George Bush’S Great America [EN]: Chapter 87

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“What is this?”

President Kim Ji-hoon, genuinely thinking he was dreaming, slapped himself hard on the cheek. The sound echoed sharply, drawing stares from everyone in the office.

It was an exaggerated reaction, rarely seen in real life. But when confronted with something utterly impossible—a ‘hallucination’—shouldn’t one do anything to escape the nightmare? What else could it be? If something defied comprehension, it had to be a nightmare.

“Am I still dreaming?”

Just as he was about to bang his head on the desk, his chief of staff, sensing something amiss, approached him.

“Sir, are you alright?”

“Then, are you suggesting I accept what’s in front of me as reality?”

He pointed to the document:

「The U.S. President Directly Requests 15 Tons of Polished Rice for North Korea. The cost will be covered by the federal government.」

“Is there anything strange about that?”

President Kim Ji-hoon wanted to scream, ‘Strange? Of course, it’s strange! Because that fighter jet would never say such a thing!’ He barely restrained himself, summoning every ounce of his patience. Though unspoken, President Kim Ji-hoon’s perception of Bush remained fixed as that ‘fighter jet’.

‘That bastard is one of a kind throughout history, East and West, who flew in on a fighter jet while talking about peace, and there will never be another like him for hundreds of years.’

“It seems they’re not planning to supply it for free.”

“There is a request. No, a demand.”

It was phrased as a request, but it felt more like a forceful urging. Moreover, the Kim Ji-hoon government was in no position to refuse such a proposal. South Korea was overflowing with surplus rice. The cost of storing it alone ran into hundreds of billions of won, stockpiling nearly two to three times the public reserve recommended by the Food and Agriculture Organization.

Government rice was released to the public for those in financial hardship, like basic livelihood recipients and elderly living alone, but that wasn’t enough to deplete the stock. From the start, storage conditions were poor, and rumors spread that the rice was sprayed with deadly pesticides, making it unsafe to eat. How many people would risk it?

Most military veterans complain about the food, partly because of the unique environment, but largely because it’s made with old rice. What’s released to the public is government rice, which becomes military rations in the army. Government agencies also used this government rice, which would later be derisively called ‘Nara Rice’ [Nation’s Rice, implying low quality].

They tried releasing it to public institutions, but it kept piling up. However, as aid to North Korea became a viable concept, it offered a way to clear the old rice stocks. The government could drastically reduce storage costs by leveraging the North Korea appeasement policy and distributing the old rice.

‘Is this what they mean by “killing two birds with one stone”?’

In any case, the diplomatic document from the United States requested the rice be given and that the political achievements of the Kim Ji-hoon government be maximized at the Olympics. Again, it was written as a request but read as a demand.

‘We have nothing to lose, but will Kim Jong-il accept this?’

Kim Jong-il was more on edge than ever. He wasn’t the kind of person to be swayed by a mere 15 tons of rice.

‘Is this an attempt to poke a fruit you can’t eat? Or has this been discussed in advance?’

The diplomatic document was thin, just one page filled with empty words. Still, it was clear that the U.S. President was unusually favorable to the South Korean government.

No matter how many American experts were consulted, they could only offer strange hypotheses as to why the U.S. President was so interested in Korean culture. The real reason remained unknown, but it seemed unlikely to be an attempt to sabotage Korea.

Even without the strange U.S. President, South Korea was an ally of the United States. Not the highest priority, but certainly not low. If ranked, it wouldn’t be top, but it would be close to the top.

“What if we refuse this?”

“What do you mean, what if? It ends there.”

But it didn’t seem like ‘that fighter jet’ would let it pass.

‘If I were Kim Jong-il, what would I think of this?’

Yes, if I were Kim Jong-il, I would think like this.

“I think I’ve been feeding my close aides well enough, but are you telling me they didn’t stop eating what I told them to, secretly ate pesticides, and finally their brains went bad? Or am I finally unable to contain my anger and got a hole in my head?”

Kim Jong-il repeatedly cursed, alternating between the diplomatic document and the official who delivered it. Today was a particularly bad day. The official had definitely picked the wrong time.

Being subjected to insults containing parental absence, sexual harassment, and personal attacks was unpleasant, but if it could save his life, he was willing to endure it. Anything was better than a ‘purge’.

Frankly, Kim Jong-il’s reaction was understandable. In North Korea, the blade of purge was about to fall at any moment due to the dynamite inventory investigation, yet here they were shouting ‘peace!’ It would be stranger if he wasn’t upset.

In fact, the ‘political prison camps were at full capacity’. Even for North Korea, this was excessive, proving Kim Jong-il was gradually losing his reason.

However, regardless of his fading reason, his body was honest. After nearly 30 minutes of verbal abuse, Kim Jong-il felt his tongue dry and his mouth sore. The cursing finally stopped, and the main point could be discussed.

“South Korea will supply 15 tons of polished rice, so we should have a joint entrance at this Winter Olympics? In this situation? Isn’t this completely crazy?”

Frankly, there was no reason to refuse. He even wanted to accept it. It wasn’t about participating, just a joint entrance.

‘But damn it. Why does it have to be the United States?’

That was the problem. The host country was the United States. For North Korea, the United States was forever the ‘century-old enemy’ and ‘American imperialist’. But had North Korea never participated in the Olympics held in the United States? That wasn’t true.

North Korea had proudly participated in the 1996 Atlanta Olympics, waving the light red flag of the republic. But was the situation the same then as now?

