In This Life, I Will Die As An Actress, Not As A Villainess [EN]: Chapter 93

After finishing the heart-pounding ad-lib scene, filming continued without a break.
Due to budget issues, they couldn’t afford to go over the tight shooting schedule by even a single day.

In the scene, her adoptive father, a carpenter, brought in a large piece of wood.
Bella’s eyes widened as she approached her grandfather.

“Wow! What is this?”
It was a rare glimpse of her cheerful side.

Grandfather Richard replied,
“I’m going to make a dining table. I’ll carve it out of this whole piece.”

She reached out to touch the unfamiliar wood, but Richard gently grabbed her wrist.
“I told you to always wear gloves when touching wood, Dad said.”
Richard put gloves on her hands.

She smiled at her father.
She thought of her own father back in Korea, eagerly waiting for his only daughter.

“I heard that in Korea, they call family ‘식구’ (sik-gu) [a Korean word that literally means ‘family member,’ but implies someone who eats together], right?”
She looked at her father, who had already studied Korean.

Richard, with his graying hair and beard, grinned.
“It’s a word that came from people who eat together. It’s a fun and warm word.”

Listening to Richard’s words, she touched the wood again with her gloved hands.
“I’m making this table with the hope that our family will live happily, eating together at it.”
This wood felt like a charm being made by her father.

Although Emily was the one who initially pushed for the move, when Bella joined in, the whole family united with one heart.
The new house they built and moved into was in California.
Far away from Pennsylvania, where they had lived before, the bright and warm sunshine of the Southwest brought peace to their hearts.

It was a stark contrast to Pennsylvania, which was often cloudy for long periods each season.
This major move required the help of many people.
Especially that person.

She looked out the window at Kim Hee-jung, who was inspecting every corner of the house from the outside.
Kim Hee-jung had ultimately granted her first and last wish.

‘Paying back the debt. I have no intention of approaching you or being forgiven.’
Leaving behind such cold words.

And then, she really tried to stay out of family gatherings and remained aloof throughout the work.
She watched Kim Hee-jung meticulously examining every part of the house from the outside.

Sensing her gaze, Richard said lightly,
“We should all have a meal together once the table is finished. Including your mother.”

Startled, she looked at Richard.
Richard wrinkled his nose.
Unconsciously, she bit her lip.
A frustrating situation where she couldn’t say yes or no.

She hated Kim Hee-jung terribly, but that hatred was so painful.
Perhaps Emily would want to let go of this feeling by now.
A line that seemed to be drawn from the depths of her core burst out.

“I don’t even know how I feel, Dad.”
Richard nodded as if he understood everything.
Looking at his face, she felt a surge of emotion and tried hard to suppress it.
Crying wasn’t in the script.

At the same time, she thought.
This project is truly strange.
In her previous life, she would prepare for filming by calculating her emotions, breathing, gaze, and even the number of times she blinked.

After starting to immerse herself in the world of the script, she would naturally become absorbed in the character and act.
And now, she was acting in a way she had never tried before.
Emotions popped out in every situation.
The acting that came out was always different from her calculations, but strangely, this unique adventure wasn’t bad.
Rather, she felt a different kind of thrill every time, which made her feel good.

She turned her gaze to the gloves on her hands.
It wasn’t in the script.
However, just looking at the gloves made her feel like she wasn’t alone as Emily anymore.
And then she turned her gaze to Bella, who was touching the wood with her.
For some reason, she felt a little confident.
Even though she had been abandoned by her biological mother, she was so loved that she felt she could share her love well with her own child.
Even if the new move and new beginning were just giving her false hope, she decided to indulge in it for a while.

* * *

And then, in the evening.
They immediately began filming the scene of sitting around the completed dining table and eating.
Before filming, the director said,
“Alright, we’re almost there. Let’s put in a little more effort. I’ll leave this scene to the actors’ ad-libs. Feel free to do whatever you want. Ready, action!”

Richard immediately clapped his hands.
“The barbecue is ready! Come on, everyone.”
Bella smiled brightly and ran to the table.

“The table is huge.”
“If you run out of beds when you bring your friends over later, you can have them sleep on top of it.”
Bella giggled at Richard’s ad-lib humor.
Bella was gradually regaining her smile.

At that moment.
Knock knock knock-
There was a knock on the front door.
Aiden, already knowing who it was, approached and opened the door.
Meanwhile, she forced a smile, trying to manage her stiffening expression.

The door opened, and the family’s gazes simultaneously turned to the same place.
And there stood Kim Hee-jung, with an equally awkward and stiff expression.
A moment of silence flowed through the house.

“Come on in. We’ve just set everything up,” Sandra said in a friendly voice, breaking the silence.
Kim Hee-jung nodded and approached the table.

“Alright, shall we eat? Emily, Aiden, Bella. Congratulations on the move! Hee-jung, thank you,” Richard said, and everyone sat down and picked up their forks and knives.
In the cheerful atmosphere of the meal, a quiet silence flowed only between her and Kim Hee-jung.
Lost in thought, she slowly chewed her food.
After this meal, Kim Hee-jung was scheduled to return to Korea.
True to her personality, Kim Hee-jung even refused her parents’ request to stay for even one night.
She looked at Kim Hee-jung, putting a small piece of steak in her mouth.
So that’s what Kim Hee-jung’s face looks like when she’s eating and chewing something.
As if to make a final impression, she carefully watched her face, but Kim Hee-jung, sensing her gaze, looked at her.
Their eyes met for a brief moment, and silence flowed.
Then, Kim Hee-jung turned her head and focused on eating again without saying anything.

