must be worried.’

Everyone worries. Life isn’t easy for anyone. Nevertheless, you have to keep walking.

Park Yu-min turned his head to the west.

His friend was probably living his best life right now.

‘If I build up day by day, I’ll catch up someday. Even if it takes a lifetime.’

A relationship where they can help each other, not just one side receiving help.

The road to get there was still too far.

But Park Yu-min wouldn’t give up.

“Hyung.”

“Yeah?”

“Aren’t you checking your phone?”

“I left it behind, why?”

“You got a message… They said the scrim time is late and they’re looking for you?”

“Hee-ik!”

Park Yu-min jumped up from his seat. Then, he started running like crazy towards the practice room.

“I’m going first.”

“H-hyung!”

Kwak Hyun-tae watched Park Yu-min burst out of the cafe door and laughed in a daze.

“That hyung is a bit weird too.”

Even so, he felt a bit relieved.

Even if he couldn’t see clearly ahead, Kwak Hyun-tae decided to move forward and stood up from his seat.