The illegally invading, vicious American imperialist group was riding tanks over the symbol of peace, spewing gray coughs, and now they were increasingly expanding their power. Thanks to the long period of brainwashing, the people were more united when they saw that, making it much easier to control the masses, but was this something that could be overlooked?

He could have threatened to close the door to dialogue unless the U.S. military withdrew immediately, but having met the head of the United States in person, he was certain they would turn all civilizations that had taken off on this northern land into a handful of ashes.

The ‘Stone Age’ they kept talking about. Kim Jong-il had seen the aspects of the Vietnam War and thought it was an exaggeration, but after meeting George Bush in person, he changed his mind.

‘That guy doesn’t make empty promises. He does what he says.’

Of course, if Bush heard this directly, he would issue an executive order and move the military, telling them not to spread rumors, but unfortunately, Bush was not here. He was the only person and primary physician who could treat Kim Jong-il’s anger management issues.

As Kim Jong-il simply drifted along, rowing in the sea of thought, he came to this conclusion.

“This 15 tons of polished rice. Hmm. Polished rice…”

The man who had only been cursing suddenly groaned, making them worry that something might be wrong, and they hurriedly spoke to him. If he died from illness or a sudden death, they might be implicated as assassins and end up in a political prison camp or be executed.

You never know how politics will turn out. Especially in the Republic!

“General, what’s wrong!”

In the end, it was a grand misfire.

“Quiet! Can’t you see I’m concentrating? Get out of here right now!”

Fortunately for him, Kim Jong-il issued an expulsion order. His forehead was slightly torn by the fountain pen that flew with the expulsion order, but this was a very good outcome.

‘Something’s strange. This 15 tons. Something.’

Normally, Kim Jong-il would have been angrier if an official was hurt, or at least reacted in some way, but now he was so focused on the hypothesis he had created that he didn’t express any reaction externally.

In any case, his ‘survival ability’ was outstanding enough to be in the top 0.1% of the entire human race, wasn’t it? Kim Jong-il instinctively smelled something strange in the 15 tons of polished rice. He was just one step away from figuring out exactly what it was, but no matter how much he thought about it, the feeling that it was unusual wouldn’t leave him.

‘The way things are handled is definitely South Korean, but they’re bringing this up with only two weeks left? Very suspicious, very suspicious. There’s definitely something there, isn’t there?’

Once he identified that there was definitely a problem, suspicions poured out as if a dam had collapsed.

‘Even if the International Olympic Committee is thirsty for attracting participating countries to the Winter Olympics, things will get difficult if they do this and that. Are they confident that I will agree to participate if I just say the word?’

Then it must be one of two things. Either the story has already been settled between South Korea and the International Olympic Committee, or someone is behind it. And if someone is behind it, it must be the United States. It wasn’t a very profound deduction.

‘The host country of the Winter Olympics is the United States, and the United States is behind South Korea, isn’t it?’

When his thoughts reached that point, he wished it was the former. Because then he could just ignore it completely. He could just take the rice and pretend he didn’t know anything.

But if it was the latter, things would get quite complicated. The United States wouldn’t express it outwardly, but they would be greatly angered, and the number of U.S. troops in North Korea would increase several times. That was the most ideal outcome, and the worst was, as expected, the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea and the artificial flag remaining as relics to be looked up in South Korean history books.

As Kim Jong-il used his survival skills to the maximum, he thought that even if it didn’t go to the worst, but only halfway, it would be fortunate if something like ‘evidence that the Republic also had a history’ remained.

‘Of course, if we actually go to war with the American imperialists, they won’t burn the entire country to the ground, will they…? No, they probably will. No matter how I think about it, they’re going to turn everything back to the Stone Age, aren’t they?’

“Damn it!”

Kim Jong-il cursed and sighed. But that didn’t solve anything. At least Kim Jong-il’s complicated feelings were somewhat relieved.

‘There’s no other way. I have to use this in the most effective way possible.’

Kim Jong-il nodded his chin, and the bodyguards from the Escort Bureau who were standing behind him picked up the fountain pen that Kim Jong-il had thrown earlier. It was an artwork made of ivory and small jewels, but it seemed to have cracked on the grip because it was usually handled roughly.

“Bring me a new one!”

And Kim Jong-il had many such fountain pens. Even if the money for the people was scarce, there was no one as generous as Kim Jong-il in decorating and cherishing himself.

‘I will sleep on firewood and lick gall to pledge revenge’ [an idiom meaning to endure hardship for future success].

Although the firewood was a luxurious bed that only the wealthiest could use, and the gall was a high-end dish cooked so that it wouldn’t be bitter, even that required a firm determination for Kim Jong-il. Kim Jong-il ground his teeth so hard that he heard tinnitus in his ears and felt a metallic taste in his mouth.

The conclusion Kim Jong-il reached was ‘approval’.

Upon hearing this news, Bush said,

“Wow, it worked.”

“It seems you don’t have to move the military to pressure North Korea.”

“Didn’t you say that moving the military would be a loss?”

“There was a time when I said that. But after recalculating, it doesn’t seem to cost that much. After all, we have to increase the number of U.S. troops stationed in North Korea anyway.”

“Hahaha! U.S. troops stationed in North Korea! We must strive to take Nampho Port!”

Bush laughed like that for a while, then tilted the glass containing espresso. Reflected in the black water was the chief of staff, who had taken another step closer to madness and the abyss.