* * *

After the meal, on the terrace.
Kim Hee-jung and she stood alone in the center of several installed cameras.
There were no staff members in this place, where only the sounds of insects echoed.
The lighting was also pre-installed.
It was the director’s consideration for the actors filming the last scene.
Standing there facing each other, she felt strange.
Kim Hee-jung looked at her with deep eyes without saying a word.
As if she had really become Emily, she hesitated about what to say, but Kim Hee-jung spoke words that weren’t in the script.

“I saw you eating for the first time today.”
“…”
She was startled by those words.
To hide her feelings, she quickly turned her head.
It was her senior’s ad-lib.
So, she had the same thoughts as her when filming at the table earlier.
Confused, she only looked at the innocent field…

“I chose building houses instead of raising children like others do for a lifetime,” Kim Hee-jung said calmly.
Hearing those words, she slowly turned her head back to look at Kim Hee-jung.

“That’s what I liked, I did.”
“…I didn’t ask.”
“I know. Because you didn’t ask. So I spoke first.”
“…”
“You didn’t get angry, you didn’t resent me, you didn’t even ask why. I wanted you to ask. Why didn’t you raise me?”
But… as she heard the reason why she was abandoned, her heart began to calm down.
It was an inexplicable thing.

“The life of architect Kim Hee-jung was my choice. I had to give you up, but I never regretted it for a moment. This is how I take responsibility for that choice. Instead.”
“Instead?”
“I hope your choices lead to a happy ending. More than mine.”
This was Kim Hee-jung’s farewell.
Hearing those words, she leaned against the terrace wall.
And Kim Hee-jung and she simultaneously gazed far away in the same direction.
A long, long silence flowed.

* * *

Leaving behind the dreamlike filming and returning to her Korean home, it was already early winter, well past November.
The American schedule was also finished with a short production presentation.
The movie was in post-production.
For the first time in recent years, her year-end schedule was completely empty.
I’m unemployed for the time being.
Sniffling in the cold weather, she shook her wet hair.
It must be almost time for post-editing to be finished.
It’s about time I get a call.
As she picked up her phone, a message arrived from director Raymond.

-Sena, our Snowfall Film Festival has been invited!

Huh, Snowfall?
Snowfall was the dream stage for directors who make art films or filmmakers who have just made their debut.
Its scale wasn’t one of the world’s leading ones, but its reputation was by no means inferior to the majors.
It was the most prestigious event for those who love independent and art films.
What should I say, it’s the most minor among the majors, and the most major among the minors.
This was her first time going to a film festival, not only in this life but also in her previous life.
Her heart fluttered with joy.
She was happy about being invited to the film festival for a moment.

-But there’s a slight problem. Our screening overlaps with Warner’s release date.

Huh?
How can that be?
Warner’s movie is full of CG, and even if they started filming around the same time, it would take another year to finalize it.
Then another message arrived.
This time it was from Aiden.

-Sena! Did you get the call? It’s Warner’s again. I avoided , but I ended up facing .
Reading Aiden’s message, she finally understood the situation.
Warner’s movie that would be competing with was the second work in the series, .
In order, it was right before , which she had auditioned for.
Could it be.
A sense of unease made her quickly connect to the internet.
Sure enough, , Warner’s, , her name, and Lee Nara’s name were listed in the real-time search terms.
She sighed.
Articles with heavily baited titles were pouring out.

[Han Sena vs. Lee Nara, the Third Showdown!]
[Han Sena’s Hometown vs. Lee Nara’s Warner’s!]
[Han Sena, ‘Senior, I’ll be at the film festival first~’ Heading to Snowfall!]
[Han Sena’s Reckless Move, How Far Will It Go?]
It’s not even a movie starring Lee Nara, but it’s already like this….
Checking the first article, it had already been uploaded four hours ago.
‘Four hours ago? That can’t be.’
Even she, the cast member, just found out.
When did these people get the information? Where from?
Then another message came from director Raymond again.
A detailed explanation of this matter was written.

-Sena, don’t pay too much attention to the articles. We decided to release it as a world premiere at Snowfall after being invited, but we found out late that it overlapped with .
-I didn’t want to give up Snowfall just because we were competing with Warner’s. It may be my greed, but since the confrontation was already created before the movie even started production, I don’t think we need to avoid it.
-And our goals are different from Warner’s~^^ I really enjoyed this work.
She chuckled at the last message.
You’re sometimes cute in strange places.
The director’s explanations were also convincing enough.
There was no need to be swayed by the media’s constant use of Warner’s and Lee Nara to form a frame.
And we can also use this continuous word-of-mouth to our advantage.
Interest in the director’s movie, which wasn’t well known in Korea, will gradually increase.
The number of viewers will increase.
Let’s not waste our energy on unnecessary things anymore.
She turned off her phone screen and started drying her hair.
“Oh right, what happened to that?”
She put her phone down for a moment and picked it up again to send a message to the director again.

-Director, what happened to the cut with the hunters back then?
A reply came immediately.

-We got their consent safely. They also apologized. They also asked me to tell Sena that they were sorry.
Her eyes widened at the message.
Those people?
How suddenly?

-They were about to be caught by civic groups and animal protection associations for hunting in a hunting prohibited area. We made a deal with them~^^.”
“Ah.”
The director unexpectedly had a Zhuge Liang-like quality [referring to Zhuge Liang, a famous strategist known for his cunning and intelligence].
Relieved, she put her phone down again.
Anyway, I have to pack again to attend Snowfall.
As soon as she came to Korea, she looked at the large carrier that she had immediately put on top of the closet.
I never thought I would live a life where I would go to the airport so often.
I will die as an actress, not a villain, in this